


After the End

by Rasha007



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2018-08-30 16:04:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 50,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8539507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rasha007/pseuds/Rasha007
Summary: Sequel to Roommate. After the End some things change and some things never do. Rated M for violence, foul language, adult content in future chapters. Beta: scriptor412 slow updates





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, the first chapter of the sequel is here, as always this was possible only thanks to my dear friend scriptor412 who once again agreed to be a beta for this story. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Let me know how did you like it and what do you think about the change of the POV.

The two men standing on the rails were startled by rustling leaves behind them. Thinking it’s a walker coming they both got their knives ready and prepared to kill it. However, out of the woods came a man, a big one at that. Though he had a smile on his face it didn’t reach his eyes, and he looked anything but friendly. Now in the world without an order, the world where anyone could do anything without any threat of punishment for crimes, a man became more dangerous than the walkers around. Almost out of reflex Rick’s hand went to his gun, and before his brain had the chance to catch up he had it out of the holster and pointed at the new arrival. The man had his arms outstretched already in nonthreatening gesture, but seeing the gun pointing at him he stopped and moved his hands up.

“Whoa, whoa! I ain’t lookin' for no trouble. We just couldn’t help but overhear your conversation and wanted to offer our help.” 

“We don’t want or need your help!” Was Rick’s immediate answer, his eyes started to search the woods around them while trying to keep an eye on the man in front of them at the same time. The gun not budging from its target. Merle made a face, somehow he thought they would be more open to the possibility of having more people for securing the place. It looks not, but it’s his and Lumen’s best shot at getting inside, to see... so he tried again.

“Wait a minute. I’m sure we can work something out. I am a great shot, my friend is a decent one too-” gun cock sound made him shut his mouth. 

“Rick!” Glenn hissed beside him, “we actually do need the help.” 

“Yeah, but not from them!” Rick hissed back, his eyes still searching their surrounding. He couldn’t find anything that would give the other man’s location away, “where’s your friend? Tell whoever’s there to come out. Hands up!”

“I won’t call for her to come here until you point that thing elsewhere,” Merle said slowly, raising his eyebrow as if explaining something to an idiot. 

“Her?” Glenn asked.

“Yes, her, as in a woman. That’s not the point though. The point is, we had kinda the same idea with the same problem. We figured, why not help each other. We could clean this place together. I bet there is enough space for all of us. What do you say?”

Nobody budged for what seemed like an eternity but then Rick slowly lowered his arm, and Merle chanced to lower his. A _woman_ as a company of _this_ man, that was unexpected to say at least. It tugged at some part in Rick, a part that made him want to check on her, to see if she’s alright. But he had to remind himself that things were different now. They could be both dangerous, woman or not. He eyed the man for another minute before asking. “How can we trust you not to try anything once we get inside? Or before that for that matter?”

“Guess you can’t,” Merle said, earning a scowl and a gun in his face yet again. _Damn it_. He hated this, he was no beggar. Just as he was about to reach for his own gun and end this bullshit, the rustling was heard once again from the bushes behind him and then Lumen came into view, hands up. Merle shot her disapproving glare. He told her clearly she was to stay hidden until he came to an agreement with them. She mouthed ‘sorry’ but looked anything but. Maybe just a little nervous. Then she turned her attention to the two men in front of them.

“Hi, I’m Lumen, I’m the friend. He’s not lying. We really mean no harm to anyone. Let me just tell you our proposition and if you won’t like it, we leave.” She knew that was bullshit. They wouldn't leave until they see for themselves that Daryl was no longer there or his dead body. But she couldn't possibly say that.

Glenn and Rick exchanged a look. Rick still seemed distrusting, Glenn didn’t seem much more trusting, nevertheless, he was sporting an almost pleading expression. Finally, Rick lowered his gun slightly and gave the smallest nod for her to continue, “okay, what’s your proposition?”

She stepped tentatively closer to Merle while putting her hands down, “look, I know it’s harder to trust people these days more than before, believe me, we found out the hard way. But there is only two of us, and you have a group. We heard you talking about other people. Don’t you see? We are the ones who should be really worried here-”

“I still don’t hear any proposition!” Rick cut her off impatiently. Maybe it’s some echo from his past, some police radar, but Merle’s presence has been keeping him on edge since the moment he showed up. 

“The thing is,” Lumen continued after giving Merle nervous glance, her confidence about her intervention wavering, “we’ve been looking for quite some time for a place we could call home. We are tired and this prison at least looks to have the potential to be safe. We could make it safe. But we won’t be able to clear it by ourselves and you have your doubts about being successful too. So let us help. He wasn’t lying, he is an excellent shot. And not just that, he’s ex-military, and he’s been teaching me for awhile now. We clear it together, and then we stay in separate parts and we won’t bother you. I am a nurse and he can hunt, we are pretty self-sufficient. You won’t even know we are there. Unless you’d need me to stitch someone up.” She smiled, trying to lighten the mood.

Something about what she said must have been right because the scowl disappeared from Rick’s face being replaced by a calculating one and soon he was looking between them as if he just bought new toys and didn’t know with which one to play first. He relaxed his posture and put his gun back in the holster attached to his right thigh. Nodding to himself he finally spoke.

“Okay, alright. Come with us then. We’ll talk more with others about everything,” Rick said motioning for them to move. He suddenly stopped and pointed at Merle, his eyes hardening once more, “either of you try anything, I won’t hesitate to kill you, are we clear?”

“Crystal,” Merle rumbled, Lumen just nodded then looked behind her and nudged Merle’s side. He looked down at her and nodded in understanding to her silent question. Yes, they are taking their stuff right now, if the group meant trouble they better have all their guns on them. He turned his attention back to the two man waiting on them, “I’ll just grab our stuff and we are good to go.”

He then walked off into the bushes behind him, leaving Lumen to stand awkwardly by herself, waiting. Seeing the taller man had narrowed his eyes, staring at the place Merle disappeared to, she cleared her throat more loudly than necessary, successfully drawing his attention to her, “he went for our bags, we do have some guns. I thought it would be better to go make a deal without waving them in your face, you know since weren’t going to shoot at you and all…” she trailed off. Their arsenal probably wasn’t the best topic to start this conversation with, because Rick went from scowling at the forest to looking at her with more interest than before. 

“Oh yeah? What kind of guns you two have?” he asked, but before she could form a response, one came from behind her.

“All sorts of.” She heard Merle and let out a breath she didn’t even realize she was holding and went closer to him while he continued, “I like my guns, most of them are mine from before this shit started.”

Rick nodded, “right, ex-military you said. Makes sense. Let’s go then.” 

The party started to move after that. Glenn looked rather relieved even though his nervous eyes kept jumping to Merle. They did need the help, and he was glad they came to an agreement with the pair but something about him made him uneasy. But then again, every new person was potential threat these days.

After few minutes of walking, when neither Rick or Glenn paid them attention, Merle leaned over to whisper in Lumen’s ear, “Nice speech back there sweetheart. You would make a fortune have you’d been a salesman.” He chuckled.

“Somehow I don’t think that profession would impress them right now,” she mock whispered back.

“Oh yeah, you made us almost indispensable. One would think we are good people, ready to help with anything.” 

She turned her head and looked him straight in the eyes. “We are good people, Merle.” 

He stared back for a moment and then started laugh aloud making their companions look back at them. “You are cute, always have been,” he said while throwing his arm around her shoulders, pinning her to his side.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

They walked the rest of the way in silence. All of them too busy to keep an eye on their surrounding while keeping the other eye on their new companions. After few more minutes, Rick stopped and motioned to the trees on the right side of the rails. 

“The rest of our group is waiting for us that way. Let me explain the situation to them first, and then I’ll come get you, okay? Glenn here will stay with you.”

“What? Afraid we’ll rob you if you leave us unsupervised?” Merle rasped, and when Rick didn’t give an answer a grin formed on his face. “You actually do? Do you really think chinaman here stands a chance against me? Better question yet, how incapable that group of yours actually is for you to agree to let us in even if you are afraid of us? You sure have to want inside that prison really bad!” He continued amused. He was in his element, and he was enjoying every second of the picture of the two nervous sucks in front of him. Lumen, on the other hand, wasn’t amused. She knew they have to keep their interest in the prison seemingly random and casual, but there was surely a better way of doing it than making them look like a threat to the group. Glenn’s expression turned solemn and she heard him mutter something about Korea while Rick turned his scowl to the trees behind them. This wasn’t good. She was about to step in to salvage what she could out of the situation when Rick did it himself. She expected a gun in their faces again, but instead, he looked Merle straight into the eyes and started to talk calmly.

“Alright, here’s the thing. We, our group, we’ve been on our own for months now. They are my responsibility, and if there would be another choice for me there wouldn’t be any agreement between us. Unfortunately, I don’t have other choices and there is a pregnant woman in my group. That pregnant woman is my wife.” His eyes flicked to Lumen. It was a subtle gesture but the meaning was clear. They don’t need them only to clean the place. “So you are right, we do need this place badly, and so I’m taking the risk with you. But that doesn’t mean I just lead you to my people and let you roam around hoping you won’t kill us all. So now I need to go and prepare them for the news, and I ask you to stay here with Glenn and wait until I come get you. Can we agree on that?” he asked, his gaze glued to Merle.

Although he didn’t lose his grin, his posture got straighter, his shoulder tense. “Merle?” He heard Lumen quietly talking beside him. He glanced down at her, seeing her silently pleading with him. Well, of course, he’d agree with that. They needed inside as badly as the group.

“Sure, leave the chinaman here, we’ll wait,” he answered.

“I’m Korean.” The man in question muttered.

“Whatever!” Merle waved him off, “Go talk to your people,” he said, taking his bag off and sitting on the rails petting the place beside him for Lumen to join him,“ we’ll be here.”

Rick hovered for few more moments before nodding. First to himself, then to Glenn, who returned the gesture and without another word he went off.

When they couldn’t see him anymore Lumen elbowed Merle to his side and started to talk quietly so Glenn, who was standing by the treeline, wouldn’t hear her.

“What the hell was that? I thought we wanted them to like us.” 

He turned to her, so the other man wouldn’t see him and dropped the grin, “not necessarily. We’ll have Daryl with us soon enough, ah ah ah, what’s that? No doubty faces! He’s there! I just wanted to see how he’d react and he proved me right. He’d like to think he has the situation under control but he obviously doesn’t. That’s good news for us, he won't be no trouble. He’s not as tough as he’d like to think he is.”  
_Right, of course_. She thought. This right there is why he’s the one in charge. Not only she’s a terrible character judge, but he’s always several steps ahead of her. Seeing her annoyed expression he gave her a small but real smile, “Don’t be so hard on yourself, we make a great team! No one talks like you! I bet that special calming aura of yours is spreading like a fucking wildfire every time you open your pretty mouth.” 

“It’s the nursing training, you know that. You have to talk calmly to the patients,” she muttered, blushing. 

“Of course it is,” he winked at her, “now I need to get the feeling of the group. I don’t think we have anything to worry about.”

“You never think we have something to worry about.”

“Exactly!” he said cheerfully with a mean glint in his eyes that always turned any expression he’s sporting somehow sinister, always reminding her who she’s actually traveling with. Who they are traveling for together. 

Since _that_ night they never actually talked about what happened, about what Daryl does, or about how deep in Merle was or wasn’t involved. Not during the investigation, not during the trial, not after Daryl was sentenced to death after the long process. She was never brave enough to ask anything specific and wasn’t sure if Merle even had the answers. After Daryl was allowed to have visits she had refused to go at first. She didn’t really know how to deal and the only person in the world that continued to treat her the same as before was also the only person who linked her to Daryl. She was angry and she missed him. Those two emotions were fighting in her and she thought that if she went to see him, to talk to him, that it would help her to find the closure to all this mess. So she went. 

By the time she got to the prison she was a nervous wreck. But when he came and sat at the other side of the glass and looked kindly into her eyes, all the anger toward him has evaporated. She felt whole again, she felt home. And so she continued to visit him, and she never asked. It was just so much easier to pretend. She moved back in his house, continued with her studies, and after some time people actually stopped openly staring at her. 

She lived inside a strange bubble, preferring to keep from any non-working relationships. Between the times she and Merle went to see Daryl he dropped by here and there, to leave the meat after a hunt, to ask her to patch him up after a fight, to have a dinner with her. Meaning he wanted free, warm, homemade meal. That one topic though was never opened. 

When the world as they knew it ended they were actually excited. As odd as it sounds it was the exact thing they felt because it meant a chance for Daryl. 

So they packed and went right to the prison, Merle's idea. He was confident Daryl would stay put and wait for them to find him. It took them the whole winter to get there, a lot of time to think. What would this new order of the world do with someone like Daryl? Now she really regretted she never asked, that she didn't really know much about that part of Daryl. She saw first hand in their time on the road what Merle is capable of, how he operated in this new world. Thinking about that, despite her feelings for him, the closer they got to the prison, the more nervous she felt about seeing Daryl again.


	2. Chapter 2

They didn’t have to wait for long. Seeing the reluctance in both men to accept their proposition, Merle assumed it would take ages to convince the rest of their group. But when he saw Rick emerge from the treeline after merely twenty minutes of waiting he knew where the tough bravado came from. Rick wasn’t _talking_ to the group about them, no, he was _telling_ them how it would be. Ha! He’ll have another thing coming if he tries that shit with him, Merle thought. It could also be that the group was a bunch of pussies without an opinion though. 

The other guy shot to his feet as soon as he saw Rick approaching. Behind him, there were other people coming out of the forest. Merle looked them over, he saw an old guy, a black guy, a kid, and bunch of women. One was heavily pregnant and was clinging to the little boy’s shoulder, two blonds who looked like they got lost during a school trip, one of them gave an unsure wave and a quiet “hi”, and a brunette whose eyes were nervously jumping between all of them while having a death grip on a handgun in her hand. He looked then thoughtfully at Lumen him and whispered, “They look like a bunch of pussies, but let’s not underestimate them just yet, yeah?”

“Absolutely,“ she said quietly while they started to stand up to meet the group, “maybe you could try to not piss them off in the first five minutes, huh?” She raised her eyebrows at him while they started to stand up to meet the group.

“You got it, sweetheart,” he smirked as he stood to his full height. Rick gave an awkward cough to get everyone’s attention. Then he motioned with one hand to the pair, but before he managed to say anything Merle beat him to it. “Well, well, well, look at that. Trying to repopulate the Earth already? While I don’t think it’s a very wise idea I’m more than happy to help with the process! You seem to have a lot of beauty to share there! I’ll share if you do.” He paused very briefly, scanning all the shell shocked faces, “how does it work here? Every man one woman? Or do you swap? Oh, or is the old man watching out for cherries there until they are ready for the popping? I can help with that too sweetcheeks. I’m not picky!” he hollered at Rick while winking at the blond who waved at them earlier. She in response took a step back looking around her only to see a slight panic in the other girl’s eyes. Several people then started talking at once.

“Rick?” The pregnant lady called sternly while pushing the boy behind her.

Rick’s eyes stayed on Merle, his hand unclasped the holster on his side. “What did you jus-” he started but Lumen cut in.

“MERLE!” She slapped his chest with the back of one of her hands and raised the other quickly palm up, “he doesn’t mean that he’s joking! He has a terrible sense of humor!” she blurted out so quickly she wasn’t sure if they had caught everything she said.

“What? Who’s joking? I’m happy to help any of the lovely ladies here to some good time.” Merle stated with a chuckle, grinning down at her.

“No, he wouldn’t!” she tried to save the situation before hissing at him, “What are you doing?!” 

The group was watching the display in front of them, exchanging confused glances, unsure how to handle the situation. The pair wasn’t armed, and besides the weird talk, they weren’t doing anything. Sure the girl looked frustrated but otherwise okay. Eventually, the older man stepped forward.

“Look mister…” he started, waiting for Merle to fill in his name, which he didn’t. Merle turned his head in the old man’s direction but stayed quiet. When the man realized he’s not going to get other reaction he continued, “alright then, look, Rick explained to us the deal you made and I personally think it’s the right thing to do. People should stick together in hard times like this. We should all reach in our souls and channel that good part of ourselves, that part I’m sure every one of us has somewhere inside. We have to help each other or otherwise we, as human kind, have already lost. For all that, I am willing to believe that you are good people and that we all will get along. My name is Hershel Greene,” he motioned to his left, “this young lady here is Maggie, my daughter,” he gave Merle a pointed look, and then he motioned to his right, “and this is Beth, my youngest. So, you see, if you could keep your propositions to yourself, I’d appreciate that greatly.” 

Everyone stayed silent for a moment, all eyes on Merle, waiting for his reaction. All of them holding a different kind of emotion. Lumen was giving him pleading look, Hershel’s eyes stayed calm, the girls were staring wide-eyed, there was a confusion in Glenn’s eyes, doubt in Lori’s, and Rick and the black guy were sporting an angry look. Merle’s gaze went from one person to another before stopping back on Hershel.

“Well momma here is useless, what about that one?” Merle pointed to the wave blonde, “any relation to her? Niece, granddaughter maybe?”

“Merle stop it.” Lumen whined, gripping and tugging at his arm, not understanding his point and scared the group will decide to leave them behind or worse. Hershel though seemed to see right through what Merle was doing at that point, because he shook his head at Rick who was about to step in and actually smiled at Merle before answering.

“Amy isn’t my kin by blood. She is one of our group though, and what I said applies to her too.”

Merle slapped his hands together and rubbed them contently, the noise making several people jump. “Alright, good! Damn, that’s really good thing to know, wouldn’t want Lumen here with a group who’d trade women like a cattle, isn’t that right, sweetheart?” No answer came from her, she just stared at him speechless, with her mouth opening and closing like a fish. “Excellent, I’m glad we are on the same note here.” With that he turned to get their bags, he slipped the bigger one on his shoulders and pushed the other one in Lumen’s arms. When she didn’t react he nudged her impatiently, “well come on! We are losing the light and we have a prison to conquer.”

He saw Hershel squeezing the brunette's arm reassuringly as he passed her on his way to the rails, “I’m glad we came to an understanding mister….” he tried again when he got to them.

“Merle, just call me Merle, no need for formalities now, is it.” 

By that time Lumen woke up from her shocked state and offered Hershel her hand which he accepted with another smile. “I’m Lumen, please to meet you.” 

“Likewise,” he answered kindly. 

Lumen then inspected the people behind him. The pregnant lady and Rick seemed to have an argument while the other two guys and Maggie stayed close, looking highly uncomfortable. Beth, on the other hand, grabbed Amy’s arm and dragged her to them. Once she got there she held out her hand to Lumen to shake it, which she did.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Beth!” She announced with a bright smile and then offered her hand to Merle. 

_Looks like the good faith in people runs in the family. Or she’s just too young and naive to know better. Who knows, who cares?_ He thought before shaking her hand with a wink. “Well hello little lady,” he grinned at her widely and then looked at the other blond who was hovering several steps behind, just watching the exchange. 

When Amy realized his attention switched to her she quickly averted her eyes and looked back to the rest of the group. The argument there seemed to be put at pause, not resolved if the angry look on the pregnant lady’s face was anything to go by, and they were all moving to them now too. 

As soon as they got there Rick proceed to introduce everyone, “This is my wife Lori,” he beckoned to the boy to come to him and put both hands on the boy’s shoulders. “My son Carl. You already know Glenn, and this here is Theodore. We have our vehicles back on the road. So we can all go back there and figure the best way around to get to the prison. ”

“Oh, we know how to get there,” Lumen stated without thinking. 

“We have our car nearby too. We’ve already went through that part, we were only figuring how to get in afterward. I’ll show you on a map.” Merle quickly cut in.

Theodore stepped forward, “great, you can call me T-Dog or just T, that's what my friends always called me,” he said offering his hand too.

“Yeah, no. Now that we have all the pleasantries behind us how about we finally move this party, huh?” Merle ignored the gesture, turned his back to him and started to walk toward the road. 

T-Dog was about to let his arm fall when it was grabbed and shaken, “Lumen, nice to meet you.” And with that, she was off to catch up with Merle whose strides were creating a distance between them rather quickly.

“Care to let me in on your plan? Because I don’t get it,” she asked quietly but firmly once she got to his side. 

“What do you mean? You know the plan,” he replied calmly.

“I don’t obviously,” she muttered before grabbing his forearm, “Why are you constantly trying to piss them off? What if they decided they had enough and shoot us dead?”

He reached to pat the hand that was clinging to his arm. “I had a gun on me. Don’t worry sweetheart, I was ready for whatever outcome.”

“Oh really?” She huffed, “you against all of them? You are not bullet proof, Merle! Neither am I!” She wasn’t screaming, she very rarely screamed, however, her voice was starting to gain the volume, so he peeled off the hand from his arm and pulled her to his side in a half hug. 

“You need to calm down, Lumen,” he whispered while checking on the group behind them. They were far enough, so he continued, “They wouldn’t do nothing, Rick’s the only one with the balls to actually pull the trigger but seeing the look he gave us earlier, he wouldn’t, he needs us. He sure needs you, you’re a nurse! People that know medical shit are and will be hard to come by nowadays!”

“So why-oh God! Did you ask because you actually thought it could be a possibility?” She squealed.

“What? Come on, stop it!” He scolded her and forced her back to his side when she tried to move away. “Of course not, who do you think I am? I know my standards are pretty low, and after these last few months of major blue balls they sure got even lower, but you know very well I’m not one to force a woman. I wanted to see how’d they react, just to be sure they aren’t either, that’s all. The fact they are too much of pussies to shoot someone doesn’t mean they couldn’t be doing other things. And as you so nicely pointed out, there is a bunch of them and only two of us. I needed to be as sure as possible, alright? Now settle down!”

“What about Theodore back there, huh? You can’t let go of that shit even now?”

“Fuck him! What kind of name is T-Dog? Sounds like he’s part of some damn gang or something. The only thing he knows something about is how to rob you, I bet.”

“Oh this is just precious, you are one to tal-” 

“Everything alright here?” They heard Rick behind them, closer than they thought him to be.

“We are doing great.” Merle uttered over his shoulder.

“I was talking to her.” He pressed, making the pair stop. 

Lumen turned still under Merle’s arm looking back at Rick. “What did he say?” She forced calmness into her tone. They could be fighting, but these people were still strangers, and she’d rather if she and Merle presented a united front against them.

Rick eyed them for a second before shaking his head. “Alright then. I just came to tell you that cars are that way.” He pointed to the other direction.

“Ok, we’ll go to get ours and we’ll catch up.” Merle waved him off and continued dragging Lumen towards Daryl’s truck which they were using, having Merle’s bike secured on its bed.  


_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Turned out that Rick’s group was actually literally around the corner, not far at all from their truck. They decided to move all cars near the prison yard, cut through the fence and secure the field from the catwalk and guard towers. They took all their arsenal with them, if things went south they better have all they got with them. Once they were there, the hole secured behind them, they moved by the fence to come up with the best way to carry out their plan. 

Rick looked over the field with optimism. “We can do this.” He said almost as if to himself. 

“How do we shut the gate?” Hershel asked, not looking as optimistic as Rick about the plan.

“I’ll go, I’m the fastest. You guys cover me.” Glenn tried to volunteer.

“No,” Maggie protested immediately, “It's a suicide run.”

“No,” Rick agreed with her, “it was my plan, I'll run for the gate. You, Maggie, Beth, T, and Amy draw as many as you can over there. Pop 'em through the fence.” He then turned to Merle, looking suddenly a little unsure. “Guess we’ll see how good you actually are with that thing, huh?”

For once, there was no snarky comment coming from Merle, he wanted inside as badly as the rest of them, and he was focused on that at the moment. “You go on and don’t worry, I’ll have your back,” he patted the rifle he was holding, “I don’t miss, and Lumen here is pretty good too,” he smiled down at her, “we’ll take that tower,” he pointed behind him.

Rick gave a curt nod, “All right. Hershel, you and Carl take this tower.”

He took the chain with snap shackles and waited until all of them got to their positions. Then Lori opened the gate for him and he ran. He tried to not look that much around him at all the dead shuffling now to get to him, he tried to block out the shouting and gunshots, his focus solely on the gate he was supposed to close.

He had to slow down for a second to shoot the walkers in his way. When he heard a thud of a corpse falling to the ground behind him, he turned around only to see another one reaching for him. Before he could even react the walker's head exploded and its body fell to the ground. Rick looked to the tower only to see Merle giving him a mock salute and then shooing him away to continue. And he did. He got to the gate, closed it and quickly ran to the tower beside it. 

“Light it up!” He yelled once he climbed to the lookout.

It didn’t take long after that for them to take care of the rest of the walkers in the now secure yard. When all of them were finally lying on the ground truly dead now Merle turn to Lumen with a shit eating grin on his face, “almost there sweetheart. I’m telling you, this time tomorrow we’ll have Daryl back!”

She looked back at him, smiling widely. Relief momentary flooding her body, “we did it! I can’t believe we are this close, after all this time!” she said while throwing her arms around his torso and squeezing him in a hug. 

He patted her back with his free arm, “I know, now come on! Let’s go and plant a seed about pushing into the prison into Rick’s great mind,” he smirked, waggling his eyebrows.

Lumen let go and looked around, the euphoric mood leaving her as she did. There were walkers all around the place. The yard was full of now truly dead bodies and on the other side of the gate leading to the buildings were even more of them still shuffling around. The longer she was watching the scene the tighter her throat got. “Merle?” Her voice shook as she called him, “do you truly believe-what if he’s-” she couldn’t even finish that thought. She has been so focused on how nervous she was about seeing Daryl again, she forgot about the possibility of never seeing him again.

Merle went to stand next to her. He stayed quiet while inspecting the scene in front of them. “He’s here, I just know it. And we are going in and we are gonna find him!” He said firmly. “Now come on.” 

He never said they're going to find him alive though.

They all worked hard to move all the bodies to piles on the sides, deciding to burn them all tomorrow. Lumen took the keys from the truck and she went with Beth and Amy to move the cars closer and to get their stuff to prepare themselves for the night. T-Dog, Glenn, and Maggie went with them and then continued to gather firewood, leaving Lori, Carl and Hershel to rest. Merle took that moment to approach Rick, who was walking around, checking the fence for holes or other damage. 

Merle lighted a cigarette and fell in step with him watching the fence. “So, that went alright. Quick, clean.” He blew the smoke out.

“Yeah,” Rick said absently, trying to yank a particular part that looked bent. It didn’t budge from its place. 

“Did you think about pushing further?” Merle asked.

“What do you mean?” Rick turned to him.

“I was just thinking, now that there is more of us, we could try for the cellblock, would be nice to have a roof over our heads, is all. Think about it.” He finished his smoke and walked away to meet Lumen to help her with their bags. 

“So? How did it go?” She asked as soon as he was within earshot.

“Good,” he replied with a big grin, “didn’t take much, the man has a wife who’s about to burst. You should see his eyes when I mentioned it. We are so going in tomorrow.” He said confidently, taking the bag from her.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The night came soon, T-Dog took the first watch, Rick was still walking around the fence while the rest of them sat around the fire. They all ate and at the moment all of them were quiet, just enjoying the safety of the place. Hershel was sampling earth, letting it fall through his fingers. He looked up with a small smile, “if we can dig a canal under the fence, we'll have plenty of fresh water. The soil is good. We could plant some seed. Grow some tomatoes, cucumbers, soybeans.” He was thinking aloud and Maggie was nodding, agreeing with his statements.

“Are you a farmer?” Merle asked, eying the man, “I thought you were a doctor or something. You know, since you seem to look after her.” He pointed at Lori.

“Daddy’s a veterinarian.” Beth cut into the conversation. “But we had a farm.”

“Ohhh!” Merle let out a chuckle, “that makes the two of you farmers daughters! Shit, that’s just fantastic, how old you are again?” He gave the blond a lustful smile, “if you are up to it we could play one scenario I got on my mind for ages-”

“-Merle, stop being a pig!” Lumen rushed to cut off that line of thoughts, seeing the smile disappearing from Hershel's face, Lori dropping the bowl she was holding, Beth’s eyes reaching the size of a dinner plate... she didn’t dare to check how are the others reacting, instead she turned her attention back to the man sitting beside her, “Do you seriously think someone would say yes to that?” 

“You know what? I think I liked you better when you were all shy and quiet! And for your information women can’t get enough of old Merle. You wouldn’t know because you never tried. Actually, I knew plenty of girls who would say yes to that!” He sounded very pleased with himself too.

“Oh God, of course, you did! Those drunk enough to not recognize who they were talking to! You don’t make propositions like that to a seventeen old girl!” She scolded him.

He eyed Beth, “seventeen, huh, does that mean you neve-ouch, stop slapping me! I don’t slap you every time I don’t like what you say and it happens more often than you’d think, _sweetheart_!” He complained while rubbing the spot she hit as if it actually hurt him. But seeing not only hers but also Hershel's unamused, frowning face he rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, you know I’m not serious. Just having some fun, is all,” he said nonchalantly, lightening a smoke as if nothing had happened, choosing to ignore all of them.

Lumen pointedly looked at him, “I do, but they don’t!” She then addressed the audience, “I'm sorry! He really isn't a bad person. There is just a filter missing between his brain and his mouth!” 

“Oh it’s missing now? That’s fucking progress, last time it was nonexistent,” he uttered, looking sideways at her.

“It’s okay,” Beth said quietly. Lumen wasn’t sure how okay she really was, but although Hershel didn’t look happy at all, no one was yelling at them to get out of there, so there was that. “Did you two know each other before this all happened?” Beth asked curiously. “You seem close.”

Lumen glanced back at Merle, they agreed to give as little information about themselves as possible, “Well,” she started, but was cut off by Rick coming back to them.

“Better all turn in,” he said as he sat down next to Lori. T-Dog sat down too, taking a plate with a dinner they saved for him. “I’ll take watch over there. Got a big day tomorrow.” Rick continued.

“What do you mean?” Carl asked. 

“Look, I know we're all exhausted. This was a great win. But we've got to push just a little bit more,” he started to explain, “Most of the walkers are dressed as guards and prisoners. Looks like this place fell pretty early. It could mean the supplies may be intact. They'd have an infirmary, a commissary. An armory, that would be outside the prison itself, but not too far away. Warden's offices would have info on the location. Weapons, food, medicine. This place could be a gold mine.”

“We're dangerously low on ammo. We'd run out before we make a dent,” Hershel objected.

“That's why we have to go in there hand to hand,” Rick insisted, “After all we've been through, we can handle it, I know it. Now we have Merle and Lumen here I am confident about it. These assholes don't stand a chance.” 

Merle nudged Lumen with his leg, and when she looked at him he mouthed ‘told you’ with a content smile and a glint in his eye. Tomorrow, he’ll have his brother back, he just knew it, he could feel it in his bones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :-) leave a review if you want


	3. Chapter 3

The camp was quiet all morning. Sleeping bags and blankets were already packed and everyone’s bags were being put in cars so if anything went wrong they could make the escape as quick as possible. Even after the night inside the relatively safe fences, everybody looked exhausted. Merle stretched the sore muscles of his arms, neck, and back, cracking some joints in the process, making loud popping sounds. It was the first night in what felt like forever when he could rest for this long and he felt like the past months were catching up, letting him know all his years. 

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath when a particularly sore muscle let itself be known. He didn’t mean to say it aloud, but it already escaped and when he checked to his side, sure enough, Lumens worried eyes were on him.

“Are you in pain? Do you need me to rub your back before we go in?” She asked concerned, eying the back of his neck and the shoulder he was kneading earlier. 

If this question came from anyone else there would be only one possible answer for him, one that would involve fucking or at least some pussy eating. After all those months together on the road though, Lumen knew all about his sore spots, and he wouldn’t be able to count how many times her practices hands helped him from hell of a pain. 

“I’m alright for now. I would appreciate it later though,” he said with a serious face to which she nodded.  


They were all getting ready to go inside now, nervousness was all around the place and at the moment even he didn’t have it in him to crack a smile. He just wanted this day to be over and like her, he wanted to know already. This was worse than waiting for the execution because then they didn’t have any hope. Now, on the other hand, hope was the only thing they had, and they didn’t want to let go of it for as long as they could. Rick suddenly appeared in front of them, one hand on his hip, the other scratching his beard.

“Listen, I know we didn’t quite hit it off yesterday. But I think we worked good together, so I was thinking-”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Merle cut him off, “whatever you were gonna say, save it for when we are actually in.” 

Rick looked from him to Lumen and after a moment he gave him a quick nod and turned to the others. “Alright listen up!” Rick’s voice made everyone else look up and at him, “we all know the plan if we do this right, we’ll have a roof over our heads tonight. You all know what to do. Now come on. I know we can do this.” He announced and then moved to get ready in front of the gate. “Ready?”

After confirmation from everybody, they all started to move. Rick, Glenn, Maggie, T-Dog, Merle, and Lumen burst into the other yard killing every walker in sight, while Hershel shut and locked the gate again and with the girls, Lori and Carl stayed back to make some noise and hopefully draw some of the dead to the fence to kill them there. 

It took some time but they managed to secure the area and even push inside. Surprisingly the inside was actually calmer. They got very lucky, because not only the block was locked away from the other parts of the prison, but they found two sets of keys in the guard post. 

Merle looked around and nudged Lumen side, a new level of hope shining in his eyes, “see that? I wonder what other parts of the prison stayed secured.”

And for the first time that day, they both smiled.  


_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Later on, they all chose their cells and called it a night. Tomorrow’s plan is to find the cafeteria and infirmary for the much-needed supplies and everybody needed their rest. 

Sitting on his cot Merle felt almost disturbingly at home. He chose a cell further away from everyone else and stayed there alone, thinking, not being able to sleep yet. Being so close made him edgy, he wanted to go and search the prison by himself, but he knew he couldn’t. He needed the others with him because alone, he wouldn’t make it far. He was working the possibilities around his mind when a feeling of being watched pulled him out of his thoughts.

“I’m here for that promised backrub. It’ll help with the pain and it’ll help you relax. You need to rest.” Lumen moved into the cell, dropped her bag on the floor and motioned for him to sit on the chair. Which he did, taking his shirt off. His back hurt and this was the most pleasant, and actually the only way to get rid of that pain.

“Oh really, why are _you_ not resting? You need it as much as I do,” he asked, turning around to give her a pointed look, “Hypocrite much? Where have you been hiding anyway?”

“Don’t move your head, I won’t be any help if you keep moving around.” He let out a quiet chuckle but did as he was told. She started to work on his sore muscles making him let out a deep content breath. “I’m not a hypocrite, I was talking to Lori for a bit, about the baby and how she's been doing,” she continued quietly while kneading a particularly tense knot in his shoulder, ”Then I went to my cell to prepare it for the night… But as much as I was looking forward to it, it’s just weird to have my own space after all this time. I feel like something is gonna jump me any minute. I don’t feel safe. Can I stay with you in your cell?”

“‘Course you can,” he answered through a moan as the knot loosen up and then groaned when she started to work on another one. “I’ll be on top,” he moaned again, feeling another knot loosen up. 

She didn’t do this very often. Not wanting to look weak, he didn’t like to show when he was in pain. But after some time on the road, when he ran out of drugs, it was inevitable that she would notice. The first time she offered to do it, he brushed her off. He always thought of a massage as a nice foreplay, and this was his brother's girl. He never had an actual massage which would actually help him. Once he tried it thought he discovered he felt like a new man the next day, and it lasted for awhile too. He never asked for it, but she usually caught him, just like she did this morning. And to be honest he was glad she did. After that first time, he never turned down the offer ever again.

A loud sound of someone clearing his throat made Lumen stop and they both looked at the door where they saw ...no one.

“What?” Merle barked, not happy at all about the interruption.

“I’m sorry,” they heard Rick’s voice, “I don’t want to- could you just keep it down? The sound carries here. And there are young ears listening.”

“The hell are you talking about?” Merle asked, standing up to go out of the cell, with Lumen right on his heels they found Rick leaning against the bars of the other cell, his hand shielding his eyes. He slowly took the hand off and carefully checked the state they were in. He looked a bit surprised to find Lumen fully clothed. 

“Oh God! I was giving him a massage! His back hurts sometimes!” She rolled her eyes, finally catching the meaning behind Rick’s comment.

Merle who now understood too shot a dirty look in Rick’s direction. He was not amused by anyone telling him what to do, or not to do. “Well now that we are all fucking clear here, let her do her job.” He took Lumen by her arm and started to drag her inside the cell.

“Wait! Wait a minute.” Rick stopped them. “That wasn’t why I came… originally.” He nervously scratched his beard, his eyes shifting around the cell before continuing. “Look I know we agreed that you two stay elsewhere, that we’ll stay out of each other’s way. But I think we worked good together. What I wanted to talk about with you this morning was that I wanted to have a talk with the rest of the group about you joining us. We did talk about it tonight, and you are welcome to stay here with us. If you follow our rules and will be helping how you’ve been so far, that is.”

Merle stared him down for a moment before turning the rest of his body around to fully face him. “Is that right? How nice of you!” He then glanced down at Lumen before looking back at Rick with a cold smile on his face. “How about you cut the crap. I say with your wife’s condition you just can’t let go of the only person with experience and knowledge of _human_ medicine. So stop acting all high and mighty like you would be doing us any favors. We fought to secure this place as much as you all did. I won’t be part of your little group, doing what you say when you say it, that’s for damn sure. There is a reason why my military status changed to an ex, you got me? I’m my own man. We’ll be better on our own.”

Rick looked at him, not knowing what to say for a moment before pointing at Lumen, “what about her? Do you decide everything for her? Doesn’t she have her own opinion?”

“Oh _she_ sure does!” Lumen cut in, “ _she_ can hear you just fine too and if _she_ didn’t agree with Merle here, _she_ could tell you on her own, but thanks for asking,” she huffed and then grabbed Merle’s arm and tugged for him to follow, “Come on, I’ll do the other shoulder. Goodnight Rick,” she ended the conversation, no longer looking at the man.

Merle’s grin couldn’t get any bigger. It was great to have her annoyance directing at someone else. Maybe it would be worth staying with the group, just for this. “You heard the lady, now git!” he uttered over his shoulder when he saw Rick still standing there, staring at them, looking somewhat conflicted. 

Rick honestly didn’t know what to say, he actually did think they would be doing them a favor. More people means more security. But the fact was he did hope and in the back of his mind, he even started to count on Lumen’s help with the delivery. Now he couldn’t shake the feeling that he fucked up the fragile truce they established with the odd pair. Deciding he won’t be able to do anything about it right now, he said good night and reluctantly left.

Lumen had returned to work afterward but she just couldn’t keep her head on the task. 

“Damn! Easy there! You know you are supposed to be helping me, not making it worse.”

“Sorry.” she let go of his shoulder which she was kneading just a bit too roughly. “I’m just-sorry, I should have paid more attention. My thoughts are just all over the place.”

“You don’t say.” He suppressed a chuckle but didn’t say anything else when he felt her knuckles on his spine. This was his favorite part. It didn’t hurt at all, and let him feel a little light headed afterward. Since he quit the drugs, meaning he ran out of them and couldn’t find any which had led to the detox of his life, well since then this was his only high. And he enjoyed immensely. 

“Can you believe this?” Lumen complained quietly behind him. “Is it that hard to simply say, ‘hey, we could use more help, could you please stick around?’ Isn’t there any courtesy left in the world? And what was that about my opinion? The nerve of this man. I can be quiet and have an opinion on things at the same time. You know what? I don’t like him. Something doesn't sit well with me about him.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t say this to piss you off even more, but you are the worse judge of character I’ve ever met, so your _‘something doesn’t sit well with me’_ doesn’t worth shit. On the contrary, if he gives you creeps, he’s probably the most normal guy on the planet.”

“Ha, ha, fucking ha. _You_ gave me creeps when I first met you and you are a creep!”

“What was that? Excuse me, was that a swear word I heard? You kiss my brother with that mouth?”

“Oh no, you can’t change the topic that easily, you can’t deny I was right about you.”

“About what, that I am a creep? I’m not denying anything, but I have you know I am a creep you are giving a massage to, so I can’t be _that_ bad, right?” He turned to look at her, eyebrows raised, smirk plastered on his face.

“But you are.” She took her hands off him, she looked around to find his shirt, and once she located it she grabbed it and threw it at him. “I just became a master in ignoring that about you.” 

“Ouch, I’m hurt.” He mocked while pulling the shirt on.

“I bet you are, my heart is bleeding for you. Now come on, let’s go to sleep.”

“Hey, you remember I’m not the one who pissed you off, right? What’s up with you?” Now that he was actually looking at her, he saw her flushed face and nervous fidgeting. 

“It’s nothing really.” She tried to downplay her worries. 

He moved to stand right beside her, leaning against the metal construction. “Come on, don’t give me that shit. You’ve been on edge since yesterday. Talk to me Lumen. Is it the group? They make you nervous?”

“No, it’s not the group, not really.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “It’s Daryl,” she chanced a quick glance at Merle and seeing his confused expression she cut her eyes down, and while staring at the floor she continued. “I’m not sure how to explain this well, it’s just, I was so focused on getting here. Before that, I didn’t really think about anything else and the closer we got the more I started to think about what will happen next, and it’s been so long since we saw him, since he saw me and-I don’t know. I just keep thinking about how we never really spend much time together outside of this damn prison. What if he won’t feel the same way anymore. What about all these people with us? Will they be safe? Just yesterday I thought about how in all this time, I’ve never talked with either of you about his-about what-I don’t-”

“-Alright, alright, come here.” He stopped her rumbling which didn’t make much sense to him anyway. He pulled her to his chest, patting the back of her head. “Take a deep breath and let it out. There’s a good girl,” he rumbled quietly. He heard her sniffle, but she didn’t seem to be crying. “You worry too much. But for the record, there is no way my brother would ever stop feeling whatever it is he feels for you, because, sweetheart, I know the man all his life, I changed his diapers for Christ's sake, and I never ever saw him act around anyone the way he acts around you. It’s like you’re his personal tranquilizer. _That’s_ creepy if you ask me. And for the rest, how about we think about that once we actually find him!” He felt her take several deep breaths before she tried again.

“But-”

“-No buts,” he cut her off, “We’ll be alright, everything will be alright. I promise.” He didn’t want to get into a conversation about the other issues. He wasn’t even sure if he’d have the right answers or any answers for that matter. So instead he kept petting her until he felt her starting to calm down.  
He directed her to bottom cot then. “I want you to stay here tomorrow. Ah, ah, ah I’m not finished.” He pointed at her when he saw she was about to protest. “It will be harder than the yard, we’ll be in the corridors and there is no saying what we’ll find there. And I’m not saying you are not capable because you are. But with the state of mind you are in, I don’t want to take any chances and I won’t be able to focus if I’ll keep checking on you. So be good and stay here with the others, alright?”

“Okay.” She eventually agreed in a whisper. 

“Good, now let's get some sleep.” He urged her to her bed before he climbed on the top cot. After the massage and this talk he was more than ready to get some shut eye, his edginess somewhat settled. 

“Merle?” He heard her quietly call for him after few minutes. 

“Yeah?” He grunted half asleep.

“Thank you.”

“Anytime.”  


_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The search the following day went south rather quickly and Merle was more than happy about his decision to have Lumen to stay behind. The corridors were full of walkers, Maggie and Glenn got separated and before they found them, the old man got bitten. 

Merle cursed under his breath when they laid him down and Rick started to chop his leg off, to try to avoid him turning. _Well, at least they seem to find the damn cafeteria_. He thought to look around when his eyes caught the unfamiliar faces watching the scene, all unfamiliar but one.

“I’ll be damned! Never thought I’d be so glad to see your nigger ass!” He laughed, standing up and going toward the kitchen. “Do you know where my brother is?”

Oscar, who couldn’t take his eyes from the bleeding man on the ground didn’t answer right away, but he didn’t have to.

“Who the hell are you?” One of the other prisoners asked, eying the scene in front of him through the barred window.

“Merle?” And there he was, his not so little brother, coming through the door with Oscar following on his heels. Merle reached for him and grabbing the back of his neck. He pulled him to his chest and breathed deeply in relief. He slipped Daryl a second gun he was carrying just in case before putting his free hand on Oscar’s shoulder in greeting. He almost forgot what was happening around him when Rick’s shouts pulled him back.

“Hey! He’s bleeding out! Maggie put pressure on the knee. Hard, hard! Push, push.” He looked frantically around him, “we gotta get him back!”

All the prisoners now started to come out of the kitchen, looking utterly confused. Looking between Oscar, Daryl, Merle, and the rest of the people on the ground around the injured man. They didn’t quite know what to make of all of it.

“What happened to him?” One of the prisoners asked.

“He got bit,” Merle said, not letting go of his brother. 

“Bit?” Another one asked looking even more confused. They all looked at Rick, who was fighting to save the man.

“I need you to hold this.” Rick instructed Maggie, who was barely holding it together, but she gave him a shaky ‘okay’ and did what he asked. “As hard as you can,” he said, his eyes drilling in hers to get across how important that is.

“Yes.” She sounded a little bit more confident and held the rags to the wound. But no matter how hard she pressed them it looked like the blood just kept flowing everywhere.

Glenn then stood up, hurrying into the kitchen. “You have medical supplies?” 

One of the prisoners took a gun out, pointing it at Glenn, “where do you think you're going?” When it didn’t stop him he turned the gun on Merle.

Daryl pushed Merle off and pointed his own gun at the dumbass with a revolver and hissed, “put it down asshole, or I’ll put you down.” Merle followed Daryl’s lead, T-Dog too, although his eyes kept jumping to Daryl nervously.

“Fuck you, you don’t tell me what to do!” The prisoner threw back, but seeing all the guns pointed at him, he reluctantly pointed his to the ground.

“Who the hell are you people, anyway? Don't look like no rescue team.” Another voice asked.

Rick looked at all of them while waiting on Glenn. “If a rescue team is what you're waiting for, don't.” At that moment Glenn emerged from the kitchen with a metal table on wheels and Rick urged him on, “come on, we gotta go! Now! Come on! I need a hand here.” They took a hold on Hershel from each side and Rick countdown for the lift, “One, two, three, go!” And then they moved quickly to the door, “T, the door,” he yelled while pushing the table in front of him.

The shocked prisoners found their voices again then, “are you crazy? Don't open that!” 

To which T-Dog shouted, “We got this!” And opened it. Immediately first snarling walker stumbled in but before he got further into the room, T-Dog pinned it against the wall and shove a stick through its brain. The body hit the ground and Rick, Maggie and Glenn pushed the table into the corridor.

“The fuck?” Daryl murmured when they disappeared out of site. Merle didn’t give him an answer, instead, he dragged him in for another half hug slapping him on the back.

“Come on, let’s head back, I’ll explain everything later.” He motioned for him and Oscar to follow while keeping his gun pointed at the others. When they tried to follow too he shouted, “you fuckers stay here or you’ll get a bullet in the head, we clear?” He saw the guy's arm, the one holding the revolver, twitch and pointed his gun directly at his head. “Try me asshole.” The guy’s eyes flicked to Daryl, he looked pissed but he didn’t move, and he silently watched them leave.

“Lumen?” Daryl asked when they were out of the room. The corridor was cleaned by Rick and others and they managed to walk through without any problems.

“Yeah I got her, she’s waiting in the cell block. Although now with the old man playing on world war one I bet she’ll have her hands full.” He answered with a smile. A smile that dropped when Oscar asked about his family.

“Hey you got a cell I could use to call my wife?” Oscar asked

“Fuck.” Merle muttered, not really knowing how to explain to the man his family is gone. He knew very well Oscar was in the same prison as Daryl. He just never really thought about him after he and Lumen found his family dead. “Sorry man, there are no phones anymore, no nothing. We did go to your house, but it was too late.”

“What are you talking about? Too late for what?” 

He didn’t get an answer to that.

When they eventually got to the cell block Rick, T-Dog and Glenn were waiting for them. Maggie was watching from the other side of the locked bars. Rick’s face looked troubled and Merle could understand why. He didn’t care though, he was just happy to have his brother by his side. He felt like all the weight of the world was lifted from his shoulders. He rubbed his hands together contently. 

“Who’s this?” Daryl asked calmly beside him.

Merle turned to introduce Rick. “Me and Lumen met these nice people outside of the prison, we cleared out the yard and this cell block together. We have a deal with them.” He pointedly looked at Rick. “We help each other to secure the place and then we’ll all mind our own business. Isn’t that right, _Rick_?” He couldn’t help the mocking tone. This was just too entertaining.

“That deal was for you and Lumen, we didn’t make a deal about convicts joining you.” Rick said in a stern tone.

Merle’s eyes darkened. “But it’s not up to you to decide who will or will not join me and Lumen now is it?”

Rick seems to have an internal fight with himself. “You can’t just expect me to let a bunch of convicts sleep beside us.” His eyes jumped to where Maggie was standing in knee-jerk reaction, it was unintentional but it showed his thoughts and the message clearly.

“You let _me_ sleep beside you yesterday and the day before that just fine.” Merle let the information sink in. He too has been convicted, even though he was an ex-convict there isn’t much of a difference. “Besides, I don’t give a shit about the others back there. We can go and kill them right now for all I care. And these two ain’t here for no rape if that’s what you are worried about.”

Daryl cleared his throat. “Doesn’t matter no more what we are in here for. From what I see around and from what my brother here told us, I’d say the world as we knew it doesn't exist no more.” He glanced at Merle. “Let’s just get Lumen and then we’ll decide what we’ll do.” His eyes checking on Oscar who didn’t seem to be really present since he asked about his family, his mind working all the new information, but he seemed to be holding himself together. “Lead the way,” Daryl said and they all started to move. 

Rick raised his gun then, “No! Stop, I can’t let you just walk in there.”

Daryl raised his right back, “oh yeah? What are you gonna do about it?”

Instead of Rick’s answer, they heard a sound of keys rattling in the lock. Rick’s head turned so fast it seemed like he might hurt it. Daryl looked to the bars, along with everybody else, and there she was. With her hands and clothes all bloody and filthy he was reminded of the last day he saw her while still being a free man. It was almost poetic.

She looked around nervously, “Please, there is no need for this, all of you need to calm down so we can figure how to make this work peacefully, alright?” She addressed each one of them while eying all the guns that were being slowly put down one by one before her gaze fixed on Daryl. 

“I’m calm,” he said lazily. When she didn’t go to him right away for a millisecond a thought flashed through his brain that maybe she’s scared now that there is no glass between them like it was when she visited, but he brushed it off. Instead, he urged her on. 

“It’s okay darling, come here.” He reached his hand out as if for her to take it even though she was across the room. And she started to move then, slowly at first but then she speeded up. Their bodies collided and she hugged him tightly. Her fists were gripping his shirt tightly like he would disappear if she let go. All of her worries momentarily forgotten under the waves of relief and joy flooding through her veins. 

“I knew it, I knew we’d find you.” He heard her mumbling to his neck. She started to shake and he knew she was crying. He hugged her even tighter to his body, shutting out the world around him and enjoying the absolute bliss of the heavenly feeling he only had when she was near him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :-) leave a review if you want


	4. Chapter 4

The tension in the room was so thick one would need a knife to cut through it. Everybody was quietly watching the couple, and although this should be a happy moment the general mood in the room was anything but happy. Glenn and T-Dog have been exchanging nervous glances since the moment the three men came into the room, not sure if they should leave the negotiation to Rick or if they should interfere. 

Rick was painfully aware of the fact that his group was outnumbered. Not really by numbers but by strength. He didn’t get a good look at how many people actually were in the cafeteria, but he heard the voices. There were most likely at least five of them, maybe more. And these people were convicts, they couldn’t have been trusted prior the apocalypse, even less now. He didn’t feel this angry and helpless since the farm, since Shane. 

He knew he fucked up. Deep down he felt it from the moment he met Merle and Lumen, he knew something was off, alarm bells at the back of his mind rang like crazy, but he buried that feeling because he was actually glad they’ve met someone with medical training and someone who looked like he could help protect the group. Then when they managed to make it inside of the prison he let that feeling go completely, let his guard down and offered them a place among them. Which they threw right back in his face and now he knew why. They weren’t looking for a group, they were on a rescue mission for their own family. 

At this moment he didn’t feel in control at all, but he had to do his best to not let it show. He didn’t know what to do though. He didn’t know what to say, he didn’t even know where to start with some kind of negotiation. He and his group needed this place. Hershel was hurt, Lori was due to deliver any day now and all of them were exhausted. He looked at Lumen clinging to the guy, Daryl, who apparently was Merle’s brother. His face seemed familiar but he couldn’t place him. It’s unlikely he’d remember him from giving him a speeding ticket. He would be lucky to have that good of a memory. 

Suddenly as if he felt the attention Daryl’s eyes opened and he turned his head in his direction. Gone was the warm, welcoming expression he had worn when addressing Lumen. His eyes were cold as ice, emotionless. Rick broke the eye contact and looked behind him to Merle and was startled when he was met with yet another hard stare directed right at him. For some reason, he didn’t expect it but it seemed like Merle was watching Rick, Glenn, and T-Dog while his brother had his moment with Lumen. The black guy seemed to come out of his grieving bubble when she showed up. He watched them for few moments and then with a sad small smile he said.

“Hey girl, you have one of those hugs for me?” Her head shot up at hearing his voice.

“Oscar!” She untangled herself from Daryl and while quickly wiping happy tears off her face she went to hug him too. Daryl and Merle could hear her talk to him, but her voice was too low for the others to hear. “We went for Marley and the kids, but it was too late, it was a mess. I’m so sorry!”

He nodded jerkily. “Merle told me. Thank you for trying though.” 

She squeezed him one more time before she let go of him and moved back to Daryl whose arm circled around her waist instantly and pinned her body to his. 

Daryl didn’t know these people and he didn’t know what was really waiting for them out there so he left the talking to his brother. It came naturally, Merle was always the one doing the talking.

“Since this seems to be going fucking nowhere, how about we," Merle motioned to him and Lumen, "will take our stuff. Then we all go to talk to the nice gentlemen waiting in the cafeteria. You," he made an imaginary line between Rick, Glenn and T-Dog with his finger, "will go with us and you will help us clear the other cellblock so you wouldn't be so worried about sleeping next to us. And then we'll stay out of each other's way. Just like we agreed on. I make a deal I keep a deal. How about you, Rick?” 

Rick gritted his teeth. He didn’t feel like there was a right answer to this. He didn't feel like he really had a say in all this either. The pressure was starting to get to the point where it was too much to handle. Glenn shot another unsure glance T-Dog’s way. The situation didn’t look good and honestly, Glenn didn’t find what Merle was offering that bad. Despite his weird remarks Merle worked good with them, maybe they could make it work with the rest of the men too. But before he came to a decision if to interfere or not Maggie spoke up from the direction of the barred door through which Lumen came from earlier.

“Guys, my dad isn’t doing so good, Lumen,” she turned to Lumen as she addressed her, “we need you here, please,” she said a little shakily, motioning behind her, where Hershel was lying.

Lumen looked at her bloody hands as if she forgotten for a moment where the blood came from. “Yeah, yes of course.” She made a move to go to Maggie but the arm around her kept her in place. She looked up to see Daryl’s frowning face and felt torn. 

When they first brought Hershel in she didn’t pay much attention to what’s going around her, she focused on stopping the bleeding. She heard the shouting later but it wasn’t until she heard Daryl’s voice that it registered fully that they found him. She couldn’t do much more at the moment without the bandages and other stuff so she quickly instructed Lori to what needed to be done for the time being and went to him. She needed to see him with her own eyes. Now she didn’t want to leave him again, but at the same time she was the only one who had any real chance to help Hershel, and when you are the only one who can you just have to.

“Daryl let go, it’s okay, I-” 

“No,” he grunted cutting her off before she managed to really say anything.

“Just take him with you.” Maggie tried to offer, making Rick turn to her. 

He pointed his forefinger at her. “Maggie, let me handle this, we can’t-”

“-Are you serious?” She didn’t let him finish, “my dad is bleeding out and you just stand here nursing your hurt ego. So what if he’s a convict, for all we know he can be here for stealing cars or something.” Her eyes began to water while seeking some backup. “Glenn.” 

“I agree with Maggie Rick, this is not the time for this.” Glenn tried, his eyes jumping nervously between all the people in the room.

“Alright everybody,” Merle’s voice rang out through the tension of the room, “Rick, calm your shit, nobody is going to hurt anybody so calm the fuck down and let Lumen work. Sweetheart, you go on to help the old man, take Daryl with you so he can watch what a great nurse you became.” 

She didn’t wait for Rick’s approval, she just grabbed Daryl’s hand and this time he let her lead him to the bars where Maggie was waiting, relieved expression on her face. 

Daryl smirked at Rick when they passed him, it was too brief for anyone to notice really. Anyone but Rick who watched them go, and although he looked like he was about to have a stroke he didn’t try to stop them.

Lumen went directly to the cell, while Daryl stayed close to the bars so he could see what’s happening on both sides. He looked around to see a kid with a big ass hat and in the cell two girls and one _pregnant_ woman fussing around the old man. No wonder the guy was having a little meltdown over having convicts for a neighbor. This group wouldn’t have stood a chance against them. 

“Now, try to think and think hard,” Merle continued, pulling Rick's attention back to him, “what I’m giving you is one hell of a deal. Nobody needs to get hurt. It doesn’t need to get ugly. I know you want our help so man the fuck up and stick to the damn deal!”

Rick was silent for a moment. He thought about Lori, their relationship was edgy, to say the least, but he’d still do anything to help her deliver the baby as safely as possible, and in this moment Lumen was the best shot they’ve got. He looked around at Glenn, T-Dog, Daryl leaning against the frame of the bars, Oscar, before he refocused his troubled eyes on Merle, “Okay then, let's say we do this. What about the others at the cafeteria, can they be trusted? Do you know them?”

“No,” Merle answered a little confused, “what's your point? I don't know you either. Ain’t that why we are making some sort of a deal in the first place?" 

Oscar’s big frame shifted further in the room, “we know them, I mean we did spend more time with them in that cafeteria than I’m comfortable with. I’m not saying they’re saints but we were under an agreement and it worked. We all stuck to it,” he looked at Daryl for confirmation of his statement. When he got an affirmative grumble and an almost not noticeable nod he continued, “I think we can make some sort of deal just fine.” 

Daryl nodded and turned his attention back to the cellblock where Lumen was working on the old man’s leg. He was a lost case in Daryl’s opinion and she looked accordingly frustrated. Without thinking he moved closer to the cell and at his approach he was met with three pairs of scared eyes. He stopped outside of the cell disregarding the other women and focused on Lumen.

“I could help.” He offered. She looked up with a small smile. 

“No, I’m okay for now. The bleeding has slowed down quite a bit, but it didn’t stop yet. There is not much I can do without antibiotics and painkillers, some sterile gauze would be nice too.” She obviously didn’t catch the meaning of what he said. He meant a different kind of help entirely but he wasn’t about to elaborate with the others listening. 

“There is an infirmary...” He stated instead, trailing off at the feeling of another eyes on him. He turned to find the kid staring at him. He didn’t look away when Daryl met his gaze, the kid narrowed his eyes but didn’t budge. They stared at each other for a moment, _he doesn’t look scared at all, interesting. Looks like the only one here with some balls is this little fella_. The thought brought a smirk on Daryl’s face. 

“Nice hat,” Daryl grumbled eventually.

“It was my dad’s, he gave it to me,” the kid said. 

“You don’t say. Is that your dad?” Daryl asked, pointing at Rick who was now hovering in the entrance, the boy was about to say something, but the conversation was interrupted by Merle’s laugh. It looked like the men in the other room all came closer to the bars while he was chatting with Lumen. Merle slapped his hand on Rick’s shoulder, still chuckling. 

“Is that why are you so nervous, _officer_? You worry you’ll meet some old friends here?” Rick gave him the evil eye, making Merle laugh some more. “I’m just fucking with you, it doesn't matter none what you were before, _ain’t that right, officer_.” Merle emphasized the last part and with a final harsh slap he let go of his shoulder, sure he made his point.

Rick didn’t comment, instead informed his group, “Okay, listen up, we are going to talk to the rest of the survivors, see if we can agree on some kind of arrangement. Maggie,” he pointed to the girl, “I want you to stay here this time.” 

She nodded in agreement immediately. It was clear he gave the instruction mostly for her protection and she preferred to stay with her father anyway. When she moved back to the cell Rick motioned for Glenn to go to him.

“Do not leave his side. If he dies, you need to be there for that,” Rick told him quietly, “You think you can do this? Maggie will be there,” he asked when he didn’t get more than a nod from him.

“I got it.” Glenn voiced his confirmation.

“I can ask T,” Rick offered 

“I got it,” Glenn said again with more resolution.

“Good.”

“Okay then,” Merle clapped his hands together, after watching the exchange, “Let's get going.”

Just then they all heard some noise coming from the room. Merle turned around to see the rest of the prisoners emerging from the hall and reached for his gun immediately and charged with Daryl hot on his heels while Rick motioned for the girls to stay hidden before he T-Dog and Oscar joined them.

“Don’t shoot, don’t shoot!” The man with a mustache shouted out. “Please, don’t shoot! We don’t mean any harm, we just wanna know what the hell is going on!  


_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It took some arguing, a little bit of threatening, but in the end, they all agreed to be civil for the time being. Tomas tried again to gain some control but he soon realized only Andrew was ready to back him up. Daryl, his brother, and Oscar seemed to be siding with the new group, and that meant that Axel along with Big Tiny are going to side with them too. So he decided to go with the flow for now. 

“Why don’t you take him to the hospital?” Tomas asked, his hand still clutching the pistol although he kept it pointed to the ground. 

“How long have you been locked in here? Do you know anything at all about what’s happening?” Rick answered with a question, his eyes shifting from one man to another. 

“Going on like 10 months.” Tomas said, his eyes shifting around the room.

“A riot broke out. Never seen anything like it,” Big Tiny added.

“Attica on speed, man,” Axel said quietly.

“Ever heard about dudes going cannibal, dying, coming back to life? Crazy.” Andrew joined.

“One guard looked out for us, locked us up in the cafeteria. Told us to sit tight, threw me this piece,” Tomas waived with the gun, “said he'd be right back.”

“Yeah, and that was 292 days ago,” Oscar said, frowning. 

“94 according to my calcula-”

“-Shut up!” Tomas cut off Axle who attempted to correct Oscar’s number.

Oscar then continued “We were thinking that the army or the national guard should be showing up any day now.”

“There is no army,” Rick said.

“What do you mean?” Andrew asked, looking as confused as the rest of the prisoners. 

“There's no government, no hospitals, no police. It's all gone.” Rick elaborated a bit.

All of them went quiet, mulling all the information over in their heads.

“For real?” Axel asked in disbelief after few minutes.

Rick looked him straight in the eyes. “I'm serious. As far as we can see at least half the population has been wiped out. Probably more.”

Tomas shook his head, “Ain’t no way”

“See for yourself,” Rick motioned for all of them to follow him outside. 

“Wait!” Lumen called from the cellblock, “wait a minute,” she said as she hurried to Daryl’s side carrying a crossbow. She handed it to him when she was close enough. “Here, thought you should have it before you all go out there.” Daryl took it from her, examining the bow and when he saw it was in really good condition he cracked a smile.

“Thanks, darling.” He reached for her and pulled her to him for a quick peck on her lips. He didn’t want to leave her side but knew it was for the best and ushered her back. 

“Hey, how many people do you have there? Any pretty blondes for me?” Tomas asked eyeing Lumen’s ass as she walked back to the cellblock where Glenn shut and locked the door behind her.

Rick stepped into his line of vision. “none of your business! Now move.”

And he did. Merle started to follow but Daryl caught his arm to stop him, beckoning him to come closer.

“I want that fucker dead.” He said quietly only for Merle to hear.

Merle eyed him for a moment to see just how serious he was. “Daryl, Lumen is a beautiful woman, even with all the blood and mud covering her. You can’t kill people just for noticing that. Hell, if I was to be shot for every time I voice my appreciation of a beautiful girl I’d look like strainer by now.” 

Daryl’s only reply was a hard stare. When Merle saw that it was as serious as it gets he sighed. “Alright, I won’t miss that asshole none, just wait for the right time.”

“Don’t I always?” Daryl drawled, “I waited 10 fucking months, I didn’t want to risk them others ganging up on me but now, I want him dead. I can wait few more days but it will happen.” 

Merle didn’t say anything right away, but he held Daryl back from the others when they got out to the yard. He watched him take in the scene. In that moment, for the first time in his life, he allowed himself to admit that there is something very wrong with his brother and that Lumen’s fears for the group maybe weren't much off the mark. Because whilst all the other prisoners looked around with stunned expressions, trying to take it all in, Daryl was looking around with the calmest expression he ever saw on him. He looked content. 

“Hey, Daryl,” he waited until he got his brother's full attention, “you know I always looked the other way, but things are different now. This group is not half bad and with them, creepers walking around it sure comes handy to have some manpower. What I’m saying is… Hell, you know exactly what I’m saying... just don’t.”

Daryl narrowed his eyes at him, the content look vanishing from his face. He eyed Merle for a moment and then with a grunt he walked off.

 _Well, at least I tried._ Merle thought and followed after Daryl to join the group in the middle of the yard. They were talking and as he came closer he realized they are talking about the crimes the prisoners were convicted of. He came just as Andrew started to list his crimes, it was all about drugs, possession, selling, stealing, _damn!_ The guy looked like fucking amateur but at this moment Merle would give his left ball for some crystal.

“Tax fraud,” Tomas stated after Andrew was done with his never ending list, making the group go silent.

“No way you are here for that.” T-Dog was first to talk with the look of disbelief. 

Rick searched all the faces, the convicts probably knew between them what every one of them did. But nobody said a word or indicated in any way if what Tomas said was true, so he dropped it. 

“How about you, Daryl?” He turned to the only person who hasn't yet said his crime.

“Me? Storage and disposing of hazardous waste.” He deadpanned. Merle turned to him, fighting off the laugh that crept to get out.

“You got a prison sentence for that? Jesus, how much waste was it.” Rick looked around confused as if he was checking what type of prison this was. 

“Fucking plenty,” Daryl growled. 

“Okay then,” Rick backpedaled. He checked all the faces but yet again, none of them made a comment. Only Axel looked edgy but then again, he looked like he was on edge all the time. Not a hero type for sure. He realized this conversation won’t put much of a light on what kind of people these guys were. He knew they were most likely lying but there wasn’t much he could do to make them tell the truth. 

“Let’s talk about how we do this. Merle here and I made a deal before we got here and now we want to extend the offer to you.” Rick said, briefly checking Merle’s face to see if he’s still with him. When he received a nod he continued. “We could all work together to make this place safe. What we are proposing is that we help you to clear another cellblock. We split whatever is left in that cafeteria and anything else we’ll find here and then we all stay out of each other way. That sound good to you?”

They all exchanged long looks before Tomas spat out, “Fucking peachy!” And with that they all turned to go back to the prison and to work.  


_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Couple hours later Lumen was checking Hershel’s pulse, it didn’t look so good, and the men had yet returned. She looked behind her to find Beth’s big eyes on her, so much hope in them it made her look away, back to her patient. She wasn’t very optimistic. She hadn’t much to work with in the first place, even if she managed to stop the bleeding completely, the infection will surely take over and finish him, it will be painful and he will be suffering needlessly. Her dark line of thoughts was interrupted with a loud thud next to her.

“What is this?” She asked looking at the bag on the ground 

“Check it out,” Carl said from above her, looking very proud of himself. Lumen opened the bag only to find it full of medical supplies. She looked back at Carl with a smile as a relief washed over her. She hadn't won the fight yet, but now at least she’s got something to work with. She took the bag and went to work. She heard them arguing behind her, but she didn’t waste her time on arguing. It was risky what he did, but if the old man will actually survive this, it will be because of what Carl did just now. It wasn’t her place to jump in and comment, so she focused on Hershel’s leg. She was so focused on her task she didn’t even notice when he stopped breathing. She was almost done with the bandages when a force of habit made her check his face where she saw he lost more color. Her eyes slid down to his non-moving chest. Just then Beth cried out.

“He’s not breathing!”

“Shit,” Lumen muttered. She looked around her quickly to find Lori’s face the least panicked. “Lori are you familiar with the CPR?” Lori nodded quickly and moved closer to the bunk. “Alright then, I’ll count the compression, I’ll make three you’ll breathe in on my signal breathe, got it? Okay.” She put her hands on Hershel’s chest. “Ready? One, two, three, breathe! One, two, three, breathe! One, two, thre...” 

They continued like that for two minutes or so, those two minutes felt like a century for all of them. Maggie was buried in Glenn’s arms sobbing, his eyes were trained on what’s going on in the cell, ready to keep his promise. Amy grabbed Beth’s hand, trying to reassure her, not having very much faith herself. Carl was clutching to the bars his huge eyes not leaving his mother. But finally, Hershel took a breath on his own, making all of them jump in fright before they realized the resuscitation was successful. 

“Oh God.” Lori breathed out, locking eyes with Lumen. They shared a relieved smile and Lumen went quickly to check the bleeding after the CPR. Once she saw that all looked good enough she turned back to Lori.

“Let’s not do that again,” she said with a little laugh, watching Beth crawl around her to sit next to her dad before focusing back on Lori. “How are you feeling? Any changes?” She asked pointing to Lori’s belly. 

“No, still nothing.” She shook her head.

“It will be alright, it’s all the stress. You know what? Try to get some sleep tonight and tomorrow after you rest a bit I could give you a relaxing massage. It could help.”

“You know how? I thought you were a nurse.”

“I took a course and did it as a side job before all this happened. I don’t want to brag, but I think I’m actually really good at it.”

“She sure is, that woman has golden hands. Be grateful she offered her services.” Merle’s voice echoed through the cellblock. “But not now, come on, sweetheart, we are leaving.”

“What do you mean leaving? Leaving where?” Lumen asked as she stood up.

“We cleared the other cellblock. Rick and his people are staying here, we are taking the other one. I’ll grab our things and we are going.”

“Oh, okay. Hey wait, what about Hershel?” She called after him, making him walk several steps back.

“What about him? Is there anything you need to do now?”

“Well no but-”

“But nothing, you helped them enough, leave them with some instructions if you must but we are leaving now. That’s the deal. Daryl and Oscar are waiting outside and I’m not gonna be explaining to Rick why we are breaking our agreement right from the start. Because, sweetheart, Daryl won't budge until he gets you.” 

Lumen sighed, there wasn’t anything she could do for Hershel at the moment, he was right. They had to leave. It wasn’t that she wanted to spend the night at Hershel’s side so badly. He seemed to have plenty of people ready to help. It was that she really wasn’t looking forward to living with the bunch in the other cellblock. She saw some of them when she brought Daryl his crossbow and they didn’t look very friendly, or to be more accurate, the two watching her looked like they wanted to get too much friendly.

At the same time she trusted Merle’s judgment and if he thought it was okay, then it was. So she grabbed the pills and crouched down to where Beth was sitting, now with Amy next to her. Lumen briefly thought that she never actually heard the girl talk, but she quickly refocused on what needed to be done. She handed Beth the two bottles.

“Take this, if he doesn’t wake up on his own till the nightfall do your best to wake him up to take these. This one is for pain, the other is antibiotics to prevent an infection, okay?”

“Yeah I got it.”

“You give him more in the morning, then during the day. We’ll try to keep it in eight ish hours intervals. If the blood leaks through the bandages don’t panic right away, it doesn’t nece-.”

“I know,” Beth gave her small smile. “I’ve been helping my dad with the animals for some time before… this, before all this happened.”

“Alright then.” Lumen was relieved she seems to know at least something. She looked at Amy who’s eyes were glued to Hershel. “I’ll be going then. If anything changes just come get me, I don’t care what the big boys say, if I will be able to help, I will.” 

“Thank you,” Beth said before nestling herself next to her dad. 

Lumen stood up again and exited the cell where Lori was waiting for her. “Hey, what’s up with Amy?” Lumen whispered, “Is she alright?”

“Is any of us?” Lori laughed without humor in it.

“No, I mean she’s always so quiet.”

“Not always, she talks to Beth. She talks to the rest of us if necessary, but since we lost her sister before the winter she’s pretty closed off.”

“I see…” Not knowing what else to say to that, she just waited for Merle who was on his way to them.

“All ready?” He asked when he reached her.

“Yes.”

“Good, let’s go.” He nodded his goodbye to Lori and to the men carrying food inside, and with that, they left the cellblock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I’m sorry for the wait but this chapter was major pain in the ass, and I just couldn’t get it right, but now it’s finally done.
> 
> Merry Christmas and in case I won’t manage to post next week Happy New Year :-)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Leave a comment if you want :-)


	5. Chapter 5

“Where are you going?” Lumen asked Merle when he walked to the stairs instead of turning to the corridor leading to the other cellblock.

“They’re waiting outside, Daryl’s stuff is still in the truck. We’re gonna get it first.”

“Right,” she muttered and followed after him. “Are we going to move the truck closer?”

“Yeah, that’s the plan, Rick’s gonna do the same with their cars.”

When they opened the door leading to the yard they found Oscar sitting on the staircase and Daryl leaning against the wall at the bottom.

“Damn the sun feels good!” Oscar whispered, his eyes closed whilst he was bathing his face in sun rays. 

“Yeah, it’s a damn paradise, move your ass so we can go down.” Merle nudged Oscar’s shoulder with his boot. 

“Can’t a man enjoy a minute of-”

“-Move!” Daryl tugged impatiently at Oscar’s arm to get him out of the way, cutting off whatever he was about to say.

“Alright, alright, I’m moving.” Oscar exclaimed in mock annoyance as he stood up and walked down the last few steps. Merle and Lumen followed.

When they all got to the bottom Merle and Oscar started in the direction of the truck and she shifted to Daryl’s side. She was exhausted and was about to lean against him but stopped herself. Now that all her emotions from all the events were somewhat in check, she felt a little bit insecure about how to approach him. Should she take his hand, sneak her arm around his waist, or let him have his space? She didn’t know. They have touched each other plenty during the time they lived together, but it was always more or less in a sexual manner. Has he ever touched her without a ‘let’s fuck’ following right after? It felt like those times were ages ago. Suddenly a sad realization of how little they actually got to know each other washed over her. Sure, they talked a lot during their visitations, but you can’t really get to know someone like that-

“What is it?” Daryl interrupted her line of thought. 

“Nothing!” She uttered way too quickly for it to sound anywhere close to the truth. She cleared her throat and tried again calmer this time. “Nothing, just me being stupid.”

“Sure,” he snorted, “that sure sounded like nothing.” Seeing the battle of emotions on her face he knew she was full of shit. 

She moved then, too tired to try to figure out anything at all. She leaned towards him and rested her forehead against his chest. She placed one hand on his side and the other she slid up the sling until it reached his hand with which he was holding in to keep the crossbow in place on his shoulder.

“It really is nothing, I’m tired, and hungry, and worried, and-” She stopped to take a deep breath to calm herself, she let it out slowly and whispered. “It so strange, after all this time I’m able to touch you and suddenly I don’t know how.”

He took a moment to process what she said. He put the thought to rest earlier but it kept nagging at him, it bothered him that she seemed nervous around him. He wanted her to be at ease with him like she used to be. So he put his free arm around her back and kissed the top of her head, keeping his lips against her he muttered in her hair, “You can touch me however you want, darling.”

“Hey! You two coming?” Merle yelled from the gate where he and Oscar were waiting. “You know I’m glad to see you, brother, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna be your bellboy! Come and get your shit! You can fuck your brains out later!” 

“Fuck you!” Daryl shouted back at him but moved nevertheless. “Come on, let's go. The sooner we get there the sooner we’ll be back. I got a surprise for you.”

“Really?” She shot him a skeptical look. “It better not be handcuffs.” She added with just a hint of uncertainty. 

“Hell, I completely forgot what an optimist you are.” He chuckled but didn’t say more. 

They reached the gate and even though both sides were cleared, Oscar, stayed behind to keep watch while the trio went for the truck. They got inside the catwalk where all the cars were situated. 

“Okay, you just stay here while-” Merle stopped in the middle of the sentence when saw Daryl stare at the dead people on the other side of the fence. “Hey, you listening?”

“What?” Daryl asked, sounding as if he was woken up from a dream, lost in thought. Lumen was hovering few steps behind mouthing ‘give him a minute’. Merle only then realized that this world was new for his brother. He spent the last 10 months in that damn cafeteria, this afternoon was the first time he really fought these fuckers and now is probably the first time he has the chance to look at them like this. So he joined him and waited, prepared to answer any questions Daryl might have and hoped he’ll have the answers.

“Do they feel pain?” 

“No, I’m pretty sure they don’t feel a thing. They’re dead.” Merle said, glancing back at Lumen who only shrugged.

“Huh, what a waste.” Daryl murmured. He turned around and looked between the other two. “So, we going back?”

Merle took out two cigarettes, put one in his mouth to light it up and offered the other one to Daryl who took it. “Yeah, I’m gonna drive the truck, you two wait here and close the gate behind me, alright?”

“Sure,” Lumen said immediately, very used to Merle being in charge of how they did things.

“Yeah, sure,” Daryl said, his eyes not leaving Lumen.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Oscar was watching them the whole time from the other gate, glancing around occasionally. The area was secure, but one can never be too careful, not with those things roaming around. 

He looked behind when he heard someone open the door of the cellblock. There was a blond girl he didn't notice before when they were all inside. She now strolled down the stairs and to the yard, not really paying attention to her surroundings, her eyes glued to the ground. She stopped when she reached the fence not that far from where Oscar was standing. She lifted her head and just stared seemingly at the woods but actually at nothing. She didn't even notice he was there. A roar of an engine from where Merle, Daryl, and Lumen were picking up the truck woke her from her dreamlike state and she looked around. She jumped in fright seeing someone standing there.

“Hi.” Oscar lifted one arm in a greeting. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I would have said something but you just seemed to be so deep in your thoughts. I didn’t want to startle you, which I did anyway, so…” he trailed off, feeling stupid.

“No, it’s okay, I should have paid attention, I just- it was too much in there. I had to get some fresh air,” she said, not even attempting to smile.

“The old man, is he your dad?”

She shook her head. “Doesn’t make much difference though.”

“Yeah,” They were quiet for a moment, watching the truck stop after it drove through the other gate and Daryl and Lumen closing it before getting in. “I’m Oscar by the way.” He took a step in her direction, his arm outstretched to shake hers. She looked at it as if it might bite her, but eventually, she reached out to shake it, watching how her hand seemed to disappear in his much larger one. They were like night and day. Complete opposites. 

“I’m Amy.” She glanced up to meet his eyes.

“Hey! Stop romancing the lady and open the damn gate,” Merle shouted leaning out of the car window. 

“Yeah, as if I’m anywhere near the mood to romance anyone, asshole!” Oscar shot back and moved to open the gate for them to drive in.

“Hey there, dollface! Wanna join us for the dinner?” Merle continued when they got in while waiting for Oscar to be done closing the gate behind them.

“I- I think I’m gonna head back inside,” Amy said more to Oscar than anyone else. She turned around and hurried away.

“Hey, babydoll! Where are you going? Stay here for some good time! You’re breaking my heart!”

“Oh my God, Merle!” Lumen whined from his right, where she was sitting between him and Daryl. “You know what Hershel said.”

Merle turned to her, trying to look confused but failing miserably since he started to choked on the smoke trying to suppress the laugh.  
“What? I was a perfect gentleman. Asked her out to dinner and everything.” 

"It will only cause unnecessary trouble, just saying," she replied not wanting to get into that argument again. She looked at Daryl, looking for a backup, but Daryl didn't comment. He never did where Merle's big mouth was concerned. Merle coughed out the rest of the smoke stuck in his lungs while chuckling and went to park the truck in the inside yard.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

They took another door from the yard to enter the other part of the prison. The corridors they were walking through were dim but one could see well enough to move around. There were walker corpses laying here and there but other than that, it was very quiet. Until Lumen broke it off.

“I was thinking, maybe we should talk to Rick one more time, now that everything seems calmer? Push the deal, you know? I’m not sure I’m very comfortable with sleeping in the cellblock with all the other guys.”

“What? You think we won’t protect you?” Merle asked with a big smile on his face. 

Daryl who was walking a step behind her slid his hand from her lower back to her nape, he squeezed slightly and then continued making small circles with his thumb while he leaned closer and whispered, “don’t worry, we have a better place for us.” 

“Please,” Oscar let out a dry laugh, “do you really think we would let you sleep there? I am happy to get rid of those assholes and that’s saying something since I’m bunking with these two.”

“Oh,” her eyes went from Merle to Daryl, “well, now I’m worried. What’s the deal there, what did they do?”

“It’s nothing, darling,” Daryl stepped in, giving Oscar a look to let him know to shut up. “Nothing we can’t deal with, they really are just assholes, most people are, I’m- we’re handling this.”

“And here we are.” Merle exclaimed excitedly. There were two doors, one at the end of the hallway with a big ‘Cellblock B’ sign, another on their left with a ‘staff’ sign. Not giving her time or the space to react, Merle opened the ‘staff’ door with an exaggerated “ta-da!”

Lumen tentatively peeped inside of the room. 

“It’s clear we checked,” Daryl said from behind her nudging her to go in. 

She looked around. It was surprisingly not completely trashed like most places. The afternoon sunlight went in through dirty barred window. Though dusty, messy, and with all the evidence people left the place in a hurry, it looked normal enough and it was quite big. There was a small kitchen counter, and two round tables with some chairs lying around on the right side. On the left below the big window, there were three couches around a small coffee table. One placed with its back to the window, one to the wall and one to the room. Above the one pushed to the wall was a board with some notes and next to it was another door. A click sound behind her made her turn to see Merle locking the latch on the door and she felt the relief wash over her. She couldn’t remember the last time they could just lock the door behind them and feel at least relatively safe.

“It’s a break room and it has a smoking area behind that door with another couch. What do you say, sweetheart? Ain’t we lucky fellas?” Merle said sounding very pleased with himself as if he was the one who built the place for them.

“This is amazing,” Lumen breathed out, still looking around. 

Daryl moved to the door separating the smoking area taking her hand as he passed her and dragged her there. He closed the door behind them and for a moment he was just staring at her. After a minute or so he reached out to touch the center of her chest. While keeping looking into her eyes his fingers traced a path up to her neck and placed his hand there, adding a pressure only enough to feel her pulse. She let her bag slid from her shoulder, it dropped down to the ground with a thud. His fingers were still pressed to the side of her neck feeling the steady rhythm right under her skin. She watched him close his eyes and take a deep breath then slowly let it out before he slid his hand to the back of her neck and pulled her to him. He bent down to touch their foreheads together and took in another breath.

“I’ve missed you so damn much,” he breathed out in a voice so low she wouldn’t be able to hear it hadn’t she be standing this close. She pulled away to search his face.

“What?” He asked after a moment.

“Nothing,” she said, a small smile breaking on her face, ”I’m just little surprised. I was kinda expecting you to ask for a blowjob.” 

He chuckled lightly. “I would, but I haven’t had a shower in last ten months, and I rather you don’t throw up on me.” 

“Is this the surprise you talked about earlier?” She asked motioning around them with her hand.

“Nope, I was getting there. When we were cleaning the area with Rick and the others, we found another place you’ll love to see. Wanna go take a look?”

“I do, but maybe not right now? I’m hungry and tired, how about we leave it for tomorrow morning?”

“It’s a shower.”

“What?”

“We found out the showers are functional, I wouldn’t drink the water without boiling it first bu-”

“-Are you kidding me?” She shrieked, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner, come on, let’s go! Oh, my God, I can’t even remember the last time I hadn't have to use a bucket to wash up.” She kept ranting while rushing out of the room. She opened the door but after only two steps she turned back and hurried into the room, “gotta take clean clothes and a soap.”

“I take it you are happy with the surprise?” Merle called after her from his place on the couch.

“That question was rhetorical, right?” She ran out of the room again with her bag, beaming. 

“Oh yeah, well let’s go. We’ll be on watch while you shower and then we’ll switch.”

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

They heard the shouting before they turned the corner to the hallway in which the shower room was. They couldn’t understand what exactly was said but it wasn’t anything good for sure. Lumen and the guys quickened their pace. When they rounded the corner first thing they saw was Axel with only a towel around his waist leaving the tattoos on his hairy back exposed. His wide frame was blocking partly what was in front of him but soon they saw Rick with a troubled face and in front of him Lori and Maggie both with damp hair. Maggie was wearing only her boots, panties and shirt and was clenching her pants in their hands. They got there just in time to hear Lori hiss.

“See, Rick? This is what happens when you want us to live with criminals. Do you want us to look over our shoulder constantly? To-”

“-Hey, lady, it was an honest mistake!” Axel didn’t let her finish. “There is no schedule and we were locked up in that cafeteria for _ten_ months. You follow me? The others might be satisfied sleeping in their own filth but I want to-” He stopped and turn around when he saw Rick and the two women look behind him.  
“-Oh, hey, guys. Oscar! You know me, man. Tell them I’m not some creepy rapist.”

All eyes went to Oscar who shrugged, “he’s not, as far as I know at least.” 

“Thank you very much,” Axel said before looking back at Rick, eyebrows raised. He glanced at Daryl for confirmation but didn’t get any. Daryl continued to watch silently. He was pissed. All he wanted was to get in the shower with Lumen, he didn’t give a crap about this stupid argument.

“What happened? Are you ok?” Lumen asked, eyeing Lori’s very pregnant belly hanging out of her shirt.

“We’re alright.” Maggie said but Lori shot her a look of disbelief. 

“No, we’re not, this man has sneaked up on us whi-”

“-For the thousandth time _I wasn’t_ sneaking up on nobody!” Axel defended himself.

“All of you shut the fuck up!” Merle shouted over them and then continued more quietly. “If there are any of them biters left within these halls you’re gonna bring them all here.” 

That made them all successfully go quiet. 

“I don’t understand this.” Oscar shook his head, “Why were you two in the shower by yourself in the first place? Are you all stupid? Someone always has to keep watch.” 

He said it as if he was asking the women but he was looking at Rick who was rubbing his face with his hands trying to get rid of some of the exhaustion he was feeling.

“They weren’t alone,” he said in the end. “I was keeping watch, and I thought I heard something. So I went over there to take a look, but it was nothing and then I heard Maggie scream. It couldn’t be more than two minutes that I was gone.”

Maggie nodded, “yeah, I was almost finished so I turned around to get my towel and saw- _Axel,was it?_ standing in the doorway, I really don’t think he was creeping on us. He looked surprised.” She didn’t want to say it at loud, but she blamed Lori’s exaggerated reaction to her pregnancy. Everybody knew her emotions were all over the place, more so now when the delivery was approaching. 

“You think? If he wasn’t why was he just standing there staring at us then, huh?” Lori hissed.

Axel made a pained sound at the back of his throat. “I haven’t seen a woman for more than a year, so excuse me, I’m sorry but protecting your damn virtue wasn’t the first thing on my mind. I am a man after all.” 

“You hear that, Rick? I want them gone, it’s not safe with them here.” Lori’s voice cracked and she looked like she was about to cry. 

“Look around, Lori! It’s not like we can just kick them out.” Rick tried to reason with her. “We’ll just take more people next time to prevent these kinds of misunderstandings.” She looked like she was about to protest some more but Rick didn’t let her. “This _was_ a misunderstanding, Lori, nothing more. Isn’t that right?” He looked at Maggie.

“I’m sure it was,” she said glancing at Axel. “And frankly I’m fed up with standing here without my pants on, let’s just go back.”

“I’m rather enjoying the view if you catch my drift,” Merle gave her a wink while blatantly tugging at his waistband. Lori shot Rick a look as if Merle just proved her point and grabbed Maggie’s hand to drag her away. 

Rick placed his hands on his hips and exhaled loudly, “let’s just try to not let something like this happen again, yeah?” He addressed Axel.

“Hey, man, it’s not like I was planning on it, you follow me?” Axel raised the hand that wasn’t holding the towel in place palm up.

“Right, I guess I’ll see you around,” Rick murmured tiredly before turning around and jogging after his wife and Maggie, not really looking at the others.

When the trio got out of sight Axel turned around. “My ass is fucking freezing off here, you follow me? Pardon my French, madam,” he quickly added. “You all mind if I go first?”

“Go ahead.” Lumen stepped back to lean against the wall. 

“Sweet, thanks,” Axel said and swiftly walked inside.

“I’m gonna wash up too,” Oscar said before following after him.

“Yeah, you two keep an eye on things here. I’ll go too,” Merle nodded to himself and went inside muttering, “won’t take long.” 

Soon enough they heard the water running. Daryl glanced around the hallway, took Lumen’s hand and tugged at it, “Come on, we can wait around the corner.” But she pulled her arm out of his light grip.

“No, we are supposed to look out for them, we can’t do that around the corner.”

“You know that they’re there most likely jerking off to that long legs image still fresh on their mind, right?”

“I guess, so?” She answered, earning a chuckle from Daryl.

“So? Who are you? Where did the shy _‘not now, your brother is in the next room’_ girl go?”

“She spent last few months traveling with your brother who unfortunately isn’t shy about his needs. As you very well know,” she said dryly. But it had hardly the effect she expected. Daryl’s expression turned cold.

“What has he done?” He asked, a million images running through his head.

“Oh no, no, no, he hasn’t done anything,” she was quick to explain. “But he gets horny a lot, and I wasn’t about to help him with that. We haven’t had always the luxury of privacy, so he just went off somewhere near by. He didn’t want to leave me alone for too long in case something went wrong and we had to make run for it. I minded my own business and kept watch so nothing would sneak up on him...” She trailed off, closing her eyes, frustrated. “Wow, it actually sounds terrible when said at loud like this. Sorry.” 

Neither of them said anything after that, only the sound of running water from the showers could be heard. She opened her eyes when she felt him touch her arm to find him right in front of her. She didn’t hear him move. He checked the hallway before focusing on her again. He ran his hands up her arms, palmed her shoulders and then continued down across her chest. He lightly cupped her breasts before squeezing them, pushing her against the wall, he pressed his body against hers. She took hold on his elbows, lifting her head up because she expected him to kiss her, but he just kept staring at her. She wanted to ask if he was upset, she doubted it though, she never saw him _upset_. Angry, that’s more likely. Was he angry? She hoped not, nothing good comes out of that one. She was about to break the silence but never got the chance.

“Well damn,” Merle hollered from the doorway making her jump, “is this how you keep an eye on things here? Good to know! I’m gonna be sure to never have you on watch together, we would all get eaten.” Oscar and Axel were right behind not looking very happy either.

“It’s free now,” Axel said while walking pass them in the direction of the cellblock, “night” he called over his shoulder before disappearing around the corner.

“Night,” Lumen replied so quietly he surely hadn’t heard her. She couldn’t bring herself to talk louder due to her embarrassment. She completely forgot to watch the halls, how could she forget?

Daryl snorted and turned to face his brother, “I was keeping an eye on things just fine. You’re just jealous,” he said with a grin and then dragged Lumen to the shower room.

“Did you really?” She asked Daryl once they were inside.

“Did I what?”

“Pay attention, I feel so stupid now, I can’t believe I just forgot. It was stupid.” She scolded herself while taking her pants off. “So did you really watch out? Daryl?” She turned to him when he didn’t reply to find him staring at her ass. His eyes slid up to her face and he nodded.

“Yeah, I did. Go on,” he urged, motioning with his hand to her body.

“What, you want a striptease? I don’t feel very sexy Daryl, I’m gross,” she said, feeling self–conscious now that he was watching her like this. 

“Alright,” he sighed, and started to peel off his own shirt and continued until he was naked. He reached around her to grab the soap she had ready and gave her a wink before walking under one of the shower heads and pushing the button for the water to flow. Lumen watched him wash for a moment before shaking her head and doing the same as him.

“Fuck, it’s cold!” she shrieked when the water hit her skin, “Why didn’t you say anything, you could have warned me.”

“I don’t mind it, I kinda needed a cold shower.” He smirked at her.

“Ass,” she muttered while she hurried to get herself as clean as possible as quickly as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Leave a comment if you want :-)


	6. Chapter 6

“So, how much should I be worried about your friends in that cellblock?” Lumen broke the silence on their way back to their room, nodding to the door with a “Cellblock D” sign at the end of the hallway. 

"What're you talking about?" Merle asked from the doorway of the break room.

Daryl just growled, "they ain't no friends of ours." With no further explanation, he motioned for her to follow Oscar and Merle inside their shared place. Which she did and he closed and locked the door after them.

"Oh, well, the question is the same either way," she insisted while making herself comfortable on the couch by the door leading to her and Daryl's room, waiting on Merle to give her some of whatever they brought from the cafeteria so they could finally eat.

“We didn’t take much, we’ll go for more tomorrow. So as for now, you can have beans or chili beans.” Merle turned to her a can in each hand.

“Chilli for me please.” She held out her hands and Merle tossed the can to her. She turned it around to see if there was an opener. There wasn’t one, suddenly the can was snatched from her fingers. She looked beside her and there was Daryl, with his own can between his knees and his hunting knife in his hand. She watched how it sliced through the metal and some of the red sauce leaked out. She was so hungry she for a moment forgot she asked anything, until-

“You don’t have to worry about Axel,” Oscar said sitting on the couch under the window with his own dinner. “He was part of some biker club. He lives by a code, I don’t think he’d hurt anybody just for the hell of it.” 

Lumen looked at Daryl to see if he had something to add, but Daryl just nodded and passed her the now opened can and she dug into it.

“Okay, that’s one, what about the rest?” She turned back to Oscar who looked more willing to share his opinion.

“Big Tiny, the one taller than me by a head, he’s harmless. He’s here just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, for being stupid basically. He’s giant but he’s scared of his own shadow. The only thing you have to worry about with him is that he won’t get your back. He would more likely take to his heels than help you, that’s for sure.”

Lumen nodded, that was good to know. But the one she was actually already worried about Oscar haven’t mentioned yet.

“What about the guy with long hair? He was looking at me funny, gave me the chills,” she asked, taking mouthful of her chili heaven.

“We already went through this, sweetheart, your judge of character is worth shit.” Merle joined the conversation from where he was sprawled on the third couch, pouring the content of his can directly into his mouth without using a spoon. He rolled his eyes at her and glanced to Daryl. Merle knew his brother wanted to kill the guy, but that didn’t really say if Tomas was really trouble or not and Daryl’s expression didn’t give anything away. 

Lumen’s hand paused above the can for a second as she thought about what he said before she spooned some from it.  
“Alright, I think you made yourself perfectly clear on that matter. That’s why I’m asking you all for your opinion instead of going with my guts.” She scraped the last pieces of her chilli out then put the now empty can on the table. She swallowed and cleared her throat before continuing, “There is no reason in throwing it in my face all the time.”

“I’m taking care of it,” Daryl interrupted, “him and that prick that’s following him around.” He decided to share his intentions. There was no point in hiding it, she’d find out sooner or later anyway.

“Oh…” Lumen looked down at her hands unwittingly playing with the hem of her shirt. At the back of her mind, she knew this moment will come, though that didn’t help her with how she felt about it now. She wasn’t sure how much she was actually okay with it either, if at all. She watched Merle kill a man once, but it was in self-defence and after that encounter, they decided to figure out a new way to approach people. 

This here though, this was different. This was deciding to kill someone over dinner. As if they were talking about splitting up supplies. She had a very vivid image of Daryl killing a man too and it was nothing like what Merle did. Merle killed for them to survive. Daryl, on the other hand, enjoyed doing it. She couldn’t pretend anymore like she did when Daryl was in prison. Reality came crashing over her like a ton of bricks, leaving her at a loss for words. 

“Come on.” Daryl suddenly grabbed her arm to pull her up, and without a word dragged her to their room, closing the door behind them.

Merle glanced at Oscar and they shared a look that said it all. It needed to be done. Tomas needed to go. And they weren’t about complaining about leaving the doing to Daryl.

Inside of the other room Lumen pulled her arm out of Daryl’s grip, which wasn’t very strong, to begin with. She walked the few steps to the couch and slumped down on it. Daryl didn’t move from the door. He was thinking about what to say when he heard her tired sigh.

“When you talked about _‘taking care of it’_ you couldn’t possibly mean _‘I’m gonna talk to him and sort things out’_?”

That not very good attempt in lightening the mood assured him he was allowed to come close, so he moved to the couch to squat down in front of her. He put his hands over hers, stilling their nervous movement on her thighs and looked her straight in the eye before answering her honestly with a simple “No.”

“That’s what I thought,” she mumbled and dropped her eyes to her lap to silently watch their hands.

He tilted his head to catch her eye, and when he did he asked the only thing that really mattered to him. “You know you are safe with me, right?” 

“I know,” she answered with a quick jerky nod because she did. At the question, she realized it actually didn’t even cross her mind that he would possibly want to hurt _her_. She feared for the people around them, and so she decided to voice those worries. “What about other people living here though? How safe are they?” She asked tentatively.

He tilted his head to the side, thinking about it. He wanted to be honest with her, but didn’t at the same time. He wanted this conversation to be over, because he knew he couldn’t give her the answers she wanted to hear. He couldn’t just promise her he won’t kill anybody, because he honestly didn’t know. He didn’t understand what exactly triggered that need in him. He was starting to get frustrated with this whole situation because he simply didn’t know what to tell her. His silence was answer enough though and she sucked in a shuddering breath.

“There are kids, Daryl. That little boy and the baby is coming any day now,” she whispered and his head turned back to her so fast Lumen thought he might get whiplash.

“I don’t hurt kids,” he whispered actually sounding offended and with a deep breath he pushed back. “The question ain’t what _I’m_ or I’m _not_ gonna do though. The real question is what are _you_ gonna do.”

“What do you mean?” She looked at him confused.

“You _know_ who I am, you probably know it better than anyone and you came here anyway. So what is this? Are you having cold feet now?”

“No, I’m not, I just- it just- it feels like, I don’t know.” She shook her head and took a minute to gather her thoughts.  
“I feel responsible like if you hurt somebody it would be on me somehow. I am supposed to be helping people, not plot how to hurt them.”

“That’s bullshit,” he said rolling his eyes, “what I do, that’s all on me and me only. You're not plotting anything, besides, it’s not like I’m gonna go and butcher them all tomorrow. I was just being honest with you. All I said was that we need to get rid of Tomas and Andrew. I got a good reason for it too.”

 _I’m sure you do_ , went through her head, but she didn’t dare to voice the sarcastic remark aloud. After all, before his jail time, his last reason to kill someone and facing the death sentence afterward was her. And weirdly enough, he never blamed her for it. So no, she was not about to bring up his reasons.

“So I ask again,” he continued when he saw she wasn’t about to say anything, “do you have second thoughts now, do you wanna leave?”

“Even if I did, where would I go?” She answered, looking around helplessly. 

“That’s a good point, but what I asked was do you _want to_?”

Her eyes zeroed in on his again. She searched his face not even sure what she was looking for. No, the fact they never talked about these things during her visits didn't mean they didn't exist. That he miraculously changed in the course of last two years. She would be naive to think that. What _was_ she thinking? She _didn't_ think, that's what.

But the longer she looked at him the clearer was to her, that she hasn't changed either. Despite everything she still loved him. She felt safe with him. And so she let herself be selfish and made her choice.

“No,” she said wetting her lips nervously, “I don’t want to leave you.” 

“Good,” he breathed out and only now she realized he was holding his breath. Lost in her thoughts she didn’t notice he wasn’t breathing even though her eyes haven’t swayed from his face the last few moments.

“That’s very good,” he said again nodding to himself and then he slowly leaned over to kiss her. 

It seemed like he was testing the waters, because he gave her only small peck at first, moving with caution. But when she didn't move away or try to stop him otherwise he pressed in. He moved from his crouched position and went down on his knees, making his way between her legs to get closer to her. He slid his hands up her thighs to her hips and kept going around her to grab her butt. He then abruptly pushed her toward him. Her own hands shot up to his shoulders at the sudden move and she broke the kiss.

He let his hands roam over her body, following their trail with his eyes. It felt still surreal to have her this close and to be able to touch her freely. He knew these questions would come and part of him expected her to run away from him, but she didn’t, she was still his.

He glanced up to find her watching him with a serious expression. Her eyes held almost hypnotizing intensity. It made his hands stay still on her hips, as he focused on her face.

“You know, I do recognize this is my second chance,” he whispered, “I’ve been listening about the world outside, and how hopeless everybody feels about it, but to me,” he paused taking one hand off her hip and reached out for her cheek. He ran the back of his finger over it, along her jaw, and down her neck. He rested it there making small circles with his thumb over the little line where he could feel her pulse beating. He realized he got sidetracked and teared his eyes from the sight to look back into her eyes.  
“To me it’s everything. If all of this didn’t happen I'd be still on death row, I’d see you and Merle for the rest of my short life twice a month through a thick glass. And after all those months locked in that damn cafeteria, I’d say it’s a fucking miracle to have you in front of me like this.”

“I know,” she said so quietly he almost didn’t catch it, “when I saw this place, walkers all around…” she trailed off, she didn’t want to think much less talk about how much her hopes had dropped at the scene.

“But here we are,” he said with a small smile.

“Here we are,” she replied, the corners of her mouth turning up just a bit.

“You won’t regret staying by my side, darling, I promise you that.” He made the very first honest promise of his life. He knew he can’t fuck this up, because in this world the next fuck up of his life would mean death and he’d do everything to keep his family out of harm’s way.

She didn’t got the chance to react to the statement, because he tightened his hold on both, her hip and the her neck and he pulled her against him, kissing her again. The couch didn’t have the right high, so he pulled again to bring her down on his lap, so she could feel him hard against her groin. He rolled his hips while pushing her body to him with his hands, but it didn't seem enough. Their bodies were flushed against each other and it still didn’t feel close enough to him. He teared his shirt off and reached for a hem of hers, but she was already working on taking it off, so he went for her pants. Once he got the zipper open he nudged her to slide off his lap so he could lay her down to take the pants off of her. 

“Cold,” she hissed the moment her bare back touched the floor and set up again, almost hitting their foreheads together in the process.

“What was that?” He looked at her from where he was kneeling still between her legs when his attempt at undressing her was interrupted.

“The floor, it’s cold.”

“Right.” He looked around, his mind felt clouded, and his brain was refusing to work properly.

“Alright, up to the couch you go then,” he said, already getting up and dragging her with him. When she moved to sit down, he tightened the hold on her arm to stop her and with a smirk, he reached down and yanked her pants down along with her panties. He pushed her down then and pulled on her legs to finish his work, leaving her sprawled in front of him.

“Take that off too.” He motioned to her bra, the only piece of clothes she was still wearing and went on the couch with her. Settling himself back between her legs he ran his hands up her inner thighs.

“What? No ple-ase?” Her voice broke on the last word as his fingers reached her crotch and he slit his thumb between her folds and pushed it against her clit. 

“Pretty please,” he said mindlessly, his eyes glued to what he was doing with his hands. He bent down and gave her pussy a long lick before he put his mouth where his thumb had been and sucked. She put her hands on his head and her fingers curled into his hair, pressing his face against her tensing body. He started to push his fingers inside her, fully intended to please her first, but when he heard her low moan those plans flew out of the window. It’s been so damn long and if he didn’t get inside her soon he’d blow in his pants.

His mouth abandoned the clit, earning a discontent whimper from her. He moved over her, noticing her bra was still on, while he fumbled to open his belt buckle.

“I’m sorry, I just need-”

“It’s okay,” she cut off the unnecessary apology, sliding her hands from his hair to his neck, caressing him. She understood.

He got rid of his pants and her bra in record time, but when that was done, she felt him calm down again. He was moving against her while watching her face intently, but he wasn’t trying to push in. And she realized why, when he slid his hand up to her neck and slowly closed his fingers around it. Not firmly enough for her to not to be able to breathe but tight enough to be aware of her own pulse pounding under her skin. He kept searching her face for a yes or a no sign.

“Not tighter though,” she whispered.

He bent down to kiss a spot under her ear, "Anything you want, darling," he breathed before shifting his body a bit and slowly let himself slip inside her, but he didn't try to go all the way in just yet. He buried his face in her hair, laying his body over hers. He kept himself from crushing her with his free hand flattened beside her shoulder and continued with several shallow thrusts before giving her one hard and deep. Her breathing hitched and her hands moved to his back, holding on. 

He pushed himself up to look at her face, to check if she was alright and then started with the shallow thrusts again. He kept repeating the process, only as the time went there were less shallow ones and more deep ones. Their eyes stayed locked until he went in with one particularly hard thrust. Her eyes rolled back, her mouth opened in a silent scream. Her hands moved down over his sides to his butt which she grabbed to keep him close while she rolled her hips, grinding her clit against his skin.

His hand flexed on her neck but didn’t squeeze any harder. He was transfixed by the sight in front of him. Although he was the one on top, literally holding her by her neck, she was the one fucking him from below. He watched her move, heard her quiet moans and felt her body tense, going almost rigid. 

He decided to take over then. He let go of her throat, and grasped her firmly by her shoulder to keep her still while he rammed his cock into her again and again and again until she started to shake and he felt her walls spasm around him as she finally fell over the edge. The added pressure made him follow right after and with a low growl he spilled inside of her. He bent his head to kiss her, pushing his tongue into her mouth as he continued to move jerkily within her till he was completely spent. He broke the kiss and let his body drop down breathing heavily. 

Lumen started to draw patterns on his skin with her fingers. She wasn’t bothered by his weight pinning her down, she liked it. She could feel the rugged texture of his skin where his scars where and the smooth skin in other places. She went on with her ministration until she felt him slip out of her and he moved his whole body off her. He reached over the armrest to fish blankets from the pile they dropped there earlier and proceed to cover them with it. He then snuggled up with her, and wrapped his arm around her bringing her as close to him as possible.

They laid together in silence until the fatigue took over and they fell asleep.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“What crawled up your ass and died? You got what you wanted so calm down.” Oscar watched Merle angrily kick a box he accidentally knocked over. He earned an angry glare for his comment. _No_ , Merle thought, _he absolutely did not get what he wanted_. 

Merle was in a foul mood since Lumen tried to throw him out of the infirmary. They decided to show her around, so she wouldn’t get lost in the corridors. It wasn’t exactly a maze, but few wrong turns and one could get easily confused.

After the brief tour they decided to split so two of them would go stock some of the food from the cafeteria in their room and one of them would stay with Lumen in the infirmary, where they were at that moment to make an inventory check on supplies. Merle offered his help since he knew drugs better than Oscar or Daryl, but his reasoning fell on deaf ears. 

Lumen started to go off to one of the cabinets with Daryl right behind her, which made Merle even more annoyed, Daryl was acting like her shadow since they emerged from their room and didn't talk at all. He was just walking with her and watching her. It was fucking creepy where Merle was concerned. 

He barked after them, "Hey! I was talking to you!" Lumen turned to him looking genuinely confused.

“Wait, you were actually serious? I thought that was some kind of joke. Merle, I don’t want you helping me here.”

“Why the fuck not?” he asked, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Come on Merle you _know_ why!” she actually whined. “You shouldn’t be around drugs.”

“Fuck you! I quit for you, you should show some appreciation.” 

Oscar and Daryl both gave him looks full of doubts, which were confirmed as soon as Lumen shot back, “No fuck you! You didn’t quit, you ran out of that shit and then I had to take care of your withdrawal ass. Something I’d rather not go through again. So please, would you be so kind and went with Oscar to take care of the food.”

“Fucking bullshit,” he spat, “we’re all staying, do the check up and then we’ll go for food, it’ll make no difference to split and we’ll be safer,” he said, already moving around Lumen to one of the cabinets. 

Daryl turned to Lumen, his eyebrow raised in amusement, wanting to see if she had anything else to add. For some reason, he found it funny to watch her fight with Merle like this. Women usually didn’t have the nerve talk back to his brother. But she just sighed.

“He’s got a point there actually,” she mumbled not happy about this whole thing but she knew she won’t bend him.

So now, two hours later, they had a good idea about what they had here. To Merle’s big disappointment a prison infirmary wasn’t exactly stocked with the kind of drugs he was interested in which didn’t help to improve his mood any. He kicked the table he was standing by in frustration making the drawers fly out. Oscar let out a heavy sigh and left him to it. Instead, he went join Lumen and Daryl where they were packing some first aid kits they could all carry in their bags. Lumen looked up at his approach and gave him an apologetic smile.

“There is no point in talking to him right now. Wait till he cools off a bit,” she said lowly.

“There’s no point in it _now_? You say it like there _is_ a time I could have a nice calm conversation with him,” he laughed. “So whatcha doing here, want some help?”

“I think we are almost done, but sure, you can pack that one.” She pointed at one of the two small piles of supplies left for packing. 

“Good thinking by the way, with the aid kits I mean.” Oscar complimented while getting busy with the task.

Merle sat heavily on the table he just abused. He took a several deep breaths trying to compose himself when something caught his eyes. His look zeroed in on one of the drawers that landed on the floor. There was a bottle with some clear liquid in it, hopefully moonshine, or- hell any alcohol would do. But what made a smile break on his face was the small plastic pharmacy bottle laying next to it. He glanced around seeing Lumen, Daryl and Oscar busy with the supplies. He reached for the small bottle to inspect the pills in it.  
“Doc, you son of a bitch,“ he muttered, satisfied with his found he pocketed it and then took the other bottle. He unscrewed the cap and sniffed the contents, gin. It wasn’t his favorite but beggars can’t be choosers. 

“Who wants to join me for a drink,” he hollered turning to the others, grinning widely, showing them proudly the bottle.

“Oh boy,” Lumen muttered under her breath at first, but after giving it a second thought, she could use a drink and seeing Daryl and Oscar faces, they could too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, anyone there? It better be since updating on this site is a bitch.  
> I hope you enjoyed the chapter.


	7. Chapter 7

Merle started to walk to the three of them. Bottle in hand, a grin on his face, he looked genuinely content for once. Before anyone had a chance to take him up on his offer the door to the infirmary was yanked open and in came Axel with Big Tiny following him. 

Axel momentarily halted when he noticed the room was occupied, making Big Tiny almost run into him from behind.

“Hey, I should have known someone’s here when I saw Andrew sniffing around empty handed,” he casually continued to the exam table when he saw who it was, “looks like he’s trying to avoid you,” Axel added with a chuckle while eying the packed kits.

That got Daryl’s attention. “You seen Tomas too?” He rasped. He hadn’t seen Tomas or Andrew since yesterday afternoon when they parted ways after they cleared the cellblock off the biters. Not that he was actively looking for them, but still, he’d rather keep track of their whereabouts.

Axel shook his head, “no man, haven’t seen either of them till minutes ago when I spotted Andrew scramble away when he saw us. Wasn't looking for them either though, you following me?” He said, looking questioningly back at Big Tiny, but he shook his head too, he didn’t see anything.

“Can you keep an eye out for them? Let me know if you see anything?” Daryl asked casually.

“Maybe he fled,” Oscar offered.

Daryl snorted, “on foot? With them biters all around? That’d be fucking stupid.”

“I never thought him very bright.” Oscar chuckled.

Axle glanced around at all the faces in the room, “you wanna, ehm,” he paused eying Lumen for a bit before he finished carefully, “have a chat with him or something?”

Merle’s eyes jumped between Lumen and Axel, “no need to watch what you say around her. That’s Lumen, Daryl’s old lady,” he explained in a language Axel would understand.

“Oh, good,” Axel relaxed more and moved closer to them, “I assume you wanna get rid of him then?”

“Yeah,” Daryl confirmed with a curt nod, checking on Lumen’s reaction. He wasn’t as sure about Merle’s statement as Merle seemed to be, she looked pretty upset yesterday and Daryl wanted to avoid those kinds of conversations in future if possible. She met his eyes. Her lips had a slight quiver to them, showing that she was struggling with herself, but eventually, the corners of her mouth lifted in the smallest smile. It looked a bit forced but it was a smile all the same. She then went back to the last kit in front of her, busying herself with it.

Axel leaned against the table, missing the subtle exchange between Lumen and Daryl entirely.  
“You won’t see me complaining. I won’t miss that fucker none, he has it coming where I’m concerned, you follow me?” He looked at Big Tiny silently asking to back up his statement. Which he didn’t.

“Don’t look at me,” the big guy said, his hands up in a don’t-shoot gesture, ”I don’t want to have anything to do with this, I don’t look for no trouble.”

“Suit yourself,” Daryl growled. This guy was annoying paradox, how could someone this big be such a pussy was beyond him, “just don’t be in our way and keep your mouth shu-”

All of their eyes shot up hearing a loud bang of something being knocked down coming from the direction of the open door. _Did they leave it open? Didn’t the stupid ogre shut it close behind him._ Before Daryl finished his thought Axel darted forward and in few strides, he was out of the room, and they all but Big Tiny followed close behind. 

Daryl nudged Oscar, raising his eyebrows at him only to see an equally surprised expression on Oscar’s face. For a guy of his size, Axel was impressively fast, who knew? Up until now, they’ve both only seen him roaming around in a turtle like speed. They didn’t even rounded the corner to the hallway when they heard a yelp and a thud, and when they finally caught up, knives and guns ready, they found Axel with wide eyed Glenn pinned to the wall. A gun was lying few steps to their side.

“Chinaman!” Merle, who was still holding the bottle of gin, exclaimed as if seeing an old friend, although his expression told another story entirely. He reached for the gun on the ground at the same time Lumen tried to push her way from the back where Daryl was keeping her during their advance. She wanted to go to Axel to do... something, she wasn’t sure what exactly but Daryl wouldn’t let go of her anyway. 

Axel seemed to guess her trouble because he lifted the hand that wasn’t holding Glenn, but a crowbar she hadn’t noticed up until then, to stop her. 

“Hold your horses, ladybug, we just need to have a little chat here, that’s all,” Axel said calmly before turning his attention back to Glenn.  
“My friend,” he said in a cheerful tone that was very much in contradiction with his serious face, “that wasn’t very smart, didn't your mama ever tell you it’s not polite to eavesdrop?”

Glenn’s eyes jumped from one face to another until he locked them with Lumen, the only one who didn’t look ready to kill him. Which she wasn’t because although it was obvious Glenn heard them talk, they didn’t know what exactly he heard and yet they all acted like they weren’t far from slicing the poor man’s throat. 

She shifted her weight nervously, glancing around. She kept trying to come up with something to say, something, anything. But looking at all the calm faces around her the only thing she could think of was that these guys interpretation of the word 'chat' was seriously fucked up. Her thought was interrupted by loud voice.

“What the hell is going on here?” All of them looked to where the voice came from to find Rick with Beth and Maggie standing behind him. He had his hand on the revolver but was reluctant to pull it out, not wanting to make things worse. He was outnumbered after all. 

“They were plotting to kill you!” Glenn cried out, shutting his eyes. He wanted to warn his friend no matter the circumstances. Now he expected the blow to come but instead the pressure of the hold Axel had on him eased and when he opened his eyes he found somewhat confused expression on Axel's face. The adrenaline in his veins made everything sound muted like hearing it from under water, but he still made out Merle’s and Oscar’s voices through it saying at the same time, “that ain’t true!” and “No we were not!”

Merle shot Oscar an amused look, but other than that nobody moved. 

Axel rolled his eyes, "see you dumbass? That's what you got from eavesdropping, nothing solid. What were you doing here snooping around anyway?" he said angrily and with a shove, he let go of Glenn completely before turning to address Rick, "wasn't that damn deal about sticking to our parts of this damn place? We agreed to share the food in the cafeteria stock and the showers and that turned up messy already, so what are you doing here." 

Rick left his revolver in the holster and lifted his hands up while Glenn slid alongside the wall to where the rest of his group members were standing. He wasn’t sure what to make of what Glenn said. This could be easily another misunderstanding and he wasn’t about start something that could have been avoided.

“We need medical supplies from the infirmary,” Rick started to explain, “Beth tried to redress and clean Hershel’s wound but he started to bleed too much again. She managed to stop it but we need more bandages.” 

“But Rick-” Glenn tried again but was interrupted by Lumen who snapped into her nurse mode after hearing the news and started to talk over Daryl’s shoulder directly to Beth. 

“I thought you said your dad taught you things. You are not suppose to redress amputate limb right the next day! Come on!” She motioned for Beth to come with her to the infirmary to get what they needed, which she did before anyone could stop her. 

Rick briefly looked back at Maggie to check her reaction, their eyes met and despite her tense expression, she gave a curt nod. She wanted to just get things they needed and be gone, she was worried for her father and that was her only focus right now. 

As was Beth's. Too distressed about her dad's condition to consider the possible danger, she hurried to catch up without a second thought, brushing between Oscar and Merle on her way. Trying to justify her actions she started to explain, "we always redressed the wounds back at the farm at least once a day. I thought I should do it now too."

"Okay, alright," Lumen put her hand on Beth's shoulder and guided her to the door noticing Daryl following right behind them, "you are not treating animals anymore, okay? From now on, if you won't be sure about how to proceed you come to me and..." her voice trailed away when the trio disappeared behind the door.

Maggie moved to go after them but this time Glenn quickly caught her arm. "I swear I heard them talking about killing someone. We can't just not do anything." Glenn urged the issue. Looking for support his eyes were jumping from Maggie to Rick who rubbed his hands over his tired face before looking around.

Rick wanted to do right by his group, by his family, and he desperately wanted to keep the truce with Merle and the others so he could focus on them. But the stress was beginning to be too much. It felt like they couldn't catch a break. There seemed to be always something and he was exhausted. He was about to ask what exactly have Glenn heard and for a moment he felt almost relieved when someone else started to talk until he heard what it was. 

“Oh no, you don’t!” Merle sounded more than fed up. “It’s the same damn thing over and over ever since the day we’ve met and I had just about enough! It’s obvious we will be seeing each other around a lot. This prison ain’t that big!” He spread out his arms, motioning around himself, the bottle still in one hand, Glenn’s gun in the other. “And I won’t be explaining myself every damn time we cross paths and you happen to think you heard or saw something.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree with Merle here.” Oscar shook his head. “We are bound to run into each other, we share the showers, the supplies at the cafeteria and you obviously need the infirmary and Lumen’s help. If not for the old man then for your wife and the baby. Even the cars are parked side by side outside. So how about we all chill.”

“Fuck, I just wanted to enjoy a drink,” Merle muttered the last part under his breath quietly only for Oscar to hear, wiggling the bottle in front of Oscar’s face, making him snicker in a response.

"I'm not starting anything." Rick tried to defend himself. He then addressed Merle since he was the one they made the deal with in the first place before they even got into the prison. "But you have to admit that this particular thing asks for some explanation. I mean I'm pretty sure Glenn here didn't make it up. I'm not accusing anyone of anything, I'm just saying that if there is some kind of danger, we should know," He said calmly, motioning to Glenn and Maggie with his thumb.

Merle made as if he was thinking about it before he shook his head, any trace of playfulness gone, “no, I don’t think I owe you any explanation at all.”

Just then Beth and Lumen emerged from the infirmary with hands full of supplies. They were talking to each other and Daryl was tailing them again. Big Tiny decided to come out too, but he stayed by the door, not wanting to get involved in the argument going on.

"I packed the Epogen I told you about too. It hasn't been kept in a fridge but from how you described the bleeding, we'll just have to try it." Lumen showed the medicine to Beth before she put it in the box she was holding.

“But you will go with me to inject it, right?” Beth asked with big worried eyes.

“Yes, of course, I will. We just can’t be certain it will work, we have to try though…” she trailed off, picking up on the edgy atmosphere around her and remembering the reason for it. 

She stopped walking and took in everyone's expression before she locked eyes with Merle. They spent a long time together and it came naturally to her to seek his guidance. He held her gaze for a moment before his eyes slid behind her where she knew Daryl was standing and she saw his expression soften just a bit before it went hard again when he turned back to Rick.

“We’ve been nothing but civil to you and your group. As far as I am concerned all we do here is doing you fucking favors, so kindly take your bandages and fuck off, _officer_ ,” he growled.

“Okay, we’ll go,” Rick tried to save whatever was left of the truce, motioning for Beth to go to them. She made a step forward but stopped to look pleadingly at Lumen who looked apologetically at Merle in turn. Not because she was sorry about offering her help, but because now she somehow felt as if she was going against Merle and she didn’t like that particular feeling.

"I promised to go check on Hershel with her." She gave him a helpless shrug.

“Well nobody’s stopping you, sweetheart,” Merle answered with an exaggerated gesture toward the trio, shooting Rick a pointed look.

Lumen gave him a brief smile and hurried to Beth’s side before they both joined Maggie, Glenn, and Rick who gave Merle a tense curt nod and then they all rushed off.

Merle turned so he was facing everyone left in the hallway, “what a prick, anyone else feels like just killing them all and be done with it?” Daryl opened his mouth, about to say something, but Merle quickly jumped in, “No, you don’t answer that, it was a rhetorical question.” 

Daryl narrowed his eyes at him. “I was gonna say I’m going after them, to keep an eye on her,” Daryl said, his tone bored as he was already moving to leave.

“Yeah, that’s a shocker,” Merle grumbled making Daryl stop in his track and turn back to him.

“What the hell? What’s that suppose to mean? You want her wandering around by herself when she goes back or what?” He asked, no longer sounding bored but angry instead. 

“‘Course not,” Merle said with a heavy sigh. “You go, we’ll take care of the food.” He motioned to Oscar. 

Daryl stared at him for a moment but when he saw Merle wasn’t about to elaborate he turned to go to catch up with Lumen.

“I’m saving the drinks for later,” Merle called after him receiving a dismissing wave in response. He watched him leave till he rounded the corner to the other hallway before turning back to Oscar and the others.

“Alright, what’s your plan for the day?” Merle asked Axel.

“Nothing much, we were on our way out. Someone said yesterday that those dead walking- things are piling up around the fences. I thought we could look how much of a problem that is.” 

"Finally a decent idea," Merle nodded, "if you see-"

“I’ll let one of you know.” Axel confirmed before Merle finished the sentence, drawing a huff from Big Tiny.

Merle glared at him, “what? Got something to say?” he said making Big Tiny glare back but otherwise stay quiet. “That’s what I thought, dumb coon.”

“Nice!” Oscar deadpanned sarcastically from behind him.

“What?” Merle exclaimed, “he’s a dumb fuck.”

“Whatever.” Oscar waved him off, deciding there was no point in explaining that calling Big Tiny _‘dumb’_ wasn’t the part he didn’t agree with. Instead, he nodded his goodbye to Axel and Big Tiny.

Merle gave a nod to Axel and ignored Big Tiny falling step behind Oscar who was looking straight ahead, marching swiftly in the direction of the cafeteria. Merle watched him for a bit and when he was sure Oscar won’t turn to look or talk to him he took out the orange bottle from his pocket and popped one of the pills. 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It took Oscar some time to go through all the supplies in the cafeteria stock since Merle wasn’t much of help, but he managed to pack enough for the four of them to last for at least two weeks. In the end, Merle being there turned out to be not completely of no use when he came up with an idea to pack few more boxes and stock them in the truck, so they had food ready if they needed to leave in hurry for whatever reason. It wouldn’t be the first time that happened to Merle. 

They moved all of it to their room and then they went outside with what was meant to be put in the truck. When that was done Oscar sat down on the bed of the truck and started to open one of the cans he carried out so he could eat outside. The sun was still high and it was hot but he didn’t care. He was just glad to be anywhere with fresh air. 

“Something you said earlier stuck with me.” Oscar broke the silence. 

Merle’s head popped out of the back window of the cabin where he was searching for something, “what?” He asked as if he didn’t quite catch what Oscar said, “oh, here they are,” he added contentedly and then got out to join Oscar in the back. “What did you say?” He mumbled around a cigarette he now had between his lips and was about light up.

Oscar looked up from the can at him, “was talking about what you said earlier. That you are right. This prison ain’t that big. How come nobody saw Tomas then? We did a fucking tour this morning and we didn’t run into him. Where is he?”

Merle blew out some smoke looking as if he was thinking hard about the question before a big grin broke on his face, “jerking off somewhere probably. He’ll show up, I wouldn’t worry about that. It seemed to me like he was very adamant about this being his place so-” He stopped suddenly. “What have you all been doing all those months for him to get this cocky anyway? Kissing his ass? That doesn’t sound like my brother at all. I’m kinda surprised that asshole was still breathing when we came here, to be honest.” 

Oscar kept his eyes down for a moment, "of course we didn't. But we didn't know what's really happening outside, and we had an agreement. If we knew nothing will ever be the same I would kill him myself," he said seriously, locking eyes with Merle briefly before looking around, his face severe. His frown deepened when he caught a sight of blond hair by the fence. "I don't know much details, but from what I've heard he was sent here for some fucked up shit." 

Merle turned to follow Oscar’s line of sight, “well my brother wasn’t here for picking daisies either. Why are you for the death sentence for old Tomas so badly?”

“I know, Daryl,” Oscar said absently, “I trust Daryl, and from what I know, Daryl also doesn’t get his rocks off by raping and torturing women, right? Unlike our wanted friend. I say, better the devil you know.” He finished his thought before he hopped down and was about to go after the lonely girl when Merle put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“We’ll keep our eyes open and deal with him when he shows up. Till then-” he pulled the bottle of gin out from the inside pocket of his west, “we can chill,” he grinned and after receiving a look from Oscar he added defensively, “your words not mine.”

Oscar sighed, “you go ahead, I’m gonna fetch Amy there,” and with that, he went off.

At first Merle didn’t think much about the reasons behind Daryl’s desire to end Tomas’ life. He never questioned his motives. He should have known it wasn’t just because Tomas may look at someone funny when the others agreed so eagerly. Now it kinda made sense why Daryl wouldn’t let Lumen out of his sight. _Oh well there is nothing they can do right now_ , he thought and leaned against the side of the truck to enjoy his smoke while unscrewing the cap to take a swing. 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Oscar purposely dragged his feet on the ground to make some noise, intending not to scare the girl again. She didn’t seem to notice his approach though, so he called “Hi” when he was still far enough from her. She turned after the voice and smiled when she saw him.

“Hi yourself,” she greeted back, looking at him expectantly, waiting for him to tell her what he wanted. He came closer but stayed at a respectful distance.

“You know you shouldn’t be walking around alone, it’s not safe,” he said carefully.

She looked baffled, "but Rick said you cleared this part of the prison. I never go alone outside of the fences."

"Right," he muttered under his breath, he didn't want to start a panic among the women and he couldn't tell her exactly that she should be wary of the prisoners. It would sound as if he was warning her about himself.

So instead he decided to change the subject, keep her company, and hopefully convince her to go back inside later. He looked at the growling corpses at the other side of the fence thinking about what to say, when the obvious question came to him.

“What are you doing here anyway? Don’t you have some emergency situation going on inside? With the old man, I mean.”

She blushed and looked away, “Yeah, I wanted to help, but turned out I was just being in the way. It’s not good. Lumen said he’s in some kind of shock from the blood loss, I don’t remember the name for it. Beth and Maggie keep crying. I just- I needed out.”

He didn’t know what to say to that so he kept quiet. Well he did have something to say, but he wasn't sure if it would be helpful and after few more minutes he decided to give it a shot.

“You know,” he started, not taking his eyes from the fence, “if he doesn’t make it, it’s still good you all would have the opportunity to say goodbye to him.” He glanced at her when he saw no change in her expression he continued. “I have- I mean I had a family, a wife, kids, and now they’re gone, I’ll never see them again and it still doesn't feel real, it’s as if my mind couldn't catch up and process it. So yeah, I think you are better off like this. You know what I mean?”

She looked at him then, “I know what you mean exactly. Before the winter, we were at this farm and it got overrun and we lost my sister there. I never saw what happened to her and I kinda still expecting her to just show up,” she said quietly, teary-eyed. 

They broke the eye contact as the door to the cellblock slammed shut. Oscar looked up to see angry looking Daryl strolling toward them.

"Where's Lumen?" Oscar asked when he saw he's alone.

Daryl roll his eyes. "Apparently I'm making the pregnant lady nervous so the message Lumen is giving her is pointless with me nearby. So I was kindly asked to wait outside. Fucking assholes," he grumbled before looking around when he didn't see his brother. "Merle?" 

“He’s by the truck,” Oscar pointed and sure enough Merle was sitting there with his eyes closed, drinking and smoking.

“I’m gonna grab a smoke too, and if I’ll be lucky steal that bottle from him,” Daryl said and waited for Oscar to go with him.

“Do you wanna come?” Oscar asked Amy, not wanting to leave her alone there unless she went back inside, “I think everybody could use a drink or ten right about now.” 

“Oh, I don’t know, I shouldn’t,” she said not really looking at either of them.

“What? You’re too good to have a drink with us?” Daryl narrowed his eyes at her, any other day he would most likely let it go, but he was just too pissed from earlier.

“No! That’s not what I meant, it’s just- with these things walking around, should any of us be drinking really?” She asked.

Understanding washed over Daryl and he relaxed slightly, “don’t worry, I’m sure there isn’t even left enough for you to get tipsy after my brother being alone with the bottle for so long. There won’t be much left, you'll be happy to have one drink. Come on, let’s go.” 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It turned out Merle was indeed left alone with the gin for too long, because when Lumen finally came out she witnessed what looked like the end of obscene drunken proposition from him to Amy, who was rushing past her back to the cellblock with Oscar on her heels, apologizing. 

It didn’t look like Amy was about to listen to any of his apologies though and Oscar eventually gave up. He was glad she was safe back inside although this wasn’t how he wanted it to happen.

Lumen marched to Merle who was stupidly grinning and started to greet her loudly, but was interrupted by her poking him into the center of his chest with her forefinger.  
“Do you actually want to get laid, Merle? I meant like ever again,” she asked angrily.

“What do you mean if I ever wanted to get laid? What kind of stupid question is that?” He asked, his face transforming from the happy expression to a deep scowl.

“A valid one I’d say. Because the way you talk to women here won’t help you any. It might have worked once on someone who had just too many drinks to know better, but I don’t think you’ll find those girls easily these days.”

“The fuck do you care? Mind your own business and stop ruining my high. I’ll talk however I want to whoever I want,” he spat, not being sure if he was more pissed at her because she was sticking her nose somewhere it didn’t belong or frustrated because she might have a point.

 _High? How?_ She searched his eyes, took in his unbalanced posture and only now realized he was indeed high and probably a bit drunk too. He had found something in the infirmary after all. She spotted Daryl shaking his head at her, indicating there is no point in arguing with Merle right now. Knowing he’s right she decided to end this conversation as quickly as possible.

“I’m not trying to tell you what to do Merle. I’m just saying, if what you are aiming for is getting some, this is not the way and you should consider changing your game a bit. If you just want to piss them off though, then you are doing a great job. That’s all I wanted to say.”

“Whatever!” Merle waved her off, “I’m gonna take a piss.” He threw over his shoulder and marched away.

He did his business and decided to hell with them and to go back inside. Only now when he was moving around he realized he maybe took a bit too much maybe he should have taken it easy on the pills after all the time without, because suddenly he felt as if someone punched him. 

He stumbled once or twice on the stairs but eventually, he managed to get inside of their part of the prison. He didn’t, however, manage to take the right hallway and ended up in front of the showers instead. He looked to the right and to the left in puzzlement, not really sure which way he should go when he heard a muffled noise coming from the inside of the shower room. 

He tried to listen intently if he’d hear it again. For a moment there was only silence and then he heard something again. He fished his knife and walked in on unsteady legs. He looked around the gloomy room, trying to figure what was making the noise when his eyes landed on a small figure curled on the floor under the window.

He blinked trying to clear his vision but the figure was still there, only now he was able to make out the blond hair. It couldn’t be Lumen right? She was still outside, or wasn’t she? Just when he was about to call out the girl lifted her head and he was met with big blue eyes that somehow managed to shine in the shadows of the room. He soon realized they were shining with tears. He remembered this girl, she was all smiles usually.

“You alright there lil’ lady?” he spluttered still wondering if he was imagining her or if she was actually there. She didn’t answer, only shook her hair and hid her face again.

Merle stood there for a moment not sure what to do. His legs had a mind of their own when they closed the distance between him and the girl to lean against the wall. The world started to spin and he slid down and slumped on the ground by her side. He closed his eyes but quickly realized that wasn’t the best idea, so he opened them again just in time to see the girl turning to him and throwing herself to his side. She clung to him and started to sob. 

He glanced down at her, not knowing what to do about it. He awkwardly patted her head, grumbling a quiet “there, there.”

And before he knew what hit him he had a lap full of her. She was kissing him and her hands were caressing his chest, sliding down to open his pant. And that right there was the wake-up call he needed. 

He grabbed her arms and pushed her back growling, “what the hell do you think you’re doing?”

She was staring at him wide-eyed, “I- I thought this is what you wanted. I was just so sad, felt so alone and I’ve- I’ve never, and I thought- and you said-” she stuttered nervously.

“I was kidding you stupid bitch,” he spat showing her off of him. “I’m not deflowering little girls for fuck sake. Get the hell out of here.”

She blinked away the tears that started yet again fall out of her eyes before she scrambled to her feet and ran away.

“Fuck,” he breathed out and sat back, trying to make sense of what just happened before the world around him went black.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Merle woke to someone banging on the door. _A door? Where was he?_ He cracked an eye open to find himself on the couch in their shared room. _How did he get here?_ His memories were foggy. _Did he take a shower?_ Still looking around he heard the door being open and Oscar’s tired voice.

“What?”

“Have you seen Beth?” Came the frantic answer. “She never came back yesterday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very sorry about the late update. A tragedy isn't picky and visited too close for my liking and when I finally started to feel like writing again, I got stuck... 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter :-)


	8. Chapter 8

Merle tried hard to make sense of what was happening, but his brain just wouldn’t cooperate. He heard Oscar talking to whoever was at the door but couldn’t make out the words. He managed to sit up on the couch and slowly look around. He tried to remember how he got there.

The room was still gloomy so it must be early. Flashes of the previous day popped inside his head. The pills, the drinking, more pills, _did he have a fight with Lumen?_ He remembered being pissed at her. That hasn't happened for a while now. Then nothing, no memory of how he got back in the room, but a flash of the shower room and Beth sitting on his lap kissing him went through his mind. _Fuck! What did he do?_

He put his arm on the backrest and turned to look over it. In the doorway the black guy from the other group was hovering, the one with the weird name, something about hounds. Merle stared at him, watching how nervous he seemed to be until a banging on the door made him close his eyes. He felt a bad migraine coming his way.

“Hey guys! Come out!” Oscar shouted through the door behind which Daryl and Lumen were most likely still sleeping, trying to wake them up.

“Keep it down would you?” Merle’s voice came out raspy and he cleared his throat trying to help it. He looked around and spotted a bottle of water on the coffee table in front of him. He didn’t think about who put it there, he grabbed it and chugged down almost half of it.

“Oh, good morning to you too, dumb ass!” Oscar turned from the door.

“What the-” Merle started but was cut off.

“We found you snoring in the showers, then we had to carry your sorry ass here so you wouldn’t get eaten if anything happened. So next time you decide it’s good day to get high, just don’t.”

“Whatever.” Merle waved him off and leaned his head against the headrest, closing his eyes again he waited for the water to settle down in his stomach. 

He heard Oscar sigh, a door being opened and then Lumen’s tired voice. “What is it? Theodore? What are you doing here?” _Oh yeah T, T-Dog, that was the stupid name._

“It’s Beth. We can’t find her anywhere. Maggie was the last one who saw her when she relieved her from the Hershel watch yesterday. Everybody thought she’s just hiding somewhere because-. You know Hershel’s condition and she’s taking it obviously not well. But when she didn’t show for breakfast today we started to look and she’s nowhere to be found. Have you seen her by any chance?”

 _Beth_ , Merle didn’t move but his heart started to beat so fast he was beginning to worry he might be in danger of heart attack. 

“No, I haven’t, sorry.” He heard Lumen answer, her voice much more alert than before, then footsteps and suddenly she was shaking his shoulder. “Hey, Merle? Merle! Wake up.” He just grunted to let her know he’s up, he wasn’t ready to look at her yet. “Have you seen Beth? You know which one is Beth right?”

“No,” he rasped, putting his arm over his eyes. He wasn’t even sure why he lied at that point. But as more flashes of last night begun to show, like Beth crying, her hands on his belt, her crying more... he just couldn’t, wouldn’t tell them. Just no.

Lumen shook him one more time, “no, as in you haven’t seen her? Or no, as in you don’t know who Beth is?”

He took a deep breath and lifted his arm a bit to look at her with one narrowed eye. “I know who she is damn it. I haven’t seen her.” Despite his hurting head he stood up and looked at T-Dog. “Why do you keep letting them girls wander around by themselves all the time anyway? Are you all that stupid?” 

“He’s right,” Oscar said, nodding in agreement, “every time I walk out I see Amy outside, _alone_.”

T-Dog’s eyes went wide, “wha-shit!”

“What?” Oscar and Merle said almost at the same time.

“She said she’ll go check the yard when we started looking,” he said already turning around, “I don’t think anyone went with her,” he uttered over his shoulder, hurrying down the hallway. 

“Fucking unbelievable.” Oscar cursed under his breath, He went to the door and watch T-Dog running in the direction of the yard exit. He checked the left side only to see Rick talking to Axel at the other end of the hallway, by the cellblock D entry. They greeted each other with a nod, Rick’s eyes slid behind Oscar and seeing T-Dog swiftly disappear around the corner at the end of the hallway he raised his eyebrows questioningly. Oscar just shook his head and went back to the room, closing the door behind him.

Lumen glanced from him to the door and back. “Aren’t we going to help them to look for her?”

Oscar opened his mouth to answer but was beat by Daryl, who was now coming out of their room to join them. “No, it’s not our problem.”

“What? But-”

“I’ll go.” Oscar offered. “I wanna at least check on Amy, those morons act like they just got to their country house for a vacation. We all should be more on guard.”

“I’ll go too.” Merle’s raspy voice earned a surprised look from everyone in the room. “What?” he asked, looking at the stunned faces around him. “We agreed on not going anywhere alone, didn’t we? Can’t have this one’s ass eaten somewhere.” He nonchalantly motioned to Oscar, who snorted in response. 

Oscar and Lumen shared a look, both entertaining the idea of reminding Merle where he was found just yesterday, _alone_ , but decided against it. There was a more pressing issue and honestly, there was no point in saying anything. 

“I’m gonna go with you,” Lumen said, nodding her head as if she just agreed with herself.

“No, you won’t.” Daryl's face hardened. He was not about to compromise here.

“What do you mean _‘you won’t’_ , sure I will,” she answered perplexed.

“I mean what I said. You’re staying with me.” Not even waiting for her response he went around her to look for something to eat.

“So we both go,” she tried to offer.

“No we won’t, it’s not our problem,” he didn’t even blink.

“But,” she looked around herself at Merle and Oscar who were starting to get ready, “They’re going, and I wanna help, it’s not like I’m gonna be running around alone, and I’m sure Maggie will be going too.”

“So? I don’t give a shit. Maggie’s not my girl. Stop acting like a little brat, you’re not going anywhere.”

“You can’t tell me what I can or can’t do like this.” 

“Sure I can, I just did. Tell me, who’s gonna stop me.” He stood with his back turned to her as he rummaged through the cupboards. 

She looked behind her only to see Merle and Oscar both lifting their hands in the air, hinting they were staying out of the argument. Getting frustrated she turned back to face Daryl.

“What the hell is this? I know this whole civilization collapse seems to catapult us back into the middle age but that doesn’t mean you gonna boss me around without talking it through at all. Even your brother treats me as his equal and that’s saying something!” She said pointing at Merle behind her without looking.

“Oh really, an equal? From what I saw he says jump and you ask how high.” Daryl gave up on the food search for now. 

She opened her mouth to argue that, but quickly realized she really did what Merle asked without much of a questioning. They got to that point in time they spent together on the road. She glanced back at Merle as if looking for support which she didn’t get. Merle just shrugged, a wide grin spreading on his face while he went back to tying his boots. 

So after clearing her throat she tried again. "Well, I know he's doing what's best for me and my safety. And he's always open to a discussion, unlike you apparently."

She left out that said discussion almost never end up in favor of her proposition because that wasn't what this was about. This was about him telling her that she's not allowed to go help someone without giving a reason. This was about him telling her she's not allowed to make her own decisions. 

Daryl didn’t look impressed though. He reached out, grabbed Lumen’s hand and dragged her to their room. He slammed the door behind them not wanting to argue in front of his brother and Oscar any longer. 

Lumen shrugged his hand off as soon as the grip got lighter and angrily folded her arms over her chest, thinking the manhandling just proved her point. 

“See, you’re acting like some sexist brute,” she whisper-shouted, not wanting Oscar or Merle to listen in on them either. 

But Daryl was pissed too, and she realized that a second too late. It’s been a long time since the last time she saw the look he now wore on his face, and it started to make her slightly nervous.

“Believe me, I’m all for equality,” his mouth turned into a wicked sneer as he started stalking toward her, making her back away from him.  
“Men, women, it never made no difference to me, except which I preferred to fuck. Where I’m concerned we’re all just people. Do you know how I’m so sure about it? Because I never felt any differently about who I killed. I took them all in the same way, to the same place, they all got the same ties and I cut their air supplies in the exact same fashion. Because no snooty bitch deserves a special treatment just because she owns a pussy between her legs,” he hissed while searching her face for a reaction during his whole speech, and he got it too. 

Her eyes dropped to the ground. He saw her breathing to speed up. Her arms slowly slid down from their place on her chest and she started to play with her fingers nervously. This was the very first time Daryl talked freely about the killing he’s done and this was not how she imagined the conversation to go. 

She certainly wasn’t prepared for the fear creeping its way inside of her.

Daryl wasn’t happy about this either but he preferred her being scared to her roaming around searching for Beth only to be snatched and hurt by Tomas. Still, seeing her expression he straighten up, backing away from her in the process to give her some space and continued, “I treat men and women the same when the situation calls for it. This,” he motioned around him, “ this is not me being sexist, it’s being realistic. You are no fighter, darling. I know Merle’s been teaching you some, but you’re a woman and no matter how equal to me I see you, you just don’t have the means to win against a man. Being able to kill dead people doesn’t help you to fight living ones.” Her eyes shot up then and seeing the confusion washing over her face he asked. “There are two more people missing around here, so you do realize what most likely happened to Beth, right?”

It took her moment, but the pieces seemed to click in the end. Her mouth popped open and her expression turned horrified as the realization settled in, “Jesus,” she breathed out. He gave her a curt nod, hoping she’ll see the reason now, “Daryl we can’t just not do something,” she whispered. Daryl held her gaze for a moment before he shook his head no. “Daryl…” she trailed off, thinking about the possibilities. Daryl obviously didn’t want her to be a part of the search party, and for a solid reason, so she tried again, offering something a bit different, “Merle’s going and I wanted to go check on Hershel anyway. How about I stay in the other cellblock while you help look for her then.”

“Yeah, because they are doing such a great job guarding that place.” He snorted.

“We don’t know how she got lost. Let’s at least talk to them,” she reached out and tentatively laid her palm on his arm, “Daryl please, there could be a time when something happens to me. How would you feel if all the people here wouldn’t help you look for me saying it’s _not their problem_. There is no police, nothing, no one to call for help. People just have to help each other now.” 

She saw his cheek twitch at the image she just painted for him. He knew how he would feel, he’d be pissed either way. But thinking about this, maybe this is a good opportunity to finally deal with Tomas. He wouldn’t take Lumen with him for that anyway if he could help it.

“Okay,” he gave in, “we’re gonna talk to them. I’ll help with the search if needed, but you stay with whoever is staying behind in their cellblock, locked, until I get back, agreed?” He asked, his face serious not leaving any room for more compromise. 

“Alright,” she agreed immediately and went to move around him only to be stopped by his hand that shot up to grab her arm again. He more felt than saw her jump under the touch. Cursing internally he moved her back in front of him, searching her face. She was now looking at him, though she didn’t seem to be anywhere near to be comfortable.

“You know I said what I did because your safety matters to me too, right?”

She gulped dryly, the lack of saliva reminding her she didn’t have anything to eat or drink yet that morning. She took all her courage and asked what she really wanted. “You mean abou-about you killing people? Why _did_ you say that? Did you want to scare me into listening to you or something?” 

He let go of her, put his thumb in his mouth and started to chew on it. If she didn’t know any better she’d think he was more uncomfortable to talk about it than she was.

“No, no that’s not why I did. I said it because it’s the truth. Because I do see women in general equal to men. I don’t treat people worse or better based on their gender. I do think there are situations where women simply can’t compete though, like now, when I’m very sure there is a man, stronger than you, who would hurt you if he was given the opportunity. And I’m not about to give it to him. You get the why now, right?”

“Yeah, I do,” Lumen sighed, “I’d get it if you had explained it to me right away too, you know?” 

Stepping closer she grabbed the hand he was still chewing on and tugged it away from his mouth, never letting go of that hand she put her other palm on his cheek and started to caress him slowly while looking into his eyes.

“I know you _know_ you can talk to me. You don’t need to-just, talk to me next time, okay?”

“Alright,” Daryl rasped quietly, although he thought it was necessary to scare her at least a little when she didn’t want to listen to him to prevent her possible desire to play a hero. He would do that right away next time then.

They joined Oscar and Merle in the other room for a quick breakfast because there is no point in going on search starving. By the time they got in the cellblock C all of the others were there too, including Axel who was standing on the side, watching them talk over the plan with a frown on his face. He didn’t try to interfere though. When he saw the four of them coming he greeted them quietly and then explained that not only another girl went missing, but Big Tiny was nowhere to be found either. 

Rick was just trying to sort out where would who go to make the search the most efficient. He was about to address Axel when he noticed he was no longer standing alone. He eyed the group but Oscar beat him to talking.

“We’re here to help. I mean Merle, Daryl and myself. Lumen’s here to check on the old man and she would stay here while we look.” He explained.

“Okay, good,” Rick said obviously relieved, “we can cover more ground like that, thanks.”

Just then Carl emerged from the cellblock, his gun ready, but Rick immediately stepped in his way.

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

“I’m going with you,” Carl replied matter-of-factly.

“No, Carl, I need you to stay here, okay?” Rick said, his eyes looking for Lori.

“No, I want to help to look for Beth and Amy. You’re all going, it’s not like I’m going to be alone.” Carl motioned around him to all the people standing in the room.

Daryl smirked at hearing this conversation. He rounded on Lumen, his eyebrow raised, he whispered, “little brat. Remind you of someone?”

She blushed at her own almost identical childish response she gave him only half an hour or so ago. She quickly recovered though remembering Daryl acting like an asshole. She looked back at Rick only to see him handing Carl the keys from the cellblock and asking him to guard it and everyone who’s staying while he’s gone. She moved to go in, to check on Hershel and talk to Lori intending to leave proudly when Daryl caught her arm again and turned her to look at him.

“Don’t leave here until me or Merle come back to get you,” he didn’t like leaving her, but they had to deal with Tomas and Andrew, the sooner the better.

For a second she thought about pointing out he’s being bossy _again_ , but seeing how tense he was and knowing he didn’t want to go in the first place, she swallowed the remark and only nodded, “yeah, I’ll be here,” she gave him quick pack on the lips, “thank you for doing this.” 

He nodded back. “You got your gun?”

“Yes, my knife too,” she motioned to her hip where it was sheathed.  
“Be safe,” she said to all of them and went to join Lori and Carl behind the bars which he locked as soon as she was there.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The whole search was a bust. They systematically searched the yards, towers and every single shed they could enter. They continued inside and searched the cafeteria, the showers, the cellblock D once again, every single storeroom and even the room Daryl, Merle, Oscar, and Lumen was staying in. 

But nothing. 

They searched together, then they split into four teams, Merle with Daryl, Oscar with Axel, Rick with T-Dog and Glenn with Maggie and searched the whole place again, just to be sure no one could be walking around them. It felt like they were on it for hours and they probably really were. But still nothing.

They were all now taking a break in the cafeteria, trying to figure what to do next. At that point, Merle got himself together. The hours of searching helped to straighten up his head. Now he felt guilty. Somehow he couldn’t shake the feeling they wouldn’t be all searching for the girls now if he was sober last night. Maybe if he was right in the head he would walk her back to her people, she was still just a kid for Christ's sake.

“Five people don’t just disappear into thin air,” Maggie cried out frustrated, angry and scared for her little sister, interrupting his train of thought.

“Maybe they’re no longer here,” Axel offered.

“I don’t think so,” T-Dog shook his head, “Amy was here just this morning, they would have to go back for her.”

“Hey, guys,” Glenn’s voice piped out, barely audible, “I know one corner of this place is ruined, but why aren’t we looking in the A wing?” He asked nervously, his eyes jumping from one face to another, seeing all of them watching him as if he was crazy. He wasn’t with them when they cleared the rest of the prison though so he had no idea what’s up with the cellblock A, safe for hearing somewhere there should be offices.

“It’s not cleared yet,” Rick said, rubbing his face tiredly. “They would have to clear it themselves if they wanted to… hide there,” his voice getting slower and slower as he realized they very well could have done it. That part should be for staff mostly, maybe there weren't that many walkers to kill. There just wasn’t really time to check it yet. He looked around, seeing he wasn’t the only one with that thought in mind.

“Fuck!” Oscar cursed, already moving to the door. 

They all hurried down the hallway to the cellblock A door. Oscar reached for the handle to open it but thought better of it.  
“How are we going to do this?” He asked instead.

“We have to check if it’s really clear first,” Rick stressed, “we can’t risk being overrun.”

“Alright, we’re doing it like this,” Merle opened his mouth for the first time since they left their room. “We go in, and if it looks okay from the start we continue. We stay in the teams we're working now. We go in slow and check every office, every room, every fucking closet, to be sure we’re not leaving any biters behind.” 

“There are two floors there.” Oscar pointed out, “what if something comes from the one we are not in?”

“Two teams go up, two down then,” Merle said while motioning to members of Rick groups as teams staying up and to his brother, Oscar, and Axel as team going down.

The plan wasn’t met with any objections and so Oscar once again reached for the door and slowly cracked them open only to be met with a messy but quiet hallway. They one by one went through that door and then locked it behind them. They went through the first few offices finding them empty too. 

“Maybe the staff fled when the riot started,” Axel offered, trying to unsuccessfully ease the tension. 

Continuing to the stairway they found their first dead, really dead walker, laying on the bottom of it.

“Looks like you were right,” Daryl addressed Glenn who didn’t look slightly happy about being right about this.

“Okay, we’re going down I guess then.” Axel said and started down the stairs, Oscar, Merle and Daryl following behind him, while the rest continued the search on the upper level.

It was darker much darker downstairs so they lighten up their flashlights. The hallway divided in two, on one side was several ordinary doors, on the other side was one bigger one.  
“You two go left, we check this one,” Merle motioned to the bigger door. Oscar and Axel nodded and went off the other way.

When he and Daryl opened a door into what looked like the generator room. When they stepped in, the first thing Merle noticed was the smell. It was almost impossible not to, the smell was heavy and hung in the hair, practically slapping him in the face. It would be surely more sickening if he wasn’t used to it but he knew the smell of blood. This smell was a bit different than that of the animals though. This was sweet and metallic, it blanketed the air seemingly with no intention to ever leave. It might've been different, maybe not as bad if the blood had more time to thicken and age, but this was fresh.

Walking further into the room, they saw the corpse quickly, it's feet first, pointed in their direction as it lay on the floor. Approaching the body, it was soon confirmed as Big Tiny, the blood spattered on the walls and pooled around the upper part of his body. Merle and Daryl shared a look, seeing the pool of blood they didn't bother to look for a pulse. 

They made their way slowly further to the room and in the passing they could see Tiny’s eyes wide open, fixed and vacant. They went around the corner and saw the second reason for that smell. Small body tied up, hanging in the air by its arms. The head full of blond hair was hanging down. And more blood, on her, under her, everywhere.

“Which one is it?” Daryl’s low voice sounded unbecoming in the quiet room.

“That’s Beth,” Merle said and rushed to her, to cut off the ropes. He was almost in front of her when her head shot up and the feeling of relief soon vanished as he was met with her lifeless eyes and snapping mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so very sorry for how long you had to wait for this update…, I won’t bother you with why’s, let’s just say I want to keep this story a thing I do for fun. So I’m not going to promise weekly updates as I clearly am not able to keep that up.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the chapter :-) leave a comment if you want.


	9. Chapter 9

The horrifying confirmation of Beth’s faith stopped Merle in his tracks. The abrupt move made his foot slip but he managed to straighten himself just in time to not fall.  
“Fuck!” He swore.

“Quiet,” Daryl hissed. 

Merle was about to shout at him to shove his rebukes up his ass but shut his mouth when he saw Daryl having his crossbow at ready, stalking quietly to the side motioning to the open space at the end of the wall dividing the big room into two areas. Merle forced himself to not look back at Beth since she couldn’t be helped anymore and moved to follow his brother. 

They trod carefully around the mess on the floor, to not give away their location, moving closer and closer when Merle’s eyes shot to Daryl. He heard it too now, the muffled whimper coming from the other side. Before either of them had a chance to do anything though Andrew suddenly emerged from the opening and sprinted around them in the direction of the door leading to the hallway.

Daryl bolted after him. When he got to the now open door he saw Axel already chasing after Andrew screaming for the others upstairs to block him. Hearing response from Rick, Daryl decided there are enough people going after Andrew while his brother would stay alone in the generator room where Tomas most likely was still hiding. 

He was about to turn when he spotted Oscar at the other end of the hallway and motioned for him to come join them. Oscar pointed to the door in front of him and made a gesture between his eyes and said door to communicate he’s gonna check it out. Then he motioned between himself and Daryl, to let him know he’ll come after that. Daryl nodded his understanding and went to back. 

Beth was still snapping her mouth uselessly, trying to bite something. Daryl watched her for a moment before he got annoyed and marched right to her, shouldering his crossbow he took out his knife and was about to shove it into her brain when Merle’s voice stopped him.

“Wait,” Merle whisper shouted, “don’t, just- don’t.”

“What? You wanna have her here snapping at us?” Daryl hissed back. 

Merle shook his head, but before he could reply they heard another muffled whimper and a muffled cry that followed right after. Forgetting their argument about Beth, they both moved to the opening. Merle peeked around the wall into the other part of the room.

Tomas was there, just as they expected. He was trying silently the small windows, which apparently wouldn't budge, and he was dragging Amy behind him. She had her hands tied behind her back and some rag secured in her mouth by another one. One look at the state of her clothes, or rather the lack of it made it quite clear what Tomas or maybe both of them managed to do to her before they were found.

At least she was still alive.

Merle pointed for Daryl where was Tomas standing and whispered so quietly it seemed he only mouthed the words.

“I only saw a knife in his hand, didn’t see the gun.”

Daryl nodded and responded in the same manner, ”don’t mean he doesn’t have it. The girl?”

“She’s there, alive.”

“Okay, we are not letting him go, that clear? If she walks away okay, fine. If he’d want to use her as a leverage we are not letting him,” Daryl said, his face serious as ever. There was no way he was chancing letting the asshole go and risking him hurting Lumen.

“Agreed.” Merle grunted. Not that he wished for Amy to die, but he was not about to let him walk away either.

They walked around the corner, crossbow, and gun at ready. 

Their movements caused Tomas to turn around abruptly and jerked Amy in front of him as a human shield. "Stay where you are!" He shouted, "or I'll slit her throat." 

“Oh yeah?” Daryl smirked, “and what you’d do next, dumbass. I don’t give a shit about her. I just want to see you dead.” The smirk on his face only grew bigger. “I bet my brother here would take a round with her too if he had the chance, so go on, kill her, let’s see what happens next.”

Merle wore his poker face, not giving away anything. He saw Amy's eyes go even wider which didn't seem to be even possible a second ago with how frightened she looked. She was shaking like a leaf too.

Thomas, on the other hand, looked just baffled by this answer. His hand lowered as his mind worked out what he just heard. He had no idea if Daryl was bluffing or not.

That little drop that caused the knife move away from Amy's neck was all Daryl needed though. He let the bolt fly and it sunk into Tomas' shoulder. He cried out and stumbled back cutting Amy's right arm in the process before he dropped the knife completely.

The sudden loss of the support of his arm resulted in her collapsing to the ground as her legs wouldn't keep her up. She tried to crawl away as fast as she could with her hands tied until she hit the corner where she stayed, watching the men in the room with wide eyes. 

Tomas landed against the wall behind him moving his left hand to the injured shoulder as if to tug the bolt out but Daryl was already there. He slapped Tomas hand away and roughly turned him to his side, ignoring his painful cries and held his hands with his own at a painful angle. Daryl then leaned closer and hissed in Tomas ear.

“No, no, no, we can’t take that out. We wouldn’t want you to bleed out too quickly now, would we? Because I’ve got a feeling my brother is out for a lot more blood.” He chuckled darkly before turning his head to check on Amy. 

It looked like Merle was trying to talk to her but she was hysterical, kicking at him, crying, and shaking her head violently. It looked like she didn’t think they were bluffing at all.

“It’s alright, I just wanna help you.” Merle was repeating over and over from his spot, not moving any closer, but it seemed she didn’t hear him at all. 

At that moment Oscar rounded the corner.

“Axel said Rick, T, Glenn, and Maggie took over chasing Andrew. But he wanted to stay by the door leading to the cleared area just in case...” he trailed off, his eyes landed on Amy who quietened a bit after hearing his voice and was now staring at him. Her eyes red and puffy from all the crying. She was a mess.

“Why, um, why won’t you take that pig to the other room?” Oscar suggested. 

Tomas opened his mouth but Daryl made him howl in pain instead of whatever bullshit he was about to let out of his mouth with one hard squeeze of his shoulder. Catching on what Oscar wanted, he motioned with his head for Merle to go with him.

At first Oscar thought he’ll do better without Tomas, who obviously hurt her, and Merle, who was obviously upsetting her further, in the room. But once he was alone with her he didn’t quite know what to do, or how to approach her. 

They could hear Merle and Daryl were busy with the scumbag on the other side of the wall. The voices, especially the one that worked as a reminder certainly didn’t help with calming her down. 

She started to sob quietly and curled her legs in front of her in a futile attempt to hide her body. The only thing she had still on was the rest of her shirt, that lingered on her shoulders after the front was torn or cut open. 

_Well at least she’s stopped kicking around_ , Oscar thought, not really sure if he should talk to her or not. He didn’t want to set her off again, but he couldn’t leave her on the cold floor forever either.

So he made up his mind, “Amy?” He called her name in a hoarse voice. Her eyes lifted to him instantly but that was about the only response he got. _So far so good, still no hysterics_. He raised his hands palm up and made a step in her direction, but seeing her body tense he stopped.

“Hey now, we are friends, right? I wouldn’t hurt you.” He almost choked on the words. Seeing Beth in the other room and now this. He heard the stories but actually seeing it, it was a bit too much for him. He gulped several times before he tried again.

“I have to get you out of here alright?” He looked around and seeing the abandoned knife on the floor he pointed to it. He watched her eyes follow where his finger was pointing and after seeing it they shot back to him. “I gotta cut the ties,” he explained, “I can give you my shirt if you let me, I just want to get out of here.”

She searched his face for a moment and something snapped in her. Maybe it was seeing how uncomfortable he looked himself, maybe it was just his presence, but suddenly the only thing she wanted was to get off of this filthy floor. So she nodded urgently, her eyes shifting between him and the blade laying by.

Oscar let out a breath he wasn't even aware of holding and moved to grab the knife, his face staying turned in Amy’s direction. He then walked to her and knelt by her side motioning for her to turn her back to him, which she did right away. He proceeded to cut the clothes that were holding her hands. It took a minute because it was tight and digging into her skin, and he didn’t want to cut her. 

Once he was done she moved her arms in front of her hissing in pain when one of the shoulders wouldn’t move right. She used the other hand to tear off the rags from her mouth and tried to spit out the nauseating taste, but her mouth was dry. She took several deep breaths before she turned her head back to Oscar who was still kneeling behind her. She looked into his eyes, then her gaze slid down to his chest, or rather to his undershirt.

“Can I have that shirt now, please.” She asked softly and his heart about broke hearing the polite question after the ordeal she went through. 

“Yeah, yes of course,” he said, already peeling the wifebeater from his body. 

She took it from him and put it on instantly. Amy wasn't exactly small, but compared to him, he still dwarfed her, and so his shirt went low enough to give her the feeling of being covered. When she was done he stood up and offered her his hand to help her up, which she accepted without any hesitation. Once she got on her feet though, her knees buckled and he caught her just in time before she fell.

“Alright, up you go,” he said and went to take her to his arms to carry her.

“No, wait,” she stopped him, “from the other side,” she nodded to her right, and then explained further seeing his questioned look, “my left shoulder hurts.”

“The cut on the right arm gonna sting though,” he warned moving around her while still holding her up, “I’m sweaty.”

She looked down at her body before she replied, “I don’t think that will bother me more than anything else that’s hurting right now.”

"Right" He decided he better stop talking.

Carefully lifted her up and after making sure she's secure in his arms he moved out. 

When they rounded the corner he saw that in a mean time Daryl and Merle tied Tomas to a pipe leading by the wall, the bolt still in his shoulder. He moved around what used to be Beth so Amy’s back was to her. He debated if he should warn her not to look, but glancing down he saw she had no intention to do so. Her head was bowed, her stare fixed on her hands resting in her lap.

He nodded at the brothers and hurried out of the room. On the stairs, he bumped into the rest of the search party. Amy didn’t look up, she didn’t acknowledge them at all.

“Andrew?” Oscar asked immediately.

“Dead,” Rick answered, “he ran right into the walkers in the yard.”

“Beth?” Maggie asked, her horrified eyes scanning Amy’s body.

Oscar shook his head, “I wouldn’t go down there either if I were you. Dixons got it under control.” 

But Maggie didn’t listen. She was already running down the stairs and Glenn rushed after her, trying to convince her not to go. 

Oscar looked at the remaining men still blocking his way. They all realized that fact at the same time and moved to the side, and unlike Maggie, they looked anywhere but Amy. Both reactions made Oscar angry for some reason. He huffed and took the stairs by two to be away from them as fast as possible.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Back in the room, Tomas realized pretty quickly he was not getting out of this and decided to spend his last moments by annoying the hell out of both Dixon brothers. He taunted them, and teased them, he was saying disgusting things about both Amy and Beth, and while Daryl was fully prepared for some kind of ramble and intended to wait it out, as it was a quite usual phenomenon among his victims, Merle’s blood started to boil after the second sentence. 

He marched to Tomas and with one well-aimed blow he knocked him out. He was breathing fast and as much as he tried to calm himself, he wasn’t successful. He turned to Daryl who was standing calm as a cucumber at the side and asked, for the very first time in their whole lives.

“How do you do this?”

Daryl raised his eyebrows in a mild surprise but answered anyway, “you just have to wait. Most of them go through this tough phase, but it’ll pass eventually. There’s where the fun begins, I usually have a beer during the boring rambling and tune them out,” he explained lazily. 

Merle stared at him for a moment trying to stop his brain from processing how dismissing and casual Daryl was about people he killed. This exactly was the reason why he chose to turn his back on this matter and never even attempted discussing it with his brother. Because they might be assholes, as Daryl put it, but what does that even mean for Daryl? He hates all humankind, except for Lumen and apparently him on occasion. That doesn’t mean all the other people were just waiting for Daryl’s picking when he decided they deserve to die.

This particular asshole in front of them was another case entirely. One glance at the still swaying and snapping blond corps behind him was a reminder strong enough to forget about other people. The anger flowing through his veins made him close his eyes and ask again. The question he really wanted to know.

“No, I mean, how do you kill them, to let them suffer. I want this fucker to suffer.”

Daryl shrugged. “I dunno, I don’t think I ever made anyone suffer much, to be honest. Well maybe that Impala guy,” he said more to himself than to Merle before motioning to Tomas, “you wanna make this one suffer? Go ahead, I’ll let you have him. You seem to be in need of letting out some steam anyway,” Daryl smiled, actually smiled, “you know how the body works.”

Merle was perplexed by the whole situation. He felt as if he just entered Twilight zone because he realized that he did want to make the scum suffer. He was actually looking forward to it. It was true that Merle was no stranger to inflicting pain, but it was always more like beat up someone to get money back or scare someone into doing something. Now though, he was more than ready to break Tomas every finger just as an appetizer.

Daryl, on the other hand, was not unsettled in the slightest. He enjoyed every second of this. It was like his brother was seeing him clearly for the first time and what was even better, they were together in this, really together. He could see it in Merle’s eyes. He was ready. 

“You know,” Daryl continued, “I think that little Beth here is hungry, maybe we could save some of him for her to snack on,” he suggested, waiting for Merle’s reaction. For a second there he looked as if he was going to be sick, but it passed and his eyes hardened. 

“I think you’re right. She could use a snack.” Merle's eyes slid behind him on the small figure he tried to avoid since they entered the room again.

“But not right away,” Daryl said, leaning against the wall behind him, “he’d bleed out too fas-” he was cut off by the door being open and arguing voices. 

Quite hysterical Maggie walked in but halted in her steps as soon as she saw the hanging body. Her knees almost gave away. Glenn grabbed her arms to steady her, but she swatted his hands away and stumbled toward her sister. She reached out but jerked her hand away when the walker that was once her little sister tried to bite her outstretched fingers off.

“Why did you leave her like this?!” Maggie shouted at the two of them, her eyes full of tears. She was about to pull her knife out when Merle stopped her.

“Don’t do it! Not yet.” 

“What?” She shrieked, a look of disbelief on her face, “are you serious right now?” 

At that point Rick, T-Dog, and Axel entered the room as well. They all took the scene in front of them in. T-Dog turned around and walked out almost immediately. Axel cursed under his breath and followed him, not really wanting to see the girl or whatever was about to happen to Tomas. Rick inspected the situation and then his gaze fell to the ground.

“What about the other one?” Merle asked.

Rick raised his head then, “dead.”

“Good.” Merle nodded. 

Maggie was about to say something else but Daryl pushed himself from the wall motioning for her to wait and moved closer. He stopped right next to her and said quietly. 

“I know you probably don’t want to, but look at her body. You see the blood? Look closely, it’s everywhere. And it was that man’s doing,” he pointed at Tomas, “he cut her and broke her bones and I would bet my life he raped her in all ways a man can.”

Maggie turned to him, anger in her eyes. Yes. That's what he wanted to see. He cut in before she managed to say anything.

“Now we, me and my brother, we’re going to make him suffer for that and that’s why we need you to leave your sister as she is for a little longer,” he waited if it’ll sink in and when she looked more confused than anything else he clarified, “we want to feed him to her... while he watches.”

After that statement Glenn’s skin lost several shades of color. He turned around and quickly left the room, looking rather sick. 

Maggie lost that confused look and her face hardened. She didn’t spare a glance to the monster that humiliated, mutilated and murdered her sister. She kept the eye contact with Daryl and saw he meant every word. Maggie wasn’t a violent person, but at this particular moment all she wanted was for Daryl and Merle to do exactly what he said.

"You'll bring her to me after." It was more of a statement than a question but Daryl nodded anyway. And so Maggie looked one last time at her sister, nodded, and then turned to leave the room.

When she neared the door Rick caught her arm, “are you seriously leaving? Letting them torture him?”

Maggie shook his hand off of her before answering, “Are you seriously asking that question? Look at her!” She hissed while pointing behind her at Beth’s body.

Rick rubbed his face, “I know what he did, believe me, I do see it. But let’s just shoot him then.”

“You do whatever you want Rick, I’m leaving,” she said and did just that. 

Rick looked from Merle to Daryl, his hand itching above the revolver in the holster by his thigh. But a flesh of Amy curled in Oscar’s arms and the everlasting snapping sound of Beth’s jaws somehow shut up whatever argument he had for the mercy of quick kill for Tomas. Without another word he left the room too.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It took quite some time before Tomas regained consciousness again. Merle asked about the most effective ways to hurt him and keep him alive for as long as possible, but Daryl said it will be better to discuss that when he’ll wake up. And so they just waited. 

After some time, they Daryl proposed to rearrange Tomas around the pipes for better access to certain parts. Merle helped him do that without questions. At one point Daryl even went to the cafeteria for something to drink and eat. Although Merle refused the food he was looking forward to the water.

While he was waiting for Daryl to return he took out the plastic bottle with the rest of the pills. He debated taking one for this. Thinking it would help if he got cold feet after all. But then he looked at the blond and felt almost as if it were mocking him for this weakness and blaming him at the same time. At the end, he put it back in his pocket. He had to get rid of it. Maybe he’d give it to Lumen to do whatever with it. Daryl came back soon after and they waited together.

First thing Tomas was aware of was shooting pain in his head. He tried to reach for it only to realize he couldn’t move his hand. He looked to his right to find his arm outstretched and tied to the pipe in four places. He looked to his left to find his left arm secured in the same way. He looked around and it didn’t take his brain long to catch up. 

He wanted to smirk at Merle but he couldn’t quite get his muscles to listen to him and he felt like throwing up. Which he almost did.

“Watch out for puking, I think you gave him a concussion,” Daryl said from his spot by the wall. Tomas began to chuckle.

“You two are just amateurs. Go fuck yourself, look at that,” he nodded to Beth, “that’s how it’s done.” 

Merle did look at Beth and his blood started to boil again. But Daryl got through to him before he even moved.

“Ignore him. It’s just false bravado. He knows he’s fucked, he just wants you to snap and do it fast,” Daryl smirked and looking right in Tomas' eyes he added, “which we won’t.” He then focused on his brother, “you got the hands ready, you can start there, just don’t cut yet, we wouldn’t want to lose him too soon,” Daryl suggested since Merle, although pissed, looked kinda lost.

Merle stepped closer trying to tune down the bullshit coming out of Tomas' mouth and stared at his right hand. It’s easy to say start, but start how? When suddenly he saw Daryl appear beside him and he was pushed aside, not harshly. “Here,” Daryl said quietly as if he was just helping him open a can or something and then he took Tomas little fingers and band it until they heard a sickening crack. Tomas words turned to a scream right away and Daryl stepped back motioning for Merle to take over. Which he did. 

Tomas passed out between sixth and seventh finger and so they waited for him to wake up only to start again. When they were done dislocating his fingers Daryl pointed to his toes to which Merle said, “there is no way I’m going anywhere near his feet.”

“Fair enough,” Daryl shrugged and handed Merle pliers he found while waiting on Tomas to wake, “the nails then.” 

And so Merle took the tool and moved back to Tomas right hand, only now they didn’t have to wait for him to pass out too long. He did after the second nail was out. 

Merle and Daryl spent more water to splash Tomas than to drink it. But after some time Tomas was successfully nailless. He was hanging there, being held up by the restraint on his arms, drooling on the ground and only whined and moaned. The bravado persona inside him has died.

“I was thinking,” Daryl started, “I ate all that food and we let our guest here starving, how rude of us.” 

Tomas just whimpered, his thoughts nowhere near food, he was feeling sick, not hungry.

“Look at her,” Daryl continued, “she looks like she could use a bite of something, right?” 

At that Tomas' head shot up at that, “No, no, no, no, no…..” he chanted over and over while Daryl tightened a rope around his thigh and showed Merle where to cut.

The screaming wouldn’t stop and Merle himself started to feel his own stomach turn a bit, but he got the job done. He held the flesh he removed in front of Tomas' face, feeling sickeningly satisfied by the horror filled wide stare he received from him. He then held it out for Daryl who was up until now watching the scene with hungry eyes. It never occurred to him how much he would like to watch instead of doing. 

Daryl pushed himself off and took the meat from his brother. He knew it was difficult for Merle to see the girl like that and he was sure it would be impossible for him to feed her on top. Daryl himself didn’t have those inhibitions. He bent down a bit so he could catch Tomas eyes.

“I think our girl over there must be starving, don’t you think? Waiting for your sorry ass to wake up and all,” he taunted, “I’m gonna give her a treat for her trouble.”

One would think it wasn’t even possible, but Tomas' eyes went even wider and as he watched, almost transfixed, how Daryl waved the meat from his own leg in front of the walker’s face as if he was playing with a dog before he let her have it his stomach gave up and he threw up. Merle managed to leap aside just in time to not get any of it on him.

“Hey, Merle, I think she’s still hungry, how about one more steak for the lady?”

“Sure thing,” Merle said with feigned enthusiasm. He squatted down and leaned against the wall to slice another piece. He went for the side of the thigh this time, not wanting to step into the vomit on the floor. The smell was disgusting enough. 

He started to cut again only this time, Tomas passed out again. Daryl took the meat anyway and fed it to walker Beth while Merle tried very hard not to think about how disturbing that scene was. 

“Are we going to kill him now?” Merle asked, sounding rather calm. “I’m kinda tired and it’s annoying to wait for him to wake up all the time.”

Daryl looked at him, he wanted to strangle Tomas himself, but this was Merle’s time, he wouldn’t take the final from him, so he shrugged, “sure if you wanna.”

Merle didn’t wait, he just drove the knife through Tomas' head. He then walked to Daryl and did the same with Beth causing her body to go limp. Finally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter :-) until next time xxx


	10. Chapter 10

“We should check out the generator later, see if it’s still working,” Daryl broke the silence, voicing the subject of his cogitating on their way back to the cellblock C, where Lumen should be waiting and where they were going to leave Beth’s body as they promised Maggie. He was in a good mood, even though it wasn’t him who got to kill Tomas, he was still content. 

He never even thought about the possibility of having his brother with him on something like this. He didn’t even consider it. Not only because he didn’t think Merle would go for it. He didn’t believe he’d like it to have Merle there. But today proved him otherwise. He discovered a new thing about himself, that he quite enjoyed to watch. Watching Merle work on Tomas was almost as much satisfying as squeezing the life out of someone by himself, _almost_. 

Merle was the one carrying the blanket in which Beth was wrapped up. He turned to his brother, somehow taken aback by the topic inside of Daryl’s head, but he shook it off quickly. He braced himself, trying very hard not to think about who he was carrying. It was not like him to act like a pussy, this whole thing was fucking him up and he needed to get his head straight. Daryl actually had a point. The generator could be a good thing. If not for lights then for a freezer and hot water.  
“Yeah, good thinking, we’ll see if it’s working,” Merle agreed in the end, “later though, tomorrow maybe, I have plans for tonight.”

“Plans?” Daryl asked frowning, “what kind of plans could you possibly have here?”

“I plan on going through the offices on booze hunt as soon as we drop her off,” he nodded to the body in his arms. Daryl’s frown disappeared and instead, an understanding smirk broke on his face. 

They walked the rest of the hallway getting to the corner leading to the cellblock they were aiming for when an after thought came to Merle, “if we’ll get the generator going we’d need to find some fuel for it too.”

“Yeah, one thing at the time, we’ll see about getting it going first.” Daryl nodded and quicken his pace after he rounded the corner. He couldn’t wait to get to Lumen. His blood ran high on the previous events and he was looking forward to letting out some steam himself. Preferably inside of her.

The cell block was quiet, almost disturbingly quiet. They found everybody from the search party in the common room, waiting on them. Nobody was talking though. 

Maggie was sitting at one of the tables staring at nothing, silent tears trickled down her cheeks. Glenn was sitting by her side but he wasn’t touching her, he still looked rather ill. T-Dog was sitting on the stairs to the door leading out of the cellblock. Rick was standing near the bars dividing the area from the cells, looking more than troubled. The pregnant lady was nowhere to be found, neither was Lumen nor the kid. Daryl expected them to be inside, either tending to the old man or helping the other girl whose name he forgot yet again. 

Merle laid Beth’s body down on the table Maggie was sitting at, “here,” being the only thing leaving his mouth. 

Maggie broke off her trance at his approach. She glanced at the blanket and then at him, “he’s dead?”

“Yeah,” Merle confirmed, not really wanting to go into more detail. He wasn’t sure if she even wanted to know. Whatever the case he decided to end the conversation and searched with his eyes for Daryl, who was on his way to the cellblock, to get Lumen most likely.

“She’s not there,” T-Dog spoke up, Daryl’s head snapped to his direction.

“What do you mean she’s not there? I told her to wait for us here.”

T-Dog shrugged, “they were already gone when we got here. Lori told us Amy didn’t want to stay here and since- you know, we don’t have to watch our back for those assholes anymore. So they left, to your room I think.”

Daryl looked around only now realizing that Axel wasn’t present either. He let out a huff and shaking his head he turned around to go back to their room. Merle moved to follow when- 

“Hey, can I have a word with you two. It’ll be just a minute.” Rick called for them. Merle glared at him, not at all in the mood for any discussion about boundaries or any other stupid shit Rick had to say.

Daryl didn’t even bother to look back, with a snort he left. 

Seeing that Rick raised his hands in placating gesture, “I don’t want to argue or anything, I just wanted to thank you. You know, for actually helping us look for the girls.” Merle nodded to show he heard him and was about to leave again, but Rick wasn’t finished, “wait! I just wanted to say that I see now you were just trying to help, and I think it’s about time to talk about the deal we had again. We can work together.”

Merle looked him up and down, licking his dry lips which only reminded him how thirsty he was. His mission to find more booze freshly on his mind, “shit, you still don’t get it, do you? I don’t give a shit about you, the damn deal, or your people,” Merle bit out, pointedly shifting his eyes to the miserable looking people in the room, dead body included. “I do whatever I have to to take care of me and mine, and from the looks of it I’m doing much better job than your sorry ass.” 

It was a low blow, and he didn’t really mean what he said, but when had that ever stopped him from saying something. He’d say anything to shut Rick up and be done with him at this point. 

Rick hanged his head, hands on his hips, thinking, but before he came up with a response Merle left, heading for the offices. He would give his left arm for a bottle of anything with alcohol in it right about now.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Daryl tried to open the door to their room only to find it locked. His first instinct was to kick it open, but he held himself back. It was actually good they did that. Maybe Oscar had to leave for whatever reason. Maybe Lumen was treating Amy. So he took a deep breath, slowly let it out and knocked. The door was opened only seconds later by Oscar. He was holding his forefinger to his lips nodding behind him, then opened the door wider revealing the girl sleeping on one of the couches.

Daryl searched the room with his eyes, but before he could voice his question Oscar whispered, “Lumen is in your room,” then he closed the door quietly, locking it again, letting his hand linger on the lock he asked, “where’s your brother?” 

“He went to see if he finds anything useful in them offices,” Daryl answered already moving to the other door.

“When you say useful, you talking about liquor, right?” Oscar asked with his eyebrows raised, Daryl only shrugged but it was an answer enough.  
“Thank God!” Oscar breathed out, sounding rather relieved, it was Daryl’s turn to raise his eyebrow in question. Oscar went to his own couch, “what? I hope he’ll find some, after what I saw today, after what I heard here, I could use a shot... or ten.” He sat with a thud, looking tired. 

Daryl didn’t comment, he didn’t feel it. He didn’t feel the sorrow the way the others did. He was still rather content, slightly irritated too, but he couldn’t put his finger on why. Could be he was irritated by Lumen not waiting for him where he asked her to, but he decided already on his way here that there was really no point in her waiting in the other cellblock when Tomas and Andrew were gone now. So the irritation obviously wasn’t completely from that. Maybe the fact he didn’t get to kill Tomas was bugging him more than he let himself believe. 

Brushing this thought from his mind, he went into their room, closing the door behind him, fully intending to get rid of some of that irritation by fucking.

What he didn’t count on was the effect this all had on Lumen. It started to dawn on him pretty quickly though when he found her with the same fucking distant look everybody else wore, staring absently out of the window. She hadn’t even noticed he entered the room. 

Daryl stared at her back, not sure what to do. Eventually, he decided to just sit on the couch and wait, to give her room to process whatever she needed to process. 

“Amy told us what they did to her,” Lumen broke the silence after few minutes, letting Daryl know that she was aware of his presence after all, “I mean, not details really at first, only so I would know what injuries she had,” she paused to lick her lips, before continuing quietly, “but it was like once she started to talk she couldn’t stop. She talked and talked and the image she drew- I just can’t get out of my head. She- she told us how they raped her while making her watch Beth’s dead body whispering _‘that’s gonna be you, that’s gonna be you soon, but not yet’_ over and over. I mean, how can people do something like that to other people?”

Daryl looked at her in disbelief, but then realized she couldn’t see him so he stood up, and went around her to lean against the window frame. She didn’t budge, her gaze fixed on the window. He reached out to tilt her head up so he could look into her eyes.

“Are you seriously asking _me_ that question?”

Her eyes came to focus and she took in his appearance. He had blood on his hands, literally, it was on his shirt too, and at that moment a memory buried a long time ago emerged. Him gutting Paul. The precise way he prepared everything for the kill, which spoke volume about how many times he probably did the very same things before. And she felt sick again.

Daryl could see the change of the color on her face, or rather the sudden lack of it and he handed her a bottle of water they had stocked in the room. He squatted in front of her and waited for her to pull herself together.

“What I meant is, you know first hand how fucked up people are, you have your scars to prove it. I know it, and I have mine to prove it too. The only difference between us is, I discovered the ugly truth about people when I was still a kid, and therefore accepted it very long time ago. I know helping people somehow makes you feel better. But I don’t work that way. Now, I was still practically a kid when I realized what makes _me_ feel better. Before I met you it was actually the only thing making me feel anything at all besides the ever present anger. So how about we make a deal, to keep us both satisfied. You just do your thing and I’ll do mine,” he smirked seeing the smallest smile tugging on her face. Yes, she remembered their first deal ever too, “darling, let me worry about all the assholes left, yeah?” 

Lumen’s eyes danced between his, she found herself to actually be grateful hearing this. She felt awful for it, but she felt it anyway. 

He was right all along. She wasn’t a fighter, she liked helping people, she liked making them better. Yes, she could kill one of those dead things anytime, but people? She had trouble with that. And here he was, offering to look after her, to do the dirty work because to him it’s no trouble at all, quite the opposite actually. 

She knew it probably wasn’t right, but after seeing Amy today, she was done with what’s right and what’s wrong. This new world didn't care about right and wrong. The only thing that mattered now was keeping as many people as she could save. 

Thinking about it, she counted herself lucky to have Daryl on her side, it was as if he was born for this world where she obviously was not. So she leaned forward and sealed the deal with a kiss, suddenly feeling as if she just made a deal with the devil.

He broke off after a moment, “come lie down with me.”

“I’m not really in the mood for fucking Daryl,” she said slightly annoyed with his one-way train of thought.

“Good thing I didn’t say anything about fucking then, right?” He didn’t wait for an answer and was already tugging her up from her chair, dragging her to the couch. 

Lumen lied down with Daryl following right behind her, pressing his body against her back. She was practically trapped between him and the backrest. The stress was starting to get the better of her. Her body was tense and she knew there was no way she’ll fall asleep now. 

She did her best to not think about Amy in the other room, beaten and broken but she couldn’t. She was about to give up on sleeping and move back to her spot by the window when Daryl’s hand moved from where it was gripping her arm and started to caress her skin. It roamed up her arm to her shoulder, then down over her side to her hip, then back up and around her to her belly. He kept doing this until he felt her relax under this ministration, and when he heard a quiet content sigh he slid between her legs. 

His own breathing got louder, his touch more urgent than comforting, which yanked her out of her relaxation. Not really because of where his hand went, but because she only now remembered in what state said hand was. She didn’t want that blood anywhere near her pussy.

“Daryl-” she tried to protest, her fingers circling around his forearm as she tried to tug it away without success.

“You smell so good,” Daryl’s voice sounded hoarse as he whispered into her ear, “you feel so good,” his hand not budging from where it was buried between her thighs, working on her through her pants making her for a second forget why she was protesting in the first place. He moved closer to her and she felt the reason for the change of his mood pressing into her ass.

“Don’t you worry, I’ll do all the work, you just lay there and relax, I’ll go nice and slow, just like you like it,” he continued while nuzzling the back of her neck, tugging her pants and panties down at the same time.

The air hit her hot skin and she remembered her issue, “the blood!” She blurted out, “don’t put your fingers in me with the blood all over them.” 

Daryl paused for a second, his horny mind trying to work out what she was talking about until he realized he didn’t have a shower. He didn’t even wash his hands. He didn’t give a damn too, but he did want to keep her happy. 

“You got it,” he rasped while freeing one of her legs from her pants, then did a quick work of freeing himself from his own. He pushed himself up a bit and was now looming over her body. She was still lying on her side, and he lifted her leg and moved it over his hip for better access.

Moving closer he let his dick slide over her wetness, “you help me in then,” he instructed while pushing against her. 

Lumen was watching him the whole time. It wasn’t very dark yet, but it was gloomy. In the contrast with the window behind him, he looked more like a shadow but it gave enough of a light for the blood to be visible, his right hand was now holding her thigh in place around him. His hips were moving against her slowly and his eyes were boring into hers, waiting for her to move.

The only word her mind offered her for this was obscure, but to her surprise, she was turned on by it. And so without breaking the eye contact, she guided him in and as promised he moved slowly, making little circles with his hips that made her cover her mouth with her hands to keep her from moaning loudly. 

She thought there was no way she would be up for fucking that night, but she was obviously wrong. And then it hit her, this actually didn’t feel like fucking, this felt like making love. 

Neither of them uttered another word during the whole time they enjoyed each other. The loudest sound being the grunt Daryl made when he came after her body squeezed it out of him when her own orgasm hit her.

They didn’t talk afterward either. They just waited in silence for the sleep to come. Daryl was out first and couple of hours later Lumen heard Merle returning, and not long after she eventually fell asleep too.

Merle, like Daryl before, found the door locked. Oscar quickly let him in after several rather loud knocks, “Oh wow, we’re like the royalty here! Having a doorman and all, are you gonna polish my boots too?” Merle snickered. 

“Fuck you!” Oscar whisper shouted before motioning to Amy’s sleeping form, “keep it down you moron, she’s sleeping.”

Merle’s eyes landed on the girl, the sight of her bruised face somewhat sobering him up a bit, but he didn’t linger on her for long. He sat on his own couch and fished several bottles of various alcohol from the sack Oscar only now noticed, the last being a rum. Merle shook it in front of Oscar’s face to get his attention off of his founding.

"Ha! I knew this will shut you up. Get yourself a cup or something, I ain’t giving this bottle out of my hand tonight.” Merle said with a slight stutter, obviously having some of the content of his bag in him already. 

Oscar didn’t care, he needed a drink. 

Amy didn’t want him to leave when Lumen had been doing the check up. She was clinging to him as if he was a life jacket and unwillingly he had to listen to everything they discussed. He was grateful when she was given something to help her sleep. And when Daryl mentioned what was Merle up to he hoped for anything, and so now he took the cup, downed half of it in one go, which sadly didn’t make him feel better at all. He was all for doing his best to drink himself to sleep tonight. And so when he finished his mug he leaned over for a refill.

Merle gave it without a blink. He watched the brown liquid make its way, not taking his eyes off it he cleared his throat uncomfortably, before asking, “so, what did Lumen say? Any permanent damage?” There was no need to specify who and what he was talking about.

Oscar took his now full cup with a nod, “everything should heal,” he answered after a moment, “from what I understood they beat her, raped her in ways guaranteeing we don’t have to worry about the possibility of little Tomas or Andrew running around,” he took a sip, then checked with his eyes if hers are still closed, “I still feel like an asshole, thinking of that as the good news,” he added quietly avoiding eye contact.  
If he tried to look at Merle though he would find him not looking at him either. That was the last thing said between them that night too as they continue to work their way through first, second, and half of the third bottle. Only then they were both ready attempt sleeping.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In the morning, Merle woke up to another hangover. He didn’t touch the pills though, he still haven’t decided if he wanted to give them up yet, but he just wasn’t in the mood. Or at least that’s what he told himself.

He looked around only to find the room quiet. Amy was still sleeping only now she was turned, with her back to him. Oscar was nowhere to be found, probably gone to take a piss. Merle went to the cabinet for a bottle of water which didn’t help any. He sat back down on the couch and reached for the still half full bottle of bad whiskey they didn’t finish yesterday, deciding the best cure for a hangover was a little shot.

He was about to put the bottle back down on the table when he saw movement in his peripheral vision. Amy was waking up. He froze, not sure what to do. 

She looked quite hysterical when she saw him yesterday. Should he let his presence known, or should he stay quiet? He had no idea, this situation was completely alien to him. She looked a bit disoriented, as she looked around herself. Probably result of that little help for her sleep, he knew all about the effect of that pills, his mind made up he cleared his throat loudly to let her know she’s not alone.

Amy turned around, her hand going to her forehead immediately, as her head started to throb more after the sudden move. She rubbed it a couple of times before she looked at him. He swore he could tell the second all the events of the previous day hit her. Her eyes went wide and started to move frantically around the room, either looking for threats or looking for Oscar. After a minute they landed on him again. 

She tried to stand but she dropped back down with a grimace. Everything seemed to hurt.

“Easy now,” Merle rasped quietly, his own throat not working well this early. He shifted closer, making her haunted eyes focus on him again. He showed her the bottle of water, “you should drink some. It’s the meds Lumen gave you for sleeping that makes your head hurt most likely. You need to drink,” he explained, holding the bottle out for her to take. She slowly reached out and as soon as her fingers closed around the bottle, Merle let go and moved back to his place.

Amy looked from the bottle to him several times, “thanks,” she whispered in the end before unscrewing the cap and drinking few sips.

“Lumen is with Daryl in the next room. You want me to get her?” He asked after several uncomfortable minutes.

She seemed to think about it but shook her head 'no' in the end, still staring at the bottle in her hands. Just then the door opened and Oscar walked in with some cans in his hands, _thank fuck for that,_ Merle thought, standing up.

Oscar took in the scene and moved to Amy, leaving the cans on the table on his way to her.

“Hey there,” he said kneeling down in front of her. “You got a headache?” He asked to which she nodded, “I brought you some canned fruit, Lumen told me the sugar should help with that.”

She glanced Merle’s way swiftly before answering, “I’m not hungry, he gave me water.”

Oscar looked back at him too, nodding, then turned back to her, “Yeah, that’s good too. You need to hydrate, but you need to eat something too.” 

Merle watched the exchange, noticing how relaxed Amy was with Oscar right next to her. Very much the opposite of how very much not relaxed she was with him in the room. 

Suddenly he didn’t want to be there, he wanted to be any place other than this room.

“Hey, you tell my brother I went to check the generator when he wakes, yeah?” he said and walked out of the room heading outside. He wanted to get his smokes, he wanted a shower and maybe a new place to sleep. Maybe he’d join Axel in the cellblock. He was done with this shit.

He went to his truck and fished a pack of cigarettes immediately lighting one. He then took two canisters with fuel, deciding to try if the generator wasn’t just out of juice before looking for anything else. He made a stop at the showers and then at the cafeteria for some breakfast. It must have been pretty early because he didn’t see anyone else.

Deciding it was for the best, he went to the generator room. He only glanced at the two pools of blood. The only reminder of what happened in there. He was the one dragging Tomas body out of the prison after he found the liquid treasure. He drank nearly half of the bottle of the rum afterward too. Not really mad about what they did to Tomas, but because they were too late for the little woman.

He moved past the first room to the joined one where the actual generator was. He rather quickly discovered the problem isn’t just in an empty tank and started to look for the cause of the failure. It took some time but eventually, he was able to find it and with the tools, he found in the maintenance office he started to work on it. It wasn’t anything serious, no needs for new parts, just some cleaning. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’s been working there and drinking but at one point Lumen seemingly materialized beside him.

“Hey,” she said, looking at what he was doing.

“What a joy, you finally remembered I exist, I feel honored,” he hissed spitefully without taking his eyes from his task.

She looked at his face, taken aback by this response, “what are you talking about? We are together all the time.”

“If you say so,” he grunted, still not looking at her. 

She sighed, knowing the whole situation somehow affected him more than she expected. She couldn’t figure out why though, he didn’t do anything wrong, he wanted to help from the very second he found out something was wrong. She was rather proud of him, to be honest. Seeing his mood now though she knew this was not the time.

“You know, the others, Rick’s group I mean, they are doing a funeral for Beth. I just thought maybe you’d wanted to come.”

“Yeah, you thought wrong,” he said, spitting to his side, “where’s Daryl anyway?”

“Still sleeping,” she shrugged. She waited for few more minutes but when he continued acting as if she wasn’t there, she decided to just give him his space and stood up, “Well, I’m going. You are more than welcome to join us. It might do you good, you know, to say goodbye.”

“Why the fuck would I want to say goodbye?” He finally turned to look at her, “I didn’t even know the bitch.” He spat again, and again took a swing from the bottle standing by his side.

“Alright then,” Lumen said and left.

He tried to work on his task but he just couldn’t, ”FUCK!” he yelled, finally giving up he just threw the screwdriver to the side.

Not long after that he found himself at the side of the cellblock C, not really sure how he even got there, watching the others standing around the hole with a simple cross. Rick and T-Dog were about to put her in it, still in the blanket in which he brought her in yesterday. He looked at all the faces, seeing that not everyone was actually there. Amy, Oscar, and Daryl weren’t there. The old man was missing too, probably still too sick. But Lumen was there, not really standing with the others, she was a bit back, as was Axel. As if feeling his gaze she looked his way and even at the distance, he saw her give him a small sad smile before she turned her eyes back to the open grave. His eyes followed, watching Rick and T-Dog putting the soil back in.

“Fuck that,” Merle muttered to himself, fully intended to just walk away. But he found he couldn’t. He couldn’t tear his eyes off the scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it's been a while... I hope you enjoyed the chapter :)


	11. Chapter 11

Most of the people attending the funeral were still in the yard, waiting for Rick and T-Dog to cover the grave. The makeshift ceremony was over though and Lumen with Axel turned to head back to prison. Merle didn’t even realize he has been standing there this long. Suddenly, as if pulled out of a fog, he became very aware of the heat that replaced the early morning coolness.

He was about to go back in when the sound of the metal door being slammed against the wall announced that he was no longer alone. He turned to look and found his brother standing in a doorway. “Whatcha doin’?” Daryl tiredly looked around as he lit a smoke.

“Smoking,” Merle grunted. Only after the words left his mouth he realized his smoke was gone for awhile. He studied the butt in his hand, threw it away and pulled out the pack to light another cigaret. He saw Daryl smirking out of the corner of his eye, silently calling him out on his bullshit. “Fuck you!” Merle muttered.

Daryl chuckled, seemingly in a good mood, and a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as something had caught his attention in the distance. Merle glanced at the yard again. Rick and T-Dog seemed to be finishing with the covering of the grave. Lumen and Axel were already at the gate leading to the parking lot and she waved in their direction.

Merle looked his brother over again trying to think of a time, a situation, a fucking moment he’d seen Daryl in a good mood. He couldn’t recall a single one. There would always be this tension, this bubbling anger. But right now, he didn’t see it. This whole thing had to be his wet dream. No police, no punishment, no nothing. Just a playground to do whatever.

“Fuck,” Merle breathed out silently. Standing in front of him was probably the only person on the entire planet who was content with the apocalypse. Go figure. The thought of popping one of those little fuckers in his pocket suddenly seemed like a not so bad of an idea. Just as the idea came, his mind gifted him with an image of a bloody face of a little blond, snapping mouth, dead eyes… He felt sick again, completely forgetting the pills.

“You looked at the generator?” Daryl pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah, needs cleaning. We’ll need more fuel for it too,” Merle replied, actually grateful for the distraction from his own brain.

“Alright,” Daryl said, nodding slightly. “I’ll just pack some things and we’ll go,” he agreed easily.

“Go where?” Lumen’s voice broke in.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

When they got back to their room, Amy was still at the same position on the couch. There was a can of fruit mix in her hand and she was chewing slowly. Her expression blank.

Oscar jumped up from his spot as soon as the door clicked open, revealing Merle’s form. “Lumen’s not with you?” he asked, looking at the door expectantly as if he was trying to summon her by will.

“She’s just behind me,” Merle informed while starting to pack his bag. Daryl made a beeline for the other room to do the same with an angry looking Lumen on his track.

Oscar watched them for a moment. No way he was staying behind babysit while they go wherever. He liked Amy, he felt really sorry for her, but he also had no idea what to do with her and he wanted out. However, he wasn’t that much of an asshole to just leave her alone. “What are you two up to?” he asked, still watching.

“The generator seems to be in need of some maintenance but it will work just fine. We’re going to look for fuel,” Merle explained while putting supplies in his bag.

“All of you?”

“Well actually-”

“Yes, all of us,” Lumen interrupted him from the doorway.

Daryl strolled out of their room, “Sweetheart, you are not going I told you.”

“Oh, no, no, no! You can’t tell me what to do, or not to do. We just found you. We are not gonna split again!” she argued in that silent angry voice Daryl knew so well.

Merle took his eyes from the cans he was packing and looked at her. He paused for a second then turned to Daryl. “On that note, I think it will be best if I’ll go alone. Daryl, you stay here with her.” Some alone time was exactly what he needed. He needed some fresh air, to get away.

Daryl’s expression changed in an instant, and a “What the hell?” resonated through the room at the same time as Lume hissed, “The hell you will! I won’t let you go alone!”

Merle snorted, “Oh so we can’t tell you what to do, but you can boss us around? I don’t think so missy!”

Lumen took a few steps in his direction. She briefly met Oscar’s eyes before focusing on Merle again, “are you for real? You know how it looks out there. You need to listen to me, you can’t go alone! It’s a suicide!”

“I am a grown ass man, I don’t need to listen to shit!” Merle said in a dismissive tone.

“Are you saying I am not grown ass man?” Daryl’s angry voice broke in.

“You got a pussy to look after. Better you stay here too.” Merle didn’t even know why was he saying what he was saying. He just wanted this argument to stop and for his brother and Lumen to stay safe.

“Fuck you, Merle!” Lume shouted. She knew Beth’s death affected him, but that’s no excuse for this, she was pissed now.

“You had a chance and you blew it,” Merle winked at her, happy with himself for getting her railed up like this.

“I’ll go with him,” Oscar suddenly stepped in. Merle looked at him as if he forgot Oscar was in the room with them.

“Fuck this shit, Y'all do what you want.” Daryl returned to the other room and slammed the door behind him. He didn’t what made him angrier. The fact his brother was still bossing him around as if he was a little boy or the fact he actually listened to him, again.

“Um,” Oscar tore his eyes from the closed door and locked them with Merle, silently pleading him to not to argue, “I’ll have your back, I’ll go.” He then said to Lumen, “I think you really should stay here,” subtly motioning to Amy who seemed to be fairly unaffected by the whole discussion.

“Right,” Lumen muttered, now regretting the whole argument. If she agreed right away Daryl would be probably coming with Merle and she would be much calmer, “thanks,” she awkwardly smiled at Oscar.

 _There goes my alone time_ , Merle thought. But this was a better solution. Lumen would be safe with Daryl, and Oscar never really talked to him anyway. “Okay then, pack your things we are leaving right away.”

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After no luck in one small city. They followed a gas station sign to another one. All gas stations were usually empty as that’s where people went first, but they decided to check it out anyway. Better safe than sorry and all that. Their assumption was right, it was empty. Thought near the station was a pharmacy in the little shopping center and so Merle went there with a list Lumen gave him, but really just take whatever was there to be found, while Oscar stayed on guard. Things went to hell fast.

“How could you not see them sooner!” Merle hissed.

Oscar just shook his head, he didn’t even try to form an answer. He didn’t know. It was as if they just materialized out of nothing. The parking lot was deserted and all of sudden there they were, a horde of them limping in their way.

“What are you still doing here you fucking idiot? Go get the truck. I’ll take what I can and meet you in the back.”

Oscar stayed frozen for a moment but shook himself quickly and bolted out of the door.

Merle blocked the door behind him and continued to empty the already almost empty shelves into his bag. He heard when the dead reached the glass door, and soon after that the engine of the truck.

That was his clue, closing the bag hastily and ran to the back door to meet Oscar on the other side of the complex. He got through the door and stopped. There was no one there. He looked left then right but nothing. He didn’t even hear the truck. What the fuck? He thought about going back inside just as he started to turn around he heard the tale-telling klick of the closing door. He tried the knob but the door wouldn’t open from the outside. Then he saw it. From both sides of the complex, the walkers started to make their way toward him. “Fuck!”

He weighed his options, he could try other doors, but chances were none of them could be opened from the outside. Looking around he saw the walkers closing on him. The nearest building was the empty gas station even though it was still far enough.

And so he hopped down from the ramp and started running. _Ha! Got my back my ass!_ Merle thought as he ran for his life.

The walkers were slower but they were many and he needed to find a place in the station to hide well enough for them to hopefully move on.

He burst through the door and pushed the closest shelf against it. The lock was broken but this could slow them down for a bit.

What now? He looked around the space. The station wasn’t that small, but it was small enough to not have many places to hide. It had several freezers from which the awful smell of rotten food was most likely coming from, one door marked ‘toilet’ and one door marked ‘staff only’.

Merle walked quickly to it. He was about to turn the knob when he heard a thump coming right from the other side of the door. _Shit! Well, no time to waste_ , he thought and opened the door quickly, his knife ready to strike but instead of a dead person trying to take a bite out of him, he was greeted with a gun barrel and a quiet growl. “Drop the knife.”

On the other side of the gun was a person, quite tall. Still few inches shorter than him but he was taller than most. The stranger had a hoodie on, his head hidden and a bandana over his face.

Taken by surprise Merle didn’t react right away, “Drop it!” The person whisper shouted again, and now hearing the voice again, looking at the delicate small hand gripping the gun, it registered that the strange guy in front of him was actually a girl.

Merle did as told. As soon as his knife hit the ground she moved forward, kicking it with her foot, resulting in it sliding under the freezer on her left side, disappearing from his sight, great, “back, move back!” she instructed, and he did, reluctantly, but the gun was pointed at his face and he needed the right amount of distance if he wanted to get the upper hand.

“Hey now, there is no need for th-”

“Shut up! Where are your buddies?” She cut him off, quickly looking around and back at him. When he didn’t say anything she urged him on, jerking the gun in front of him, “Tell me! Where are they?” she asked again.

“Make up your mind lady! You either want me to shut up or you want me to chat with you!” He said, cracking a laugh, even though the situation wasn’t really funny. The walkers would be here any minute now. He could see she was nervous, she sounded maybe a little pissed, but she kept nervously looking around as if expecting to be jumped. She was talking quietly although she sounded as if she wanted to scream in his face. That kind of nervousness could make one pull the trigger without even meaning to. Merle’s attempt at lightening the mood fell on deaf ears though.

“I know you assholes never travel alone. Where are they?!”

“Well fuck me, if this isn’t the fastest someone called me an asshole,” He tried to joke and break some of the tension.

With no success, he realized as her dry, “Yeah I doubt that,” reached his ears.

“Usually, they don’t call me an asshole ‘til the morning.” He laughed but recovered quickly when he saw her hold on the gun tighten, as if she was preparing herself for the shot, “alright, alright. Calm your tits, there are no buddies. I’m here alone.” He said, making a little step backward.

“Yeah right,” she uttered sarcastically, quickly looking to the sides.

“Yeah, right,” he mocked, mimicking higher woman’s voice, “for Christ’s sake,” he muttered.

She was standing right in front of him. She couldn’t very well miss from that distance but it was also a bad move on her part. Deciding to not risk this any longer since she didn’t look anywhere near to calming down, putting his skills from the army to use, Merle took one more little step back and then, moving fast, he disarmed her in three quick moves. In two seconds she was the one at the end of the gun.

He saw panic flicker in her eyes but she recovered quickly, she straightened up she barked, “I’m not going anywhere with you!” No longer being careful about being quiet. She must have thought she would attract his buddies earlier.

“The fuck? I’m not asking you to! I just don’t want you to shoot me by accident, your hands were shaking.”

“They were not!” She said, sounding offended, she then looked from the gun to his face, “Well, let me go then.”

“Nobody’s keeping you,” he said motioning with one hand to the doors in a wide gesture, only to find said door full of walkers. “Shit.” He launched to the side to retrieve his knife.

“Give me my gun back,” the girl urged, moving closer to him, their argument momentarily forgotten.

“You got a knife?” He asked, looking at her. She nodded quickly she reached to her side but came up empty-handed.

“Shit! It’s still in the closet!” She said, again in whisper shouting quiet voice.

“Let’s go get it?” Merle nodded for her to go first. She hurried to the still open door and came out with some kind of dagger.

“Nice.” Merle complimented, and started to move around the regals.

“Wait,” she stopped him, grabbing his arm out of reflex, and letting go as soon as she realized what she’s done, “my gun,” she tried again.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, I’m not gonna help you fight your way out of here only for you to shoot me in the back as soon as we get out.” He snickered just as some of the windows shattered and the smell of rotten flesh got worse and the inarticulate noise of the dead got louder.

“Give me my gun and I’ll help you out of this,” she offered without future explanation.

Oh well, if she’ll shoot me it will be faster than being eaten, he decided. He switched the safety on he handed it back to her, his movements slow, his eyes wary.

She took it but instead of putting it to use she crouched down and made her way toward the freezers, “come one,” she urged.

Merle didn’t react at first, but then he saw her pull one of the doors. Not the freezer handle though, she pulled on something on the other side and revealed a dark passage. That got him to move.

He hurried to her side and they both slipped into the dark hallway. She quickly closed the door behind them and Merle found himself in absolute darkness.

A hand grabbed his arm and tugged on it to make him move. He reluctantly followed, keeping one hand on the wall to make himself feel grounded.

“Careful here,” she whispered, “there are round steps. It’s spiral stairs, we’ll make two rounds and I’ll switch the light on when we are down. Ready?”

Very uncomfortable about being dependent on some stranger, a stranger who was about to shoot him just a moments ago on top of that, he just grunted affirmatively which she seemed to get because she started to move again.

In his distrust state, Merle moved slowly and the walk seemed to last forever. Based on the sound the stairs was metal which gave him an odd feeling of familiarity and his army training popped out in his head for some reason. He tried to focus on here and now though and when they finally got down, he heard a lock opening, then a door creaked and she pulled him through it and the door creaked again as she closed it. The hold on his arm disappeared and after a few dreadful moments the silence was broken by a sound of a generator and the lights flicked on.

“Shit!” Merle cursed as the sudden brightens hurt his eyes.

“Oh! Sorry, I should have warned you,” the girl actually sounded apologetic.

Merle slowly opened his eyes, the light wasn’t actually that bright. It hurt before most likely just because his eyes were trying to accommodate to the dark. As soon as he realized where he was, he forgot all about the damn light.

He saw a big room full of shelves placed around the walls and in at least eight rows with care so there was enough space to walk between them, and they were packed with food and other supplies. He could see another door at the back of the room.

“Holy shit! You got yourself a survival bunker! Talking about hitting jackpot!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, anyone still around? I know it has been months since my last update, but today an inspiration hit me and so... here it is. Another chapter. I was planning on adding this new character for a long time and I am really happy about being able to finally introduce her (though only briefly) 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed ;)


	12. Chapter 12

Merle's excitement about the underground treasure was palpable. Yes, in the prison, they now had the rest of the cafeteria supplies, but that won't last forever and they will need to restock. This place looked like heaven to him. He was so focused on not tripping over his own legs on their way down he didn't think much about what to expect down here. A small basement maybe? Certainly not a bunker this big. His eyes ran over the metal shelves full of packaged food, cans, water gallons... The metal door at the other end of the room caught his attention again and he briefly wondered what are the chances of that being an armory.

"We are gonna be alright down here till they move on." The girl's voice pulled him out of the musing.

For a second there he forgot he had a company. He turned to her, giving her his full attention. She wasn't far from him. The dagger was now nowhere to be seen. The gun was still in her hand but at least she wasn't pointing it at him. She learned her lesson though because she was standing out of his reach. The light was actually rather dim now that he got used it, but he could still see her face clearly. She still wore the hoodie but she pulled the bandana down from her face and it hung around her neck.

"I'm sure we will." Merle smirked hoping to break the ice. He had plenty of options on mind to help them pass the time. She still had the gun at ready though so he decided to keep it to himself for now.

"First thing's first," she said and took a small step in his direction. She had bright, smart eyes and her mouth was in a thin line, she meant business. "Here's how this is gonna be. There is a sitting area behind that door"— she motioned to the door he spotted moments ago, _not an armory then_ —"you gonna sit there quietly until the fucking zombies move on, and then you leave and never come back," she spoke in strong, almost commanding voice. "I am not a bad person by nature but you try anything, and I mean _anything_ , I will ghost you. You come back at any time in the future and I'll ghost you, you'll tell anybody about this place I'll-"

"Let me guess"— Merle jumped in, rolling his eyes, a smile tugging on his lips —"you'll ghost them, me and whoever we ever spoke t—"

"Shut up!" she yelled and in a few long strides, she was suddenly in front of him. The gun in her hand and the reason she kept her distance momentarily forgotten. The situation was frying her nerves and she had enough. "You find this amusing? You think I'm joking?" With each question, he felt one of her fingers poke his chest. He was aware she wasn't joking, but she looked too damn funny at the moment. "If I have to pick between me and you, or anybody else for that matter, I will always pick me," she trailed off seeing her speech had no effect on him whatsoever. "What are you still grinning about, are you deaf?"

"No," he answered and with a shit eating grin reached out and tapped the gun in her other hand but didn't try to take it from her. "You just gave me another opening, you gotta be more careful."

Startled by her own mistake she backed off quickly only to crash into one of the racks behind her. The metal shelf rattled and a sharp pain in her side made her bent over a little and she cursed under her breath, "motherfucking fuck, damn it!" Though she lost the eye contact only for a moment and he was under her angry gaze soon enough.

 _If looks could kill_... Merle thought, _okay, time to cool down the hot head_. "Look, I get it. It's the motherfucking apocalypse. I can see how that'd make a pretty gal like yourself a little skittish."

Her eyes narrowed at his jest and she opened her mouth ready to say something but he was quick to continue; his hands moved up in a placating gesture as if on their own accord.

" _Seriously!_ You have nothing to worry about. If it'll make you feel better I'll just sit in that damn sitting area of yours and be all fucking gentleman like about it."

A million thoughts seemed to run through her mind if the parade of expressions crossing her face was anything to go by. Probably not really sure what to make of his statement or if she should trust it. She straightened up, still rubbing the sore spot where she hit herself before. Her mouth opened and closed several times but no words came out; a frown creased her forehead.

He was right, they were already there and she was not about to shoot him. Not without a provocation. And anyway, what did he really do besides some stupid remarks and grinning a lot, nothing. Once she gave herself a minute to calm down and actually think she realized she probably overreacted a little, just a bit though. She was certainly not about to apologize for it. 

 

"Okay," she agreed in the end. "Let's go then, I'll show you around." She made a half turn and just as Merle made a move to follow she turned abruptly back and said in much calmer manner. "You make a move though, just one and I—"

"Ghost me, gotcha." He winked and gave her finger guns.

She rolled her eyes, pretty sure he didn't take her seriously at all. On one hand this careless, relaxed way about him could mean he really meant no harm. On the other hand it could mean he knew he had the upper hand and therefore didn't need to be worried. _Damn it_. Not really sure what to say she muttered, "Just, just don't break anything," facepalming herself internally as soon as she spoke the words.

Merle grinned like a cat who ate a canary. "I'll be careful, don't you worry."

She bit her lip to stay quiet, there was no winning this. She led the way to the metal door. She opened it, reached in to switch the lights on and motioned for him to go in first.

He did but stopped in the threshold to inspect the room first. This part of the bunker was nice enough. It was a small space but clean, with all the other basics they would need. A small table with two chairs served as a dining area, and there was even an electric burner to heat up food on the tiny counter. On the opposite side of the room were a bed hanging from chains. It looked quite fun to fuck in. And hey, then the girl could call him an asshole in the morning too. He grinned to himself and moved to sit on one of the chairs and looked at her expectantly as if waiting for a praise or at least a pat on the back

She let out a very unladylike snort. Not commenting on his theatrics. She entered the room too. Her movements were automatic, showing she has been there long enough to settle in a routine. Though she kept a watchful eye on him while doing her thing.

With just a fraction of hesitation, she placed the gun on a small folding table next to the bed. Then she turned on the ventilation and the little burner in the tiny kitchen-like area. Then pulled out a pot, opened the cupboard and turned fully to him with a can in each hand. "What are you in a mood for? Today, it's beans or ratatouille."

"Rata-what?" he asked, squinting trying to make up what was on the label from the distance.

She thrusted the can in front of his face. "It's lots of veggies in a sauce. You know what? I'm gonna do it, so you can decide if you like it." She then turned back to the cupboard with a brief glance to where the gun was laying.

"Girl, have you been outside? I am not picky, whatever you feed me I'll be a happy man." He folded his arms behind his head.

She only nodded and proceeded to open the can, dumped it in the pot and put it on the burner. The hoodie came off after that and there behind her belt was the dagger, she laid it next to the gun and toss the hoodie on the ground next to the table. She had another long sleeved shirt underneath, to Merle's disappointment.

"What the hell are you wearing? It's like a hundred degrees out there," he asked, actually curious.

She looked down at herself and then at him as if he was stupid. "Nobody knows what a scratch would do from one of those things, I want as little of their blood on my skin as possible."

"Fair enough," he rasped.

She busied herself with stirring the food. Still feeling rather nervous she needed to do something with her hands. Soon enough a steaming bowl landed in front of Merle.

"Girl, now a service like this is something I could get used to," he flashed her a smile and dug in.

"Would you stop that?"

His spoon froze on its way to his mouth. "Stop what? I ain't fucking doing anything."

"Calling me girl," she clarified in an annoyed tone. "I'm no girl."

"If you say so." His eyes started to roam and his lips slowly turned into a smile. "So what's your name, _beautiful_?"

She rolled her eyes. "It's Miri."

"Miri?" He tasted the name, giving her a doubtful look. "Is that short for something?"

"No!" she answered way too quickly, too forcefully.

It widened his smile some more. "Alright, don't tell me." He shoved the spoon in his mouth. That Rata-whatever was actually pretty good. "I'm Merle," he said over the food.

A little smile twitched the corners of her mouth. "Merle, huh? Is that short for something?"

There was a moment of absolute silence between them. "What was that? You better keep yourself in check, doll, that almost sounded like a joke."

"I just told you my name! Would you stop with the pet names?" she huffed, annoyed.

He flashed her a bright smile. "No, you didn't. You gave me some nickname. I'll call you by your name once you tell me what it really is."

"Whatever." She went back to eating, choosing to ignore him for the rest of the meal.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Several hours and many unsuccessful conversation attempts from Merle later; he started to get bored out of his mind. Miri moved to the bed and was reading some magazine, or at least she tried to make it seem like it. Every now and then, she would go to the first room, always taking the gun and the knife with her, to check on the cameras installed in the station above them. So far no luck and the walkers were still lingering around.

She was coming back from one of those checks, only shaking her head when she saw his questioning, almost hopeful gaze.

His face dropped. He never suffered claustrophobia, but then again, he never had to sit for hours locked in a bunker either. Before Miri moved to the bed again he called for her, "Hey doll, we could pass the time doing something more fun. How about we bump uglies? What do you say?"

Her hold on the gun tightened. "No."

"Come on, I'll make it worth your while." He shot her a lusty smile which didn't help his cause any.

"I don't think so, just drop it." She moved back to her spot on the bed since Merle didn't look like he was about to pounce on her.

Though he didn't stop talking either. "Believe me, if there is one thing I know how to do, it's how to fuck. Come on, it can't be worse than sitting here, boring ourselves to death."

"I'm not bored, I'm reading." She shoved him the magazine with a -didn't you notice- look.

"No, you are not," he bit back in incredulous tone. "You've been staring at that thing for hours now."

"Just drop it, will you? I'm not having sex with you! Get it through that thick skull of yours."

"Ugh, you're no fun." He shifted in his seat, with no luck trying to find more comfortable position. "You wouldn't have any booze here, huh?" He tried something else.

She laughed through a snort. "Yeah, like that's gonna happen," she muttered.

"What?" he asked as if he didn't know what she was talking about.

"Do you think I'm stupid or something? I'm not handing alcohol over to some stranger who's mindtrack seems to go in one direction only. Thank you very much."

"Now that's not fair. I've been trying to talk to you for hours and-"

"Oh yeah, I've noticed. Excuse me if I don't feel like talking about; how many layers I'm wearing or if I can do massages." She rolled her eyes.

"Give me a break, I was joking." He wasn't, his back started to hurt from sitting on the small metal chair for this long, but that was none of her business. "Seriously, I am up to anything. I'll play fucking monopoly." He rubbed the short hair on his head and then rose to his feet with a quiet "Fuck it."

The sudden move startled Miri and she scrambled for her gun.

"Jesus, calm your tits, I just gotta stretch my legs."

She gave him a weary look. "Just keep stretching where you are." There was a warning in her tone but she left the gun where it was and sat back.

"You sure are a skittish mouse," he commented while moving around to get the blood in his tired limbs pumping. Then something crossed his mind. He remembered what she asked him when she had him at gunpoint in the store above. "Hey, who did you think I was when you first saw me?"

She tilted her head, looking confused about the question. So he continued.

"Upstairs, you asked about my buddies, what group did you think I belonged to? Is there one nearby?"

"Believe me, you don't want to meet them."

"You don't seem to be worried much, living here all alone and all."

"They don't know I live here."

"But you've met them."

"Yes, I have."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Nope," she said half hearted and he gave her a look. "Alright, I guess you better know this. They're this bunch of assholes living in this town. I've been watching them for a while and I'm telling you, they are up to nothing good. They might look like an ordinary town, but I've seen what they are doing outside those walls. They kill, and take, and if you know what's good for you, you stay out of their fucking way."

"If they are so bad, why are you lurking around then."

"I have my reasons."

He gave her another look, expecting her to elaborate but she didn't. "Okay then." He let it go. "I'm gonna check on those biters upstairs."

"I just did like five minutes ago." She looked at him as if he was stupid with an underlying suspicion.

"It wasn't five minutes and whatever, if you don't wanna do nothing I'll at least stretch my legs some more.

He moved to the next room. She didn't follow and for the first time since they got down there she didn't have her eyes on him. Something about it felt like he won something.

Merle didn't expect to see any changes, but when his eyes landed on the monitor he saw the walkers leaving. "Hey girl!" He called out staining his neck to see if she's coming. When she appeared in the door he pointed to the picture. "It looks like they are moving on." He actually felt relieved.

She moved to his side. "Really, that's strange. It usually takes them longer than that. I wonder what made them move."

And just like that the relieved feeling from before evaporated. Hopefully whatever trouble made them leave the station was far enough for him to get back to the prison without meeting trouble.

Miri watched the dead bodies on the monitor moving away. Her eyes flicked between them and Merle for a few times before she asked, "How far is the place you are staying at?"

"Why are you asking?" He narrowed his eyes momentarily before breaking into a smile. "You wanna join me?"

"Yeah, right- that's a no if you were wondering." She made an annoyed face. "I was just wondering if I should pack you something.

"Aww, I'm hurt. The biters there aren't even gone and you are kicking me out already."

"A simple thank you would be enough," she muttered and turned to the shelves to make a pack for him. He might be kinda asshole, but hey, people were few and far between these days and he's at least a tolerable asshole.

Merle watched her work systematically. He was debating if he should ask her to join them, to share this but he decided now is not the time. He could always come back later, take Daryl with him- no Lumen. If he took her it could make the gal more acceptable. But did he wanna put Lumen in potential danger just for the food? She was safe and sound in the prison now.

In the end he decided to just leave the decision for later.

They waited for another hour or so before going out. There were a few lingering walkers around but otherwise the horde was gone and outside they now saw what got them moving. On the sky there was a column of smoke, as if something blew up there.

"Can it be your place?" She peered up at Merle who didn't look worried and that answered her question before he did.

"No, no. I'm not staying that way." He rubbed his hands together. "So, is any if these beauties working?" He motioned to the cars scattered around the station.

She nodded. There were several working and she had no need for all of them. So she showed him which one he could use.

Merle watched her relaxed posture. The fact they were not trapped seemed to do wonders for her confidence. He decided to chance a question. "Hey, there wouldn't happen to be a pump working here with that generator of yours."

"The tank is full, don't worry." Her mouth twitched in a shadow of smile.

"That's great to hear, though we need a little more than that. We've got a generator on our own and not enough fuel to make it work."

"Oh." A frown emerged on her forehead. She thought her answer over carefully. Her body started to get rigid again. For some reason it didn't occur to her, he could easily just come back to rob her. _Stupid_ she thought. Though maybe if she offered some freely?

"Jeez girl, I'm not asking you to marry me." He laughed. "Even though it is a yes or no question."

"There is a pump working." She made up her mind. "I'm not sure how much of the fuel is left and I don't have anything to put it in. As everywhere people went crazy here at one point. All the canisters are gone."

"But you wouldn't mind sharing though?" Now that made him happy.

"I guess, just don't go around telling people I'm here." She looked to the side, getting nervous about the agreement.

"My lips are sealed." He made a gesture as if he was locking his mouth, like a little girl which actually coaxed a faint smile on her face.

"I'll be back then." He gave her a wink then opened the rusty door and threw his bag in before making a move to get in himself but stopped midway.

"Hey girl, the town you were talking about, what's its name?"

"They call it Woodbury."

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The moment he saw the fence his mood went southway. Even though he was glad to be 'home', he immediately missed the somewhat easy going atmosphere in the bunker where he could push all this aside all this and just relax for a few hours. Suddenly he didn't feel like coming back to all the sad faces, to the grieving. An image of Amy sitting on the couch staring at nothing flashed through his mind, then Lumen's worried expression, angry Daryl, itching to go and reduce the population of the prison. And all the assholes who were so quick to assume the worse of him but didn't keep an eye on their own anyway. And now she's dead.

The last thought made him step on the gas. Not him. He'll look after his family.


End file.
